


Profoundly (Un)happy

by Lil_Sebastian



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Student/Teacher, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Enemies to Lovers, Eventual Romance, Eventual Smut, F/M, Falling In Love, First Kiss, First Time, Fluff and Smut, Force Bond (Star Wars), Love Confessions, Obsessive Kylo Ren, Possessive Behavior, Professor Ben Solo, Professor Kylo Ren, Redeemed Ben Solo, Romance, Rough Sex, Secret Relationship, Slow Burn, Smut, Teacher-Student Relationship, Virgin Rey (Star Wars)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-04
Updated: 2020-12-15
Packaged: 2021-02-27 21:53:44
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 62,317
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22552816
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lil_Sebastian/pseuds/Lil_Sebastian
Summary: When Rey Kenobi decided to write her professor a frustrated note after one of her exams, she considered the possibility of him hating her for the rest of the semester. What she couldn't have anticipated, however, was sparking a connection between the two of them. A connection more powerful than either had ever experienced.
Relationships: Kylo Ren & Rey, Kylo Ren/Rey, Rey & Ben Solo, Rey & Ben Solo | Kylo Ren, Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren
Comments: 65
Kudos: 365





	1. Chapter 1

Rey Kenobi sat nervously tapping her pen against the back cover of the Blue Book she had just closed on her desk as she looked around a nearly vacant classroom. She just completed her final essay for her Introduction to French history course at Corellia University, but hesitated before getting up to hand the booklet in to the proctor. 

Rey had been accepted into the prestigious institute upon graduating from high school and applying for admission to the school’s mechanical engineering program. Due to the fact that she had exceptional grades as well as being one of the few women interested in a male dominated field, she was offered a full-ride and jumped at the opportunity to get out of New Mexico and away from her foster home. 

Rey had always been a diligent student, and the time she spent at Corellia was no different. She had to work part-time at Maz’s Diner just to scrape by, but she maintained her A average in each of her classes all semester regardless of her lack of sleep. Except for one. 

It was unclear if her professor simply hated her, or if he had it out for everyone he taught, but no matter how much time she devoted to completing Professor Ren’s assignments she was never able to score above a B plus. Apparently, she wasn’t alone in her concerns as her fellow classmates lamented about their poor grades, most often after class had concluded and their professor impatiently bounded out of the room refusing to take any of their questions. 

“We should report him to the department chair,” she once heard a young man in her class say as he readjusted his glasses and crumbled his graded assignment into a ball, throwing it into the nearest wastebasket. “Have you read his reviews on online? Most of them just say ‘welcome to hell.’ I tried to switch out of this class when I saw he was teaching it, but he is the only one scheduled to teach both sessions of the course, so I’m fucking screwed,” replied a mousy haired girl who sat in the back of the class not far from where Rey was packing up her bag. “He is an impossible grader and he refuses to answer my questions. He just tells me I clearly don’t pay attention in class or I’m lacking the basic abilities to read and write and I should reconsider my place here at Corellia. He’s such an asshole,” added the first student. At that point a third classmate had wandered over to the discussion shaking his head. “Good luck reporting him. You know he’s Chancellor Orgnana’s son, right?” stated the newcomer causing the two other students to groan. “You have to be kidding me?” huffed the girl who dramatically threw her head back in exasperation. “No wonder he gets away with the shit he pulls daily. God, I can’t wait for this year to be over,” spit the young man with glasses as he began walking out of the room. “Nepotism really is something,” he added before exiting. 

It angered Rey to no end to hear that someone had been _given_ an opportunity like Professor Ren had when people like her had never been given anything in life. She worked hard every day since her parents left her at the orphanage back home and strongly believed it gave her meaning and purpose in life. To just be handed a position at a prestigious school like Ren had, only to act miserable day in and day out was remarkably daft and a bit nauseating. Thus, she sat at her desk contemplating whether or not to hand in her essay as is, or to give Professor Ren a piece of her mind. 

On one hand, she felt it was her job to give her teacher some constructive feedback as she had just sat through a torturous semester with him and clearly the administration at Corellia was afraid to reprimand him. Yet on the other hand, she was going to be stuck with him for another semester after the holiday break and she didn’t want him to hate her even more. She could always drop the second half of his course, but that would mean she would need to take two more consecutive history courses to meet the school’s graduating requirements and she didn’t have the money to put toward it if the school didn’t cover her dropped class. Plus, she was on schedule to graduate at the end of the year, and she was eager to apply for a Graduate program in New York. She had never been to the city, but she missed the urban bustle of London, where she had spent most of her childhood after her parents abandoned her, and the beautiful but bleak forests surrounding Corellia were starting to drive her a bit mad. 

‘I can’t not say anything,’ she thought to herself as she opened her booklet back up and flipped to the last page. Rey considered her words carefully as the end of her testing period rapidly approached. Finally, she scribbled a quick note to her teacher, closed her Blue Book and placed it on the table with the proctor before she could chicken out and take it back. 

As Rey walked out of the building and toward the parking lot, she thought about the note she had written over and over again. Would he hate her even more than before? Would he make her life a living hell? Would he take the criticism to heart? Would she be the savior that slew the mighty dragon? She doubted much would change at all as she looked out and sighed, noticing snow had begun to fall from the sky. She threw on her scarf and ratty old jacket and made for her beat-up car, praying it would start in time to take her final shift before Maz closed the diner for Christmas Eve the following day. Rey hurried out the door and almost jumped for joy when her old car started on the first try. “Thank you BB, you rusty little tin can,” she said as she lovingly patted the wheel and carefully drove to the Diner. 

____________________________________________________________________________________ 

Professor Ren thumbed through the final exams that were left in his office by his proctor. He wanted nothing more than to throw every one of them in the trash and leave the prison-like building he was bound to and drown himself in a bottle of the strongest bourbon he could get his hands on, but he thought of his parents and silently cursed to himself, taking a seat at his desk. He put his face in his hands momentarily, then rubbed his eyes and sat up, grabbing a paper at random to begin grading. 

The lumbering man spent several hours hunched uncomfortably over his desk grading mediocre paper after paper before grabbing a particularly crumbled one from the middle of the pile. The essay was surprisingly well written and supported a fairly strong argument about the inequal wealth distribution in France being the main cause of the revolution. It was a tired topic, but the way the student heatedly defended their thesis was refreshing. After making a few minor grammatical corrections, he chuckled to himself as he truly couldn’t find anything wrong with the paper in front of him and he scrawled a sharp A after the last sentence of the essay. He stopped smiling suddenly, however, when he found a short note scribbled on the very last page of the Blue Book. He read it twice before throwing the booklet away from him and angrily stuffing the remaining essays into his bag before slamming his office door and leaving for winter break. 

As he walked to his sleek black sportscar, he scowled up at the sky, snowflakes dusting his raven locks and matching black jacket. After starting his car and making his way off campus, he tried not to think about the note, but the few short sentences were ingrained in his mind by now. 

_Professor Ren. It is clear that you are an expert in your field and an incredibly knowledgeable individual. To have been given the opportunity to teach in_ _Corellia_ _is a wonderful accomplishment, yet it is clear by the way that you treat your students that you are still so profoundly unhappy. I truly hope that one day you find something or someone that brings you joy. Please know that this is coming from a student who only wishes the best for you and who will be sitting in the same seat next semester for French History II. Happy holidays._

_Sincerely,_

_Rey Kenobi_

Instead of taking his usual route home, he stopped at the liquor store next to the diner and picked up several bottles of assorted liquor. “Snow’s gonna be bad,” the cashier said casually as he took Ren’s card and rang him up. “Nor’ester,” he concluded, nodding to the small tv attached to the wall. Professor Ren grimaced as he took his card back and left with his brown paper bags under arm, hearing the bells of the door ring as he made his way to his car. “I hate this fucking state,” he said to himself, unlocking the door and placing the liquor in the back seat. 

He pulled out of the parking lot, passing by the dark Diner, and onto the only road in and out of town. Roughly four inches of snow had settled on the asphalt and he had to drive extra slow in order to avoid losing control of his car. The sun had begun setting as he made the short drive home, and in the poor lighting he almost missed the car sitting on the shoulder of the road, tire tracks in the snow indicating that the driver had lost control. Ren slowed down, considering if he should stop and help or just go home and start drinking in order to drown out this miserable day, when he saw the small form of a woman furiously kicking the front bumper of her car. Knowing his mother, and even his father, raised him better than to leave a woman stranded on the side of the road at night let alone in a snow storm, he pulled over. 

“Are you alright?” he called over to the woman through the passenger side window. “Peachy!” the woman yelled back as she continued kicking her car. “Do you need to call someone?” he asked, rolling his eyes and wanting nothing more than to just be back home sitting on his couch already. “Already did. Thanks,” the woman snapped back as she stopped kicking her dilapidated car and slammed the hood closed, finally making eye contact with the stranger who had stopped to help her. “You!” she gasped in surprise, but started hysterical laughing as Ren began to recognize the familiar face of the overachieving girl who sat in his French History class. “’Miss Kenobi?” he said, realizing the girl who had sent him into a spiral that evening now stood in front of him like a ghost, taunting him from the side of the road. “You have to be kidding me,” he moaned beginning to roll up his window. 

He gripped his steering wheel tightly before regaining his composure and reminding himself that one of his students was stranded on the side of the road during what the news was calling ‘the worst snow storm of the century.’ He rolled the window back down begrudgingly, but Rey had already gotten back into her car and was attempting to start it to no avail. He shook his head, frustrated by the situation, before getting out of his car and carefully walking over to tap on her window. She rolled it down an inch but continued trying to start her car. “What?” she asked angrily as she dropped her head back against the headrest in defeat. 

“Is someone coming to get you?” he asked bluntly, not wanting to stand in the snow any longer dealing with the brat whose note had struck a chord deep within him that he constantly tried to forget about. 

“Yes,” she replied shortly. “Well no. I don’t know when they will get here,” she finally admitted. “I called for a tow, but the dispatcher said he couldn’t guarantee someone would be able to get out to me today, but that he would call me by 8pm with an answer.” 

Ren pinched the bridge of his nose in frustration then checked his watch to see that it was only five and it was becoming abundantly clear that she would freeze to death if he left her out here waiting for the call. “Where do you live? I can drive you home,” he offered reluctantly, leaning both hands against the roof of her car. 

“I live all the way back near campus and I can’t just leave my car here. Plus, how am I supposed to get back here when they call me?” she asked as a single tear streamed down her cheek. Kylo thought for a long moment about what his options were before shaking his head and once more cursing himself for what he was about to offer. 

“I live five minutes away. You can wait there for the call, then I can either drive you back here to meet up with the tow truck or drop you off at home,” he said in a strained voice, not wanting to have to babysit one of his students on the first night of his break, especially not one that had seen through his carefully constructed façade and called him out on it. “Plus, you’re going to freeze out here and I really don’t feel like dealing with you haunting me for the rest of my life,” he added, which made Rey huff and look up at him through her cracked window. 

“Are you sure?” she asked hesitantly. “I can’t imagine you’re my biggest fan right now, assuming you graded my essay,” she added as she looked away. Professor Ren walked away from the car suddenly and opened the passenger door of his car before calling back to her. 

“It would make me less profoundly unhappy if you didn’t die out here in the woods, Miss Kenobi.” 

Ren didn’t wait for a response and left the door open as he circled the front of the car and jumped in the driver seat. 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After offering his least favorite student a ride back to his house to wait for a tow truck, Professor Ren begins to view Rey in a different light.

An ordinarily five-minute car ride turned into a twenty minute one as the snow continued to fall and blanket the dark, windy road back to Ren’s house. When they finally arrived, he parked the car in the garage and hopped out to open Rey’s door for her. 

As they made their way into his laundry room from the garage, he heard Rey let out a huff. “Your laundry room is about as big as my flat,” she joked as she removed her wet shoes and hung up her jacket. Ren rolled his eyes and led them into the kitchen. 

“You must have a big family,” she said as she followed him a careful distance behind. “I live alone,” he responded curtly as he placed the bottles of the alcohol he bought into the freezer and turned to lean against his counter. 

As Rey watched him, he couldn’t help but feel like an alien in his own home. He was suddenly unsure of what to do with his arms or where to stand or what to do. He couldn’t help but feel like the woman who stood before him could see into his very soul and it made him feel incredibly uneasy. 

“Tea,” he suddenly said too loud, startling both himself and Rey. “Would you like some tea? You must be freezing,” he added as he turned on his water kettle. “What kind of a Brit would I be if I said no,” she said smirking, but he could almost detect a hint of insecurity in her voice. 

When he looked back up at Rey, he noticed how uncomfortable she looked standing awkwardly in the middle of the kitchen, and he politely gestured toward one of the bar stools at the island. “Milk and sugar?” he asked as he opened his fridge to take out the milk. “Please,” she said gratefully warming her hands on the mug. 

Glancing up at the clock on the oven, Ren could see that it was 6pm. ‘Two more hours,’ he thought to himself with dread. Ren watched Rey as she sipped her tea, and the two sat for several minutes in an uncomfortable silence, both seemingly unsure of what to say to one another. 

“I have some leftover Chinese I was going to heat up if you’re hungry,” said Ren, finally breaking the tension in the room. Rey’s eyes perked up at the mention of food, but then her expression dropped and she looked down at her tea, politely shaking her head ‘no.’ 

Sensing the moment of hesitation, Ren looked back at Rey over his shoulder and presented several containers of assorted food. “I went a little crazy after the gym yesterday. They gave me five forks. There's plenty,” he added, hoping Rey would feel a little more comfortable about the gesture. She smiled politely and after a moment, she nodded her head and silently accepted his offer. 

____________________________________________________________________________________ 

It was strange seeing her professor in such a domestic setting, especially one that she was also currently occupying. This is the man she had hated all semester long and had written an angry note to that afternoon, but now he was acting so... human. Feeling overwhelmed by his generosity, she apologized for the note. 

“I really am sorry Professor. I hope my note didn’t upset you. It’s just, you’re a brilliant academic, but you always seem so miserable in class. And the way you speak to some of your students is a little...” Rey began, but was interrupted by Professor Ren. “harsh,” he concluded not looking up from the stove he was heating the leftovers on. “Harsh,” Rey agreed hesitantly before continuing. 

“I’m not a history major, by the way. I’m an engineering major, but I chose to take this elective because I've been interested in France for as long as I can remember and its always eye opening to learn about politics and history, etc. But you kind of suck the joy out of it, if I’m being honest,” she said as she sloshed her tea around in her mug. 

Professor Ren didn’t respond as he plated the left overs and presented her with dinner. “Have you always wanted to teach?” Rey asked, breaking up the awkward silence that had again fallen upon the two. “No,” he replied bluntly as he worked on his meal. “What did you want to do?” She asked realizing that she had already scarfed down almost all of her plate before he had even made a dent. “Something else,” he mumbled quietly, refusing to look up at her. 

Taking the hint Rey stopped asking him about his job aspirations and instead focused on slowly eating the rest of her meal. “Do you hate me?” she finally asked, her frustration growing as he refused to acknowledge her presence in his home. Professor Ren looked up at her, then gently placed his fork on the table and wiped his mouth. Rey could help but stare at his plump lips momentarily before quickly averting her gaze and staring at her hands in her lap. 

“If I hated you do you really think I would have offered to bring you into my home to wait for roadside assistance?” he replied quietly staring intently at Rey. She could feel the heat from his stare burning into her and she shifted uncomfortably in her chair. “Okay. Well I'm sorry again if my note upset you. And I really do appreciate your help,” said Rey as she took a deep breath then met his eyes. 

What she saw there, however, wasn’t hatred. Instead his dark eyes seemed almost predatorial and laced with something she couldn’t quite put her finger on. Whatever the look was, it suddenly changed as Professor Ren’s phone began to buzz. 

____________________________________________________________________________________ 

“Excuse me,” he said to Rey as he looked down at the screen and walked away from her and into the living room to take his call. 

“Hux,” he spat as he answered his phone impatiently. 

The fiery redhead on the other end was the head of the history department at Corellia, as well as Ren’s most staunch critic. The man hated him from the moment he was hired, which he believed to have something to do with the fact that his mother had gotten him the job. Knowing Armitage Hux always had a hidden agenda and would never call out of the kindness in his heart he dreaded whatever the man had to say. 

“Good evening Professor Ren, I hope this call finds you well,” the man all but hissed into the receiver. “Never better,” Kylo responded as he sat down on his couch. “Good, good,” replied Hux. “Then I'm sure you will be submitting your final grades as soon as possible, considering the weather will surely have us all snowed in,” he said hastily. 

“My last section just took their finals this afternoon, Hux. My grades will be in by the due date as per university policy,” responded Kylo coolly. He knew his composure would frustrate Hux who had clearly called to get a rise out of him. 

“Yes, however, it’s been the policy of the history department to get grades in a week before the rest of the departments. We pride ourselves in accuracy and expediency. You will have your grades in by tomorrow evening the latest,” Hux replied as his voice rose slightly in frustration. 

“My grades will be in by the due date, Hux. I’m sure if you have any concerns you can take it up with administration. Thank you for calling though. I hope you find something better to do with your night then pester your colleagues. And Happy Holidays!” said Kylo confidently as he hung up before Hux could respond. 

Now fully annoyed the last thing Ren wanted to deal with was his least favorite student sitting in his kitchen. He rested his head on the back of his sofa for a moment before bringing himself to stand and return to his awkward meal with Kenobi. He didn’t look up as he reentered the kitchen and went right back to eating his meal. Several more minutes of silence passed before Rey spoke up and broke the tension. “Excuse me, Professor?” she asked as he looked up to meet her eyes. 

As his gaze raked up her form and settled on her face, Kylo was suddenly hit by how attractive the woman standing in front of him was. She was tall, much shorter than him, but still tall for a girl. She had beautiful sun kissed skin with freckles lightly speckling her nose and the most expressive hazel eyes. 

‘ _Stop_ ,’ he thought suddenly to himself as he quickly averted his gaze and pretended to check the time on the oven. 

“Professor?” Rey asked again, this time sounding slightly confused. 

‘ _Get it together Ren,’_ he silently chastised himself before looking back to Rey. A slight blush had grown on her cheeks and she now looked even more beautiful that he could have imagined. ‘ _She’s your student. Enough!’_ screamed his rational side which succeeded in bringing him back to the present. 

“What?” he shot out, immediately regretting how snippy he sounded. 

“Um, sorry. I was just going to ask you where your garbage was so I could clean up,” she replied, clearly embarrassed by the situation and uncertain as to what she had done. “Cabinet next to the sink,” he stated curtly, again looking down at his plate and ignoring the urge to glance up at the girl. 

____________________________________________________________________________________ 

Rey threw out her napkin and chopsticks and quickly washed her plate in the sink, leaving it on the counter to dry. She quietly returned to her seat at the island and reached into her pocket to check her old half-broken flip phone. 

“I have some work to do. The bathroom is down the hall and to the left. There’s a TV in the living room, as well as some books. I’ll be upstairs. Yell up when you hear from the tow company,” said Professor Ren before he got up and stalked out of the kitchen without cleaning his plate. Rey stared after him, mouth slightly agape, trying to figure out what she had done wrong to bring about this sudden change. When he had offered her a ride home and even some of his food, he had been kind. Almost making her feel bad for writing him that letter. Now, however, he was back to being the Professor Ren she was familiar with from class. “Thanks,” she said sardonically as she pursed her lips in annoyance. 

Once Rey heard Professor Ren march up the stairs and close a far-off door, she made her way into his living room. ‘ _Bloody hell’_ she thought to herself as she scanned the room, taking in the floor to ceiling bookcases that lined the entire perimeter of the space, as well as the luxurious looking black sofa that sat facing a huge plasma television. She had seen similar homes in the pages of Finn’s celebrity magazines, but she couldn’t have imagined she’d ever be in one. 

As she stood surveying the space, she felt self-conscious and unworthy of touching anything in the room. Rey had grown up with nothing, and she had been told she was nothing her entire childhood. Her last foster parent, an untrustworthy old man named Unkur, made sure she knew she would never amount to anything in life, and yet she fought like hell to prove him wrong. ‘ _You belong,”_ she reminded herself. “You are worthy of the life you live,” she whispered as she strode up to the bookshelf closest to her and brushed her fingertips over a leather-bound copy of 1984. 

Rey continued to study her surroundings and learn more about the confusing person she knew to be her professor. His expansive book collection included everything for the classics, to ancient looking history tomes, to graphic novels. Somehow, each book looked worn and like it had been read and re-read making her shake her head in disbelief. “ _There are hundreds of books here,”_ she considered to herself as she lost herself in thought attempting to calculate how long it would theoretically take someone to read all of them. 

A buzz from her pocket brought her back to the current moment and she quickly grabbed her phone to see who was calling. 

**I** **ncoming call: FINN**

Rey let out a huff of frustration when she saw the call wasn’t from the tow company, but she was always happy to hear from her best friend. 

Finn was another engineering major who had begun classes at Corellia the same time that Rey did. Considering they were in the same section, the two saw each other often and quickly hit it off and became fast friends. They especially bonded over the fact that they had both come from relative obscurity and had similar foster care experiences. Something that not many people could relate with. Finn was Rey’s rock and she was his in return. They were there for each other during their best and worst moments and trusted each other completely. 

“Hey Finn,” said Rey as she answered the call. “Sunshine! I didn’t hear from you when you got out of work and I got worried so I thought I'd call. Poe told me I was being needy, but I don’t care. I just wanted to make sure you were okay. It’s crazy out,” he replied with relief. 

Rey let out a small chuckle not knowing where to start, and even more so not wanting to ruin Finn’s first vacation with his boyfriend’s family. “Hi, yeah, I’m okay. I actually had a little car trouble, but everything is fine,” she said hesitantly, trying to hide the anxious tone of her voice. 

“What do you mean, car trouble, Rey?” asked Finn, now sounding much more serious. “Really everything is fine. I’m okay. I’m safe. Pro...” her sentence was cut off by the sound of beeping from the other line as the tow company was finally calling her back. “Finn, I promise everything is okay. The Tow company is on the other line and I have to take this. Go have fun with Poe and relax. I’ll call you tomorrow! Love you both, Bye,” she hurriedly stated into the phone not waiting for his response before she picked up the second call. 

“Hi, this is Rey,” she all but yelled into the receiver. “Uh, hi, Ms. Kenobi. This is Cal from Cal’s Tow Services,” replied a hoarse voice on the other end of the line. 

“Yes, Cal. Thanks for getting back to me. I know the weather is awful, but I can get back to my car in twenty minutes. Just let me know when you’re heading out,” she responded. 

“Uh, yeah Ms. Kenobi. That’s not happening today. Honestly, that’s probably not gonna happen for the next few days, or until this storm passes and the roads are cleared. Plus, my guys have off for the holidays. But I promise that as soon as everything’s looking safe for me and my guys to be out there, you’re on the top of my priority list.” 

Rey sat for a moment in stunned silence, registering what Cal had just dropped on her. “But thanks for choosing Cal’s Towing Services. I’ll be in touch soon. Er, Merry Christmas,” he said as enthusiastically as possible before hanging up the phone. 

‘ _Fuck.’_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! Just a reminder that this fic is and ANGSTY slow burn. Enjoy!


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After receiving news that the tow truck wasn't coming, Rey and Ben attempt to make it back to her apartment before the storm worsens.

After hastily escaping the kitchen and closing himself in his office, Kylo dropped his body into his leather arm chair and rubbed his eyes. He felt bad for being so rude with Rey, but he had to put some distance between the two of them. 

As he sat in his chair with his hands on his face, he attempted to figure out what was going on inside his head and how he was going to solve this. 

_‘When had his disdain for his least favorite student turned into the opposite? Had she always been this attractive? Surely, he would have noticed this about her before tonight. Why was he even thinking about this? Should he have even offered her a ride? Yes, she would have frozen to death otherwise, plus you hated her mere moments prior so it’s not creepy. Wait, I’m being creepy just thinking about this. No, you’re a man and she's a beautiful woman. This is natural. She has to be at least 20, right? That would make her ten years his junior. Yikes. Could she ever be interested in someone like him? Wait. She’s still my student. STOP. Stop thinking about this. Just go back to hating her. You’re being disgusting. This could get you fired. FUCK! Just having her in your apartment could get you fired. No. You were being a good Samaritan. It’s not your fault she’s beautiful!”_

Kylo continued his internal argument for several more minutes, ruminating on the situation at hand and trying to forget the way she had looked when she smiled at him earlier when he had offered her tea. 

“She’s your student. You only have to deal with her for another hour, tops. Go back to hating her and everything will be normal again,” he whispered to himself several times, almost like a mantra. 

He was thrown out of his quasi-meditation when he heard the voice of the very woman he was trying not to think about. “Professor Ren?” she called out from the base of the stairs. He took a moment to breathe deeply before he got up from his chair and clenched his fist painfully before leaving his office and descending the stairs. 

Once at the bottom of the staircase, he came face to face with Rey who was wearing a worried expression. Her concerned look made his heart clench slightly with regret, but he remembered his mission to go back to normal. “What is it?” he asked impatiently, crossing his arms in front of his chest. 

Rey looked like she was now ready to cry, but he closed his eyes for a moment to steel himself once more. “S-sorry to bother you, Professor. It’s just, the Tow Company Called and they’re not coming... until the storm clears and the roads are safe... and probably after Christmas,” she mumbled dejectedly. 

Ren continued to stare at her emotionlessly and then moved back to the kitchen to grab his keys. “I’ll take you home then,” he nearly hissed at her. Rey followed behind him cautiously. 

“Yeah, thanks,” she said as she began pulling her boots back on and making a muddy mess of his laundry room floor. 

____________________________________________________________________________________ 

The two made their way into the garage and Professor Ren took a moment to let the car warm up before pressing his garage door button and waiting for it to rise. Rey buckled her seatbelt and tried to occupy herself by looking out her window and examining the bare wall of the garage. 

“Fuck,” huffed Professor Ren next to her, as he turned the key in his ignition off and quickly jumped out of the car. Rey looked to him confused, then realized that he was walking toward the open garage door with a snow shovel in hand. She unbuckled her seatbelt as well and made her way out of the car to see if she could help dig them out. 

Rey looked around the garage for another shovel, but turned up empty handed. She then watched her professor attempt to make a dent in the now several feet of snow that currently barricaded the driveway before the reality of the situation dawned on her. 

They were stuck. 

As if coming to this realization at the same time, Professor Ren stopped shoveling and dropped his head back for a moment before throwing the shovel against the garage wall. The sound of the shovel hitting the cement floor made Rey wince and she couldn’t help when a stray tear rolled down her cheek. 

Professor Ren stopped in front of her momentarily taking in her current state and clenching his fists before walking past her and back into the house, leaving the door open behind him. Rey was overcome for a moment with frustration and she let a few more tears fall down her cheeks before she wiped them away and accepted the fact that she was now stuck with her asshole professor for god-knows how long. She reminded herself, however, that she could still be stuck on the side of the road, or working in Unkar’s shop, and to be grateful for her current circumstances. 

Rey made her way back into her professor’s house, closing the door behind her and stripping herself of her muddy shoes and old jacket. When she entered the kitchen, the man was nowhere to be seen, but she could hear the sound of the television playing quietly in the living room. She hesitantly followed the sound and found Professor Ren pouring himself a glass of bourbon and intently watching the weather forecast. 

“This is looking to be the storm of the century, ladies and gentleman,” said a handsome older man on the screen as he reported on the storm from outside the news studio. “You can expect at least five to six feet of snow over the next day and a half followed by temperatures dropping close to zero on Thursday. The national weather service urges everyone to stay indoors to avoid these dangerous conditions, and the state of Massachusetts has issued a state of emergency and all travel has been banned until Friday. The Governor has assured us that as soon as it is safe, emergency snow removal will begin. So, stay warm, and enjoy a frigid white Christmas,” concluded the meteorologist a moment before professor Ren muted the TV. 

She watched from the entrance of the living room as her Professor took a long swig of his drink before sitting down on his couch. “You’re allowed in here, Kenobi. No point hiding in the shadows like a frightened little mouse,” he said coolly, not yet looking up at her. 

Rey sneered at the back of Professor Ren’s head, but had to remind herself for a moment that this man had helped her out of a dangerous situation and offered his home to her. Instead of showing him any weakness of anxiety, she decided to stride into the room confidently and take a seat beside him on the couch. 

Her professor stole a glance at her quickly before shifting slightly away from her and crossing his legs. Rey rolled her eyes then shifted her gaze onto the bottle in front of them. “May I?” she asked politely before waiting for a response and grabbing a glass off the nearby bar cart and pouring herself some of the dark liquid. Professor Ren scowled at her before taking another sip of his drink and fixing his eyes back on the muted television screen. 

“Are you even old enough to drink?” he asked while searching for something to watch. Rey scoffed at his remark and finished the rest of her glass before pouring herself another. “I turned 21 on the 4th" she responded curtly, sitting further back onto the couch and bringing her legs up to rest in front of her. 

Professor Ren pressed his lips into a flat line and continued staring blankly at the TV before settling on S _tar Wars: The Empire Strikes back._ “This is the best one,” Rey said quietly as Professor Ren unmuted the TV and poured himself another glass of bourbon. 

_____________________________________________________________________________________ 

“ _Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, FUCK!”_ screamed Kylo internally. Not only was Rey not leaving this evening, they were stuck together for the next several days. 

Attempting to calm his nerves, he poured himself another glass of bourbon and unmuted the TV. ‘ _Just watch the movie and ignore her,’_ he thought to himself as he refused to look over at the girl who was sitting next to him. 

“This is the best one,” he heard her say quietly and it took everything inside of him to not to turn his head. 

‘ _Of course_ _she’s perfect,’_ he thought as he chuckled to himself realizing how cruel the world could truly be _._

_“_ What’s funny?” she asked causing him to finally look over at her. This was a mistake, however, because Rey looked even more attractive than he remembered. She had a slight blush on her cheeks, presumably from the alcohol, and looked so right sitting on his couch watching one of his favorite movies. He hesitated not knowing what to say, as he hadn’t realized she had been watching him. 

“N-nothing,” he said shaking his head and attempting to look as dismissive as possible so as to shut down any further conversation. 

Rey stayed silent for another moment before speaking up. “Look, Professor. I’m sorry that I'm intruding and I am eternally grateful that you helped me out earlier, but you’re the one who insisted on bringing me here. In fact, I’m pretty sure I recall telling you that I was fine. I totally get why your annoyed, but if we’re going to be stuck together for the next couple of days it would help if you could at least pretend not to hate me.” 

Kylo pinched the bridge of his nose in frustration thinking of what to say. He was finding it increasingly difficult to shut Rey out and he certainly would lose his mind if he kept it up for the remainder of the night, let alone for the next few days. He would just have to act like a normal adult and get his shit together. 

“I don’t hate you, Rey,” he finally admitted as he looked over at her. He could see that her eyes were glassy and it looked like she had been about to cry before he had spoken. “I told you before, I wouldn’t have invited you here if I hated you.” 

Rey let out a small huff and attempted to discretely wipe away the tears that were building in her eyes. ‘ _Fuck,”_ he silently chastised himself. “This is just...” he began to say as he passed her a beverage napkin from the coffee table in front of them, but she cut him off as she grateful plucked the napkin from his hand. 

“Weird,” she stated plainly. Kylo couldn’t help but smirk at her response to the situation mostly because he agreed. “Weird,” he concluded. This brought a shy smile to Rey’s face as well and she let out the most beautiful laugh as she blotted her tears with the napkin. 

“I’m still your professor and a situation like this isn’t exactly in the rule books,” he admitted before taking another swig of his drink. “This, for example. Me drinking with a student. It doesn’t say anything about that in the code of conduct, but it still feels... wrong?” 

Rey looked at him now with clear eyes. “Would you feel just as uncomfortable if I was a male student?” she asked, sucking Kylo’s breath from his chest and making him think for a moment. “No,” he finally admitted, seeing no point in lying to her. He looked away from Rey and set his gaze back on the movie that. 

“I’m... I’m sorry if this situation is making you uncomfortable then,” she replied quietly. He could feel her gaze burning into the side of his face. “If it makes you feel any better, we don’t have to mention this to anyone,” she said awkwardly. 

Rey must’ve been able to see Kylo’s fist clench his glass tighter when she quickly clarified her statement. “I mean, you helped me out. If you’re concerned that I’m going to mention to someone that I stayed here for a night or two, I won’t. I just don’t want you to think I’d go tattle on you. I understand what teaching at Corellia means. I wouldn’t try to ruin your career because of rumors or anything. This can stay between us... Thank you again, Professor.” 

Kylo let out a breath he was holding after processing what she had offered. She wasn’t going to rat him out for having her here. So there, problem solved. He should be relieved. But then he looked over at Rey again and his breath caught in his chest once more. 

She was looking over to him with an intensity to her eyes that he hadn’t seen before. Surely, she was just intent on looking sincere in her promise not to throw him to the wolves, but he couldn’t help but feel there was more to her gaze than he realized yet. 

“Kylo... Ben,” he hesitantly said, unable to keep the words from falling out of his mouth. “You can call me...Ben,” he added as Rey’s brows knit together. “Kylo is somewhat of a penname. Ben is my real name. You can call me that if you want. Just here, obviously. Not in class... Please.” ‘ _Shut up. You sound like an idiot.’_ He yelled internally at himself, bringing a hand to his face and rubbing his temple. 

“Ben,” he heard her say as he swallowed and looked back over to the girl who now had a grin plastered onto her face. Kylo couldn’t help himself from blushing from embarrassment and he could almost feel the tips of his ears turning bright red. Luckily, they were tactfully covered by his thick mop of dark hair, or else they would give away how this girl made him feel like an awkward teenager again. 

“Ben,” she repeated again, as she seemed to be testing his name on her tongue. “I like that name. It suits you,” she concluded happily, taking another sip of her drink and turning her attention back to the movie. Kylo couldn’t help the corner of his mouth from turning up in a half smile before he too turned his attention back to the movie. The two sat in companionable silence as they watched the remainder of the film. 

As the credits rolled and Kylo was feeling a comfortable buzz, he finally turned his attention back to Rey. She had fallen asleep some time during the movie and he couldn’t peel his eyes away from her. Rey really was stunning, he thought to himself as he stared. As he gazed longingly at her he couldn’t help but question whether or not she had a boyfriend. “ _Surely she must,”_ he thought to himself. His eyes drifted over her peaceful face and he was instantly jealous of any man who she had ever let touch those lovely cheeks, or perfect nose, or pink lips. “ _Stop!”_ he yelled to himself, once more and he quickly averted his gaze. 

He decided to remove himself from the situation and bring their empty glasses to the kitchen to wash them as well as his plate that he had left there earlier. As he was drying the glasses with a kitchen towel, he heard Rey quietly clear her throat as she entered the kitchen sleepily. “I missed the end of the movie,” she said sheepishly as she came to sit at the kitchen island as he placed the dry glasses on the counter next to him. 

“Lucky for you, you know how it ends,” he replied as he placed his hands on the island between them and leaned on it. Rey smiled in response then politely covered her mouth as she yawned. 

Kylo looked at the clock on the oven which now read 12:30am. “It’s late,” he concluded as he looked back at the woman in front of him. “I can sleep down here, obviously. I just really wouldn’t mind showering first if that’s alright,” she said hesitantly. 

“There’s a guest room upstairs, Rey,” he said not wanting her to feel any more unwelcome than he had earlier. “And even if I didn’t have one, I still wouldn’t make you sleep on the couch,” he added nonchalantly. 

Kylo couldn’t help but notice the slight blush had returned to her cheeks and he turned away from her, quickly leading them both upstairs. He showed her to the guest room which was next to his office. There was a pristinely made queen sized bed as well as an en suite bathroom. “Wow, Ben,” said Rey as she stepped into the room and took a cursory glance at her surroundings. “Do you have guests often?” she asked, turning her attention back to him. 

“Um, no, actually. You’re my first,” he admitted before he could stop himself. “Well I'll be sure to leave you a good review on yelp,” she quipped as Kylo failed at containing a smile by looking up at the ceiling. “Let me go grab you a towel,” he said as he watched Rey walk over to the bed and press gently on the mattress, the blush returning to his ears. 

‘ _Fuck,’_ he thought to himself as he raced out of the room to grab her some toiletries as well. He gathered her an extra bottle of shampoo that he had just bought for himself, as well as some soap, and a towel. Before he returned, however, he also grabbed one of his old black t-shirts and his favorite pair of soccer shorts, figuring she would probably appreciate a change of clothes. She was still wearing her work uniform as it was. 

He hastily made his way back to the guestroom, making sure to knock lightly on the open door before entering. “Come in,” Rey called from the bathroom, and Kylo took a deep breath before entering. “I, uh, brought you some toiletries,” he began to say but was cut off as Rey came out of the bathroom with her hair down and face flushed from having just rinsed it in the sink. He felt every muscle in his body tense as he watched her approach him, noticing how her hair beautifully framed her face and brushed just below her small shoulders. 

“Ben?” she questioned with a small grin as he fumbled for what to say. “Hi, yes sorry. I’m just glad you... found the bathroom okay...” he babbled at her, hoping she couldn’t sense how wildly attracted he currently was to her. “You mean the bathroom that’s connected to this room... the one you pointed out earlier?” she said teasingly as she walked over to him and grabbed the handful of supplies from him gratefully. 

“Yeah,” he said as he furrowed his brows in embarrassment. “I also brought you a change of clothes, in case you wanted one. They’re mine, so they will probably be big on you, but I can say with confidence that they are outstandingly comfortable,” he joked, trying to show Rey that he wasn’t a complete bumbling idiot. 

To his relief, Rey let out a solid chuckle as she looked back at him. “Thank you, Ben. I really do appreciate everything you’ve done for me today... and tomorrow... and maybe the next day,” she said as she beamed up at him with a smile that lit the room. 

Kylo couldn’t help but smile back at her, as her positivity was infectious. “If you need anything, I'm the last door on the left. Goodnight, Kenobi,” he said quietly as he turned to leave the room. 

“Goodnight, Ben,” he heard her call after him. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading, dudes and dudettes! Will these two learn to actually tolerate each other, or will Professor Ren continue to short-circuit in the mere presence of his student?


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey and Professor Ren are stuck together during the blizzard of the century. Cue mutual pining.

Rey reveled in the feeling of the hot water cascading over her body as she stood in the large shower of the guestroom. She was so used to the lukewarm drizzle of her apartments shower that this felt like a luxurious treat. 

As she began washing her hair with the shampoo that Ben had provided her, she was suddenly overcome by the familiar scent. ‘ _ It smells like him,’ _ she thought to herself as she worked up a lather, scrubbing all of the grease and grime from working at the  diner out of her hair. ‘ _ I smell like him,’ _ she reiterated as she let the water wash the bubbles from her hair. 

Her mind couldn’t help but drift to her professor, and she began to think about his thick dark hair and the way it always looked casually messy yet meticulously so. Her thoughts then wandered to his face. When she had first met Professor Ren the first  thing she had noticed about him, aside from his height of course, was his unusual face. His features all seemed slightly too big for him, and yet they somehow came together perfectly, resulting in him being undeniably attractive. 

Having spent more time than normal with him, she had also begun to notice the smattering of beauty marks that littered his face, and how they too added to his rugged handsomeness. She also noticed the way his firmly muscled arms had strained against his shirt sleeves when he leaned against the kitchen island earlier. 

Rey opened the bar of soap her professor had given her and began washing her body, subconsciously rubbing her hands over her breasts as her thoughts were drawn to his large hands. Rey thought about the way his eyes had darkened when he looked at her earlier in the evening and how he had later admitted to being uncomfortable about the situation because she was a female student. Did that mean that he had thought of her the way that she was thinking about him now? Surely, he wouldn’t have felt uncomfortable if he wasn’t at least a little bit attracted to her, she thought to herself as her fingers brushed over her sensitive nipples and she let out a quiet “oh.”

‘ _ Wait stop,” _ she thought to herself as she attempted to bring herself back to the reality of the situation. ‘ _ He’s still your professor, Rey. This is inappropriate. He could lose his job and you could lose your scholarship. Plus, who would honestly be attracted to a skinny little orphan like you?’ _ she reminded herself as she rinsed off her body and quickly turned off the shower. 

She took a moment to take in her reflection in the mirror before wrapping herself in a towel. ‘ _ Too skinny. Small tits. No curves,’  _ she reminded herself of what a boy she had once had crush on in high school told his friends about her. She fought back tears as she began to dry her hair and she made her way out of the bathroom to get changed. 

Rey hastily threw her professor’s shirt over her naked torso then slid on his oversized soccer shorts, having to roll them a few times at the waist to keep them at a reasonable height. ‘ _ This smells like him too,’ _ she thought to herself again, this time trying to shake the thought from her head. She didn’t have much time to think before the shorts started to uncomfortably slide off of her small frame. She tried to pull them up again, but found it was of no use and decided to rid herself of the unnecessary layer. The T-shirt Professor Ren had given gave her ample coverage, the hem falling mid-thigh. 

Before tucking herself into bed, Rey brushed her teeth with the toothbrush that Professor Ren had given her, then she gently raked her fingers through her hair to comb out any knots. She finally set her phone on the nightstand beside her and climbed into bed, wrapping herself in the thick down comforter that was draped over the bed.

Rey quickly drifted off into the most comfortable sleep she had ever had.

_____________________________________________________________________________________

Kylo tossed and turned all night, unable to take his mind off of the girl down the hall. The way that she had smiled at him like he truly mattered for once. The way she looked so naturally beautiful when she walked out of the bathroom with her hair down. The way that he imagined her face would look like after he made her cum. 

‘ _ Fuck,’  _ he groaned to himself, realizing he was utterly hopeless. He rolled over onto his stomach, pressing his face into his pillow and trying to ignore how hard he had been since he had left her room.

Kylo spent the next serval hours rolling around his bed uncomfortably before he eventually gave up and took himself in his hand, attempting to ease his misery. He came quickly into a tissue feeling almost no emotion knowing that this wasn’t what his mind and body truly begged for.

At 6:30am he eventually gave up trying to sleep and got up to take a shower. He tried to empty his mind as he felt the hot water roll down himself, but his thoughts kept going back to Rey.

‘ _ You really need to stop,’ _ he thought to himself. ‘ _ She’s not interested in you. You’re an ugly, creepy, old dude whose weirdly into one of his students. Stop,’ _ he attempted to reason with himself before getting out of the shower and looking at himself in the mirror. ‘ _ Pathetic,’ _ he heard echo in the depths of his head. A word that his former boss used to love to call him. 

He shook his head not wanting to go back to that right now, and instead brushed his teeth and threw on  a black thermal shirt and matching sweatpants . Before heading downstairs, he also grabbed a hoodie and threw it on over his shirt, then quietly made his way down the hallway and to the kitchen. 

Once down there, he brewed a pot of coffee and took some eggs and bacon out of the fridge. He wasn’t sure what Rey liked to eat but he was hungry and decided to scramble some eggs and fry up a heaping pile of bacon. 

Just as he was putting the bacon on a plate, he heard a quiet shuffle behind him as Rey entered the kitchen. “Good morning,” she chirped brightly as he turned around to face her with a plate of bacon in his hands. A plate that he almost dropped when he took in the sight of her standing across from him looking effortlessly beautiful. Her hair was down around here face again and her arms were crossed in front of her body. He noticed she was wearing his black t-shirt and as his eyes rolled over her, he almost choked when he saw that she wasn’t wearing the shorts that he had left for her.

Her tan legs were long and beautifully sculpted. It was clear that she was fit and he couldn’t help but think about how the rest of her might look. Rey uncrossed her chest and made her way over to the island to take a seat. It was then that he couldn’t help but notice her hard nipples straining against the thin fabric of his shirt.  Kylo’s mind went blank as he took a deep breath and swallowed before turning around abruptly and saying “coffee?” He hoped she couldn’t hear the desperation in his voice as he grabbed two mugs from the cabinet. 

“Please,” she said through a mouthful of bacon bringing him back to reality for a moment and making him smile. He placed the mugs on the island between them and busied himself by grabbing milk and sugar. When he turned back around Rey was smiling brightly up at him as she made quick work of another piece of bacon. 

He grabbed a piece as well and tried in vain not to stare down at her chest again. As he snuck another peak, Rey moved to grab the cup of coffee and held it in her hands, clearly savoring the warmth. ‘ _ She’s freezing you idiot,’ _ he chastised himself before hastily stripping off his hoodie and holding it out to her. “I keep my house cold. I forgot people don’t normally appreciate tundra-like temperatures.”

Rey placed her coffee mug down and hesitated before taking the piece of clothing from his hands. “T-thank you,” she finally said as she pulled the sweatshirt over her head. “Oh wow, this is so much better, “she reiterated as she closed her eyes  happily then grabbed her mug again and took a sip.

“I grew up in New Mexico,” she added, placing her mug down on the island and eying the plate of bacon patiently. “The bacon is for you, Rey. Help yourself.  Oh and these too,” he replied, putting some scrambled eggs on a plate and placing it in front of her with a fork. Rey happily dove into the eggs and ate another few slices of bacon as  Kylo sipped his coffee.

“With an accent like yours I would’ve thought you grew up in London,” he pointed out as Rey continued to eat. She looked up at him for a moment and slowed her movements as if reminding herself to eat less feverishly. “It’s a long story,” she replied, moving the eggs  around on her plate with her fork. 

“Rey, eat. This is seriously all for you. I don’t even eat breakfast,”  Kylo urged as he noticed she had become more hesitant to finish her meal. “Want some toast?” he offered before turning around and grabbing some bread to pop into the toaster. Rey laughed and nodded without saying anything, going back to work on her breakfast. 

“I was in the system. My parents... left me outside of a pub when I was four and never came back to find me,” she began to say quietly.  Kylo tensed up at the thought of anyone leaving her, or any child for that matter, alone and scared on the street to fend for themselves. “I heard they were drug addicts, or drunks, or something. I think they’re most likely dead now,” she added. 

“I’m sorry, Rey. I didn’t mean to pry,” said  Kylo apologetically, bringing a handful of toast to the table and throwing it down on her plate  quickly as it had begun burning his hands. “Such service,” she joked, smiling up at him and ignoring his apology.

“Eventually, they sent me to the United States to live with a distant relative in New Mexico. But he died and I was put back into the system and moved around a bunch until I aged out. I spent my last few years living in... not the best situation. But now that I'm legally an adult, I never have to see him or go back to New Mexico ever again,” she stated  matter of  factly .

Kylo felt rage beginning to flow through him. Not only had Rey been abandoned by her own parents, but someone had treated her so poorly that she swore never to see him again. 

“If he laid a hand on you...” he began to say before Rey cut him off. “I’m not as helpless as I look, Professor,” Rey assured him, but  Kylo was still upset about the situation. “Just forget I mentioned it. You look like you’re about to punch a wall,” She said, bringing him back to reality and causing him to unclench the fist he didn’t realized he had tightened.

“I appreciate you being upset about that... asshole. But it’s in the past. It’s nothing,” she added.  Kylo’s eyes met Rey’s as they darkened for a moment. “It’s not nothing Rey. You’re not nothing,” he said before he could stop himself. He looked away then and grabbed a piece of toast, attempting to distract himself. 

“Th-thank you, Ben. No one... well no one has even told me that before,” she said quietly, eyes still burning into him. 

“That’s a damn shame,” he said confidently as he walked out of the kitchen and took a seat in the living room, leaving Rey to finish her breakfast in silence.

____________________________________________________________________________________

Rey sat speechless, alone in Professor Ren’s kitchen thinking about what had just transpired. For one she couldn’t believe she had actually opened up to him about her past. It took her months to do so with Finn and he was someone who had come from a similar background. And two, she was surprised at how upset her story had made him. Specifically, the part about  Unkar being rough with her. ‘ _ Anyone would be bothered by hearing an underprivileged orphan’s sob story,’  _ she thought to herself. But then she considered the look in Professor Ren’s eyes when she told him that no one had ever told her she meant something in this world. His eyes had gone dark again and she remembered a similar look the night before when he was watching her in the kitchen. The look was intense and there was something behind it that she couldn’t put her finger on.

Rey finished the rest of her breakfast then found a Tupperware to wrap the rest of the bacon for later. She cleaned the pan he had used to make her the meal, as well as her plate and utensils. For a moment she thought it was strange that he didn’t have a drying rack, but then she noticed his pristine looking dishwasher. “Oh, of course,” she mumbled to herself remembering that rich people didn’t even have to do their own dishes.

She made her way out to the living room with her coffee mug and took a seat next to Professor Ren as he sat watching the local news. 

“The snow is still coming down, ladies and gentleman, and it looks like it will continue to accumulate until late tonight. Good thing Santa has his magic sleigh and Rudolph to guide him!” the meteorologist quipped in front of a green screen projecting the weekly  forecast .

“It’s Christmas Eve!” Rey said loudly as she suddenly remembered the date. She thought about her tiny little Christmas tree back home, and the presents for Finn, Poe, and Maz that she had wrapped in  newspaper sitting beneath it. She then remembered that she was stuck in her professor’s home,  forcing them to spend the holiday together as opposed to with their families. 

“I’m sorry, Ben. I hope I didn’t mess up your holiday plans,” she said sincerely looking over at the man sitting next to her on the couch. He took a sip of his coffee then huffed before looking over at her. “You didn’t bring about the weather, Rey,” he said in a cool velvety voice. ‘ _ Has his voice always sounded like this?’  _ she considered for a moment before he added, “plus I'm Jewish. Well, half-Jewish, I guess. Either way I don’t really celebrate anything. And I definitely didn’t have any plans with my family.”

“Oh,” said Rey in surprise. “I didn’t realize you weren’t close with your family,” she added. She watched as  Kylo’s eyes drifted away from her face and down to his hands on his coffee mug. “Um, yeah. It’s a story for another time, perhaps,” he finally said, reluctant to lift his gaze to hers. “But you’ve actually met my mom, I'm sure,” he said rolling his eyes then looking back to the TV. 

Rey furrowed her brows in confusion and tried to search her mind and figure out where she could possibly have met the mother of the behemoth man next to her, but then she remembered what one of her classmates had mentioned about him being the son of Chancellor Organa. “Oh!” she exclaimed, finally putting the pieces together. “I haven’t actually met her. But someone mentioned it in passing the other day.”

“People love to talk,” he said as his face fell again and he looked away from her. “I think it’s nice,” she chirped up, trying to see the light in his eyes come back. “It’s nice that you get to see your mom whenever you want. I wish I...” she began but he cut her off again. “’Mother’ isn’t exactly the first word I would use to describe her,” he said with finality before getting off the couch and gently tossing the remote next to her. “I’ve got some work to do upstairs. Do whatever you want to do,” he said as he crossed the room to the stairs. 

“Wait,” called Rey, surprising herself by doing so. ‘ _ What are you doing? Stop!’ _ She silently yelled. “Do you need help? I’ve got nothing else to do. I’d be happy to help you grade or something?” she offered. Professor Ren hesitated before looking back at her, mulling over her proposition for a moment. “I. Um. No. Thank you, Rey. I like to grade my student’s work personally. It helps me to really see if I’m reaching them or not,” he said politely. Rey’s face fell in response to the rejection, but Professor Ren added, “Plus sometimes they like to leave me little notes.”

Her professor smirked at her before taking the steps two by two and Rey could help but question if he had been flirting with her or not. 

_____________________________________________________________________________________

‘ _ Damnit! You should absolutely NOT be flirting with her!”  _ thought  Kylo as he internally scolded himself. 

He bounded up the stairs as quickly as possible to put  distance between him and his student. Once upstairs he  shut himself in his office and logged into his work email to see if Hux had continued his harassment electronically. 

Much to his contentment the Chancellor had sent out a school wide email extending grading dates back another week due to the weather and possible network connectivity problems. Hux didn’t have the authority to overrule a decision made by the chancellor and thus,  Kylo wished he could have seen the smug little assholes face when he received this email. He chortled to himself before logging off and he busied himself with grading his students’ final papers. 

Kylo worked for  several hours before he started to grow hungry, as well as wonder what Rey had been up to while he wasn’t around. He decided to quickly jot down his students' scores in his gradebook before making his way back downstairs. Before he was able to do so, however, he found himself suddenly sitting in complete darkness. 

‘ _ Crap,’  _ he thought as he got up to locate the emergency  flashlight he always kept in his work bag. “Hey, Ben?” he heard Rey call from below, finding his flashlight and igniting it. “Just stay where you are. I’ll be down in a second,” he called back in the most reassuring voice he could muster.

He carefully made his way down the stairs to find Rey standing in the middle of the living room with her arms out in front of her. “ Oh thank god,” she mumbled as she hurried over to  Kylo , brushing her body up against his and putting a hand on his arm for support. “I couldn’t see anything down here, and this house is so big that I started getting freaked out,” she admitted, her voice sounding a touch shakier than normal. “It’s just the storm. I have another flashlight in the kitchen, and I think I might have some candles somewhere around here,” he replied as he led them to the kitchen slowly.

After digging around in a junk drawer, he finally recovered a second flashlight and handed it over to Rey. “Thanks,” she said awkwardly pulling her arm back from his and taking a step away from him. He instantly missed her touch and the small space between them now felt like a mile. “Sure,” he said as he walked over to a storage closet and found several candles and some matches. He lit the candles, placing one in the kitchen and the rest throughout the main living areas of the house. 

“The internets out too,” mentioned Rey as she followed him around like a lost puppy. “How is it so dark already? It’s only 3,” she added curiously.  Kylo stopped in his tracks and considered Rey’s question. He then went over to one of his large windows and saw that the snow had now reached about five feet high and was blocking out the dwindling light outside. “Wow,” he said stepping back and looking at Rey. “It seems the weather man was right  after all ,” he added with a shrug. “I’m going to make a fire. Did you eat yet?” he asked, crossing the room and beginning to gather supplies.

Rey continued to follow  him. “Yeah, sorry. I had the rest of the bacon and some bread. I was starving,” she responded sheepishly.  Kylo looked up at her from the fireplace and grinned. “Stop apologizing for eating, Rey. If you get hungry just ask and I’ll make you something more substantial,” he quipped before turning his attention back to the fire. “Thanks,” said Rey as she took a seat next to him and watched him work. 

Eventually  Kylo built a blazing fire and the two sat before it warming their hands. “Well this is cozy,” Rey chirped. Ren looked over at her and let out a low laugh. “I guess it is,” he added, taking in how beautiful Rey looked in the fire light. He didn’t realize he had been staring, however, until Rey said “what? Tell me there’s not something on my face.”

Thankful for the fire to hide his obviously blush,  Kylo quickly averted his eyes away from Rey and shook his head. “Nothing, Kenobi,” he responded as confidently as possible, brushing his hand through his hair and continuing to look at the fire. He could once again feel Rey’s stare burning into him, but he tried his best to ignore her until the growling of her stomach caused him to look back at her and grin. “Let’s get you a proper snack,” he said as he rose to his feet and offered her his hand to help her up.

As soon as she gripped his hand in hers, he knew that he had made a mistake. The two stared at each other for a long moment, hands still clasped.  Kylo wondered if Rey could feel the same connection he was feeling, but his train of thought was broken again by her grumbling stomach. Rey quickly pulled her hand away from his and crossed her arms over her middle, clearly embarrassed by her body’s demands. 

Kylo just smirked and led them back into the kitchen where he prepared them turkey sandwiches, figuring they should start to eat the  expirable items first. “Hopefully the power comes back on soon,” piped Rey through mouthful of her sandwich. “Or we’ll be rationing the canned goods and eating them over the fire like apocalypse survivors,” she joked.

Kylo took a big bite of his sandwich, and chuckled. “Sounds like you know a thing or two about survival, Kenobi. I think I’d trust you if the world was ending,” he responded causing Rey’s cheeks to become stained pink.

“I do know a thing or two about surviving actually. That’s what happens when your legal guardian forgets to feed you for weeks at a time,” she smiled uneasily.  Kylo immediately felt guilty, having forgotten for a moment that the magnificent girl in front of him had lived such a difficult life before attending  Corellia . “Rey,” he started but she cut him off. “That wasn’t meant as a pity thing. I just completely agree with you. I would do exceptionally well in the apocalypse. You might just have to teach me how to start a fire,” she smiled brightly at him again. “Deal.”

After the two sat in comfortable silence for the rest of their meal, and  Kylo cleaned up, they headed back into the living room and sat next to each other on the couch. “So, what now?” Rey asked innocently, but the question immediately shot to  Kylo’s core and he could feel himself hardening at the thought of being stuck alone with Rey with nothing to distract them from each other's bodies. He quickly moved to grab a pillow and position it as strategically as possible without being completely conspicuous. “Um,” he said. His voice cracking like a teenage boy’s and causing Rey to smile widely at him. “Do you have any cards? I play a pretty mean game of poker,” she added and smiled at him confidently. 

____________________________________________________________________________________

After agreeing on playing blackjack, the two sat for the next couple of hours laughing and insisting that the other must be cheating. It became apparent that both were competitive, but neither truly cared if the other won. “You know, I usually sweep up the competition, Professor,” said Rey through a smile. “But is seems as though I’ve finally met my match.”

Professor Ren grinned back at her as he casually said black jack, causing Rey to dramatically fall backwards against the couch cushion. “You have got to be kidding me!” she groaned as the man before her also leaned back and put his hands behind his head with an air of superiority. Rey took a moment to take in the sight of him, eyes closed, muscular arms flexed, and firm long body lying casually beside her before throwing a pillow at his face and feigning  disappointment .

“Real sportsmanlike, Kenobi,” hissed Professor Ren, feigning venom behind his words. The two then sat again in silence just smiling contently next to one another. “What now?” he asked in a low voice, bringing Rey out of her momentary stupor. His tone did something to her insides and she immediately felt heat beginning to rise in her cheeks. She quickly checked her phone and saw that is now 5:30pm. “For once I’m not actually hungry,” she laughed thinking about what she should recommend they do that didn’t involves ripping one another's clothes off. “Do you have any more bourbon?” she then asked remembering the bottles that he had brought in with them when she arrived. 

Kylo smirked then got up and returned with the half empty bottle from the night before. “I’ve got some others if we make it through this,” he said as he handed her a glass with an ice cube and poured her some bourbon. “Thank you,” she said politely before waiting to cheers him and taking a sip. They sat again in companionable silence for several minutes just listening to the fire. Again, Rey found herself stealing glances at the man beside her and wishing that they had met somewhere aside from  Corellia . When he had offered her his hand earlier, she could swear that something passed between them. As much as she tried to deny her feelings for him, they kept bubbling up to the surface.

“Want to play a drinking game?” he suddenly asked, breaking the silence in the room. This question caught Rey off guard due to the fact that it was her professor asking it and because Ben didn’t exactly seem like the frat boy type. “I’m not a total loser, Rey. I’ve been to college parties before,” he added as she smiled back at him. “ Sure you have, Ben,” she teased before offering that they play ‘Never Have I Ever.’ “Fine,” he agreed. “You go first,” he added.

“Fine,” She responded coyly. Rey thought for a moment before deciding on “never have I ever... dyed my hair.”  Kylo looked at her for a long while before begrudgingly taking a swig of his drink. “Shut up, you did not!” she laughed at him, genuinely surprised by his answer. “Being scene was a thing when I was in high school, okay. My hair wasn’t always this dark so I dyed it black once and looked like an absolute idiot,” he admitted reluctantly causing Rey to belly laugh. “Wow, this was a great idea,” she said before gathering herself and waiting for his question. Professor Ren narrowed his eyes at her before saying “never have I ever cheated on a test.”

Rey confidently sat before her Professor refusing to budge. “Nice try Narc,” she said in response causing her Professor to then let out a solid laugh. The sound of which was music to her ears and caused her to chuckle as well. “It was worth a shot,” he admitted with defeat. Rey scrunched her nose at him then said “never have I ever broken a bone,” and waited for Professor Ren’s response. This time he didn’t even wait before taking a sip of his drink. “I punched a wall once and broke several bones in my hand, “he admitted while taking a sip. Rey swallowed then worked up the courage to ask why. “Um,” Professor Ren began. “After... after my dad  died, I had a lot of personal issues I needed to work through,” he answered as carefully as possible. 

Fearing that he would shut down on her again, Rey quickly apologized. “I didn’t realize,” she began, but  Kylo cut her off. “Never have I ever stolen anything,” he asked in a low voice. Rey pursed her lips then drank. “I already told you my guardian didn’t feed me for weeks on end. That one wasn’t fair, you already knew the answer,” she responded with annoyance, refusing to drink. “Fine,” said Professor Ren. “Never have I ever broken something... at a  friends house and not told them.”

Rey laughed loudly at his question thinking immediately to the little stone sculpture she had hit off the counter in his guest bathroom earlier. She took a drink. “Funny you should ask, actually,” she began and  Kylo let out another genuine laugh. “I knew it was too quiet down here while I was working!” he said in feigned exasperation. Rey went to explain what she had broken, but  Kylo reassured her that he didn’t care. “Break whatever you’d like, Kenobi,” he added as he took another sip of his drink. “You’re turn,” he reminded her.

Rey took in the sight of her professor again, this time feeling noticeable wetness gathering at her core. He was so beautiful when he smiled, and the way his body rested on the couch beside her was driving her insane. Before she could stop  herself she said “never have I ever been on a date.”  Kylo looked up at her suddenly, his eyes examining her face for a moment before taking a sip of his drink. “It was a long time ago,” he added almost reassuringly. Rey couldn’t help but feel a sense of relief wash over her before thinking to herself that she had no right to be thinking about her professor like this to begin with. Her thought process was suddenly derailed when Professor Ren looked at her and said “never have I ever had a  one-night stand.” 

All the breath in Rey’s lungs left her as she sat thinking about what her professor had just asked her. ‘ _ He is absolutely flirting with you,’ _ she concluded with near certainty.  _ ‘Or maybe he’s just drunk. People say and do stupid things all the time when they're drunk,’  _ she countered her own argument. Either way, she didn’t drink. Rey had never had a one-night stand because she had never wanted to be with anyone. She hadn’t even been kissed. When she met her professor’s gaze again, the dark look that she had seen earlier was back. She also got the sense that he looked relieved, almost. As quickly as it had come, however, the look was gone and he was once again averting his eyes from her. “That was inappropriate, Rey. I’m sorry,” he muttered quietly. Clearly embarrassed by what he had said.

Rey looked back at him and smiled, before saying “it’s just part of the game, Professor.” At the mention of his title she noticed his hand tighten around his glass before she decided to change the subject and offered to get him another ice cube for his drink. “They’re all going to melt anyway,” she said as she got up and brought their glasses to the kitchen. Once in there she leaned her  back against the island for a moment and tried to steady herself before grabbing ice and returning to the living room. 

Rey offered a blackjack rematch and Professor Ren happily took her up on the offer. By the end of their tenth round, they were both properly drunk and had ended up sitting in front of the fire. “Read to me,” Rey smiled to Ben sweetly as they sat together. Professor Ren immediately got up and grabbed some pillows and a blanket from the couch, as well as a book from the shelf before rejoining Rey. They both giddily tucked themselves under the blanket and ben adopted his haughty professor voice as he began to read The Fellowship of the Ring. “ Elevensies !” Rey exclaimed loudly as she laughed to herself and laid down on one of the pillows that Professor Ren had gathered and closed her eyes, listening to the deep lullaby of his voice. 

Rey couldn’t have stayed up for more than ten minutes, as the warmth of the fire and the sound of Ben’s voice were overwhelmingly comforting. She did wake up at some point during the night huddled against her Professor’s side, only slightly aware of the heavy arm that was draped over her body protectively. She smiled into the warmth of the man beside her and fell  q uickly back to sleep. 

____________________________________________________________________________________

Kylo woke up with a start as he felt his bed shifting beneath him. He opened his eyes widely and was immediately disoriented. He surveyed his dark surroundings only to realize that he wasn’t actually in his bed at all. Instead, he was still on the floor of his living room and the movement he had felt was Rey’s body pressed firmly against him in a little spoon position, his arms still wrapped around her. As he began to quietly lift his arm, Rey let out a little whimper and she turned her body so that she was now breathing against his chest.

As much as  Kylo began to panic, he couldn’t help but think about how right it felt to be wrapped up with the girl beside him. And he couldn’t ignore the fact that it seemed as though Rey was content with this as well. He decided then to be selfish and he let his  head fall back down to his pillow and he wrapped his arm back around Rey, bringing her closer to him. 

When  Kylo awoke again, he was laying by himself on his living room floor with Rey nowhere in sight. ‘ _ This was a mistake,’ _ he immediately thought to himself, panic once again rising up in his throat. He sat up swiftly and regretted the motion as his head began to throb and he was reminded of how drunk he had been the night before. “We probably should have some water before we fell asleep,” he heard a familiar but groggy voice say as Rey made her way down the stairs and tossed him a bottle of  T ylenol she had been holding. She continued on to the kitchen and grabbed them both a glass of water before returning to sit next to him.

“Thanks,” he said as he took several pills and downed the glass of water Rey had brought him. “Merry Christmas,” she deadpanned.  Kylo groaned and laid back down on his back, bringing his forearms to cover his eyes. Feeling the urge to apologize for how he had acted during their game as well as the fact that he had been wrapped around her the entire night  Kylo began to say “Rey,” but she cut him off. 

“I had a great time, Ben. Please don’t ruin it,” she said. He lowered his arm slightly so he could look up at her and when his eyes met her face, she smiled. He was shocked. He had somehow not ruined the situation. It seemed quite the opposite actually. Now fully confused by the girl beside him and also becoming uncomfortably hard, Ren rolled over onto his stomach with a groan.

“Do you like pancakes?” Rey asked brightly as he heard her getting up from beside him and moving toward the kitchen. “I’m not a monster,” he grumbled into the pillow eliciting a laugh from the kitchen. Ren stayed on the floor for several more minutes, waiting for his body to calm down before he got up and threw the pillows and the blanket back on the couch. 

When he made it into the kitchen, he noticed that Rey had a pot of coffee going as she was messily making breakfast. “The power is back,” she said as he took a seat at the island and watched her. Rey was chaos and beauty all at once. There was an organized madness to the way she worked, but  Kylo was absolutely mesmerized. “I promise I’ll have a tidy afterwards,” Rey reassured him as she served him up a plate of oddly shaped, but delicious looking pancakes. He rolled his eyes teasingly and grabbed syrup and coffee before returning to his seat and making quick work of his breakfast. 

“These are delicious, Rey. Thank you,” he said politely as he finished the meal. The truth was, they really were exceptional. It seemed unfair for anyone to be this good at so many different things. Rey beamed at the compliment and sat beside him happily eating her breakfast. 

The two spent the morning cleaning the kitchen together then watching the news and a Christmas Story in the living room. Around mid-morning  Kylo showered and got some grading done in his office, leaving Rey to entertain herself once again. A few hours later he could smell something cooking and he wandered down to find Rey making them both grilled cheese sandwiches. “If I had known you could cook this whole time, I would’ve put you to work earlier,” he joked as he stood in the entrance of the kitchen watching her.

Rey spun around to look at him and smiled. “I don’t know how this is going to affect your Yelp review, but I’m happy to cook,” she quipped.  Kylo laughed and joined her for lunch insisting repeatedly that she didn’t actually have to cook for him.

After they finished, they again cleaned the kitchen together. Rey cleaned the pans in the sink and Kylo worked on filling the dishwasher. As he passed by her, he unintentionally reached out to her and placed his hand on her lower back. As soon as his hand made contact with her, he jumped back as if he had been burned. ‘ _ Fuck. You have to stop,’ _ he chastised himself yet again as he began to retreat from the kitchen hastily. 

Kylo took a seat on the couch and rubbed his temples. ‘ _ She’s still your student. This is wrong. She doesn’t want this,” _ he tried to remind himself. As he sat with his eyes closed,  thumbing his temples Rey came up behind him and put her small hands on his shoulders and squeezed firmly. “We slept wrapped up together last night. You’re allowed touch me, Ben,” she said in a reassuring voice. 

Her words went straight toward his cock.  Kylo tensed under Rey’s touch and she let go, sitting next to him on the couch and grabbing the remote leaving  Kylo gaping,  trying to decode the true meaning of her words. 

Eventually Rey wandered upstairs to take a shower,  and  Kylo was left  alone with his thoughts. ’ _ Did she really mean that I can touch her. Does she want me touch her? Is she actually interested in me?”  _ He considered as  his mind  whirled like a tornado. ‘ _ This is still wrong. You could get fired. Rey could lose her scholarship. She’s still your student.’  _ Kylo tried to convince himself but it was to no end.

“Fuck it,” he mumbled in finality as he got up and headed toward the kitchen.

_____________________________________________________________________________________

Rey couldn’t believe how forward she had been with Professor Ren earlier, but the way he had jumped away from her after laying a hand on her back just seemed ridiculous. They had basically spooned the entire night prior and yet he was still apprehensive to touch her. She had simply been attempting to reassure him, she thought to herself. ‘ _ But what if he wanted to really touch you?’  _ She considered for a moment, her cheeks going red as she dried her hair in the bathroom mirror. 

‘ _ No,’ _ She scolded herself again. ‘ _ Too many consequences,’  _ she concluded. 

With that Rey changed into a new shirt that Professor Ren had provided, as well as her underthings and Ben’s hoodie. Her stomach began to growl so she made her way back downstairs.

She was confused for a moment when she noticed that the living room was dark again, the only noticeable light coming from one of the candles they had found the night before. “Professor?” Rey called out. “Did we lose power again? On Christmas of all days?” She added, making her way toward the kitchen. 

Just then Professor Ren almost ran into her as he entered the living room. “Oh, Hey. Sorry,” he mumbled, stepping back. “We still have power, I just, um... just follow me,” he said in an uncharacteristically nervous voice. Rey furrowed her brows in confusion but began to follow him to a room she hadn’t yet seen. “I really hope this isn’t the part where you’ve gone mad from the snow and try to murder me. I’ll have you know I can put up a pretty good fi...” Rey began but was cut off by the scene in front of her.

Professor Ren had led Rey to what appeared to be his dining room. It was modern and beautiful, matching the design of the rest of the house, but what was most breathtaking was the fact that the table had been set up with place settings, food, wine, and candles. “What’s this about?” Rey asked with a questioning grin as she met Ben’s eyes across the table.

“Well, you said you’ve never been on a date,” he began and Rey’s eyes went wide in surprise. ‘ _ He IS interested!’  _ she screamed internally. Her stomach filling with  butterflies and her head feeling a bit dizzy. 

_ “ _ I just wanted to show you how someone should treat you... in the future,” he added and her heart broke a little bit but at the same time she was truly moved by the gesture. “There are some really shitty people out there, and if they don’t pull out all the stops then they aren’t worth your time, Kenobi,” mumbled Ben as he pulled out her chair for her and waited for her to take a seat.

‘ _ But what if the person I'm interested in is you?’  _ she thought to herself glumly as she took a seat and smiled politely at her professor. “Lucky for you, I had some frozen chicken and broccoli that thawed beautifully when we lost power last night. I also made some rice. I know it’s lame, but I’m working with what I had,” he said quickly, seeming to almost fall over his own words. Rey beamed up at the awkward man now pouring her a glass of wine and she couldn’t help but look at him longingly. 

What Professor Ren was doing for her was incredibly sweet but at the same time Rey found herself more and more disappointed. For one, she wished that Ben felt the same way about her that she felt for him. And second, she knew that no date would ever compare to the one she was pretending to be on with Ben right now. No one else could ever look this dashing and be this charming while also having what looked to be a nervous meltdown. ‘ _ Was she making him nervous?’ _ She thought to herself, but then she remembered how he had openly admitted that having her in his home made him uncomfortable from the get go. ‘ _ Then why is he even bothering with this?’ _ She considered as he served her a delicious looking portion of chicken. 

Rey wanted to cry out in frustration because of all the mixed signals her professor was giving her. As dinner went on, she couldn’t help but be more and more attracted to him. “And this is usually when someone would ask you what you like to do for fun. But that’s a stupid question. Instead ask they should be asking you meaningful questions like, ‘how do you define beauty?’ or ‘would you rather be loved or love,’” he babbled on, barely ever looking up from his plate. 

Rey sat across from a man that she had hated only days prior and now couldn’t help but think about what his lips would feel like on hers. She had to figure out if he was simply just teaching her a life lesson, or if he really was interested in her, but she didn’t want to risk the unlikely friendship they had formed over the past couple of days. “Would you rather be loved or love?” she coughed out suddenly, surprising herself. Professor Ren looked up at her for a moment before saying “yeah, exactly. See you’re doing great.”

“No,” she corrected him. “I’m asking you. Would you rather love or be loved?” She watched as Ben’s eyes settled on her and his Adam's apple bobbed slightly. He took a contemplative breath then answered. “Honestly, I’d really like to be a romantic and say that I would prefer to love than be loved. But selfishly I think I, like most humans, have a basic desire to be loved. Do you agree?”

Rey considered his answer before smiling. “I mean, you’re talking to an orphan here, so I think I’m hard wired to covet something I never had growing up,” she said thoughtfully. Her professor nodded in agreement then went back to picking at his food. Rey couldn’t help but feel as though Ben was putting up a wall. It was a haphazard wall that he often seemed to step beyond, but she could sense it nonetheless.

“Can I ask you about your family,” she asked quietly, hoping to have Professor Ren open up to her. The man across from her immediately tensed up before looking at her with a dark look in his eyes. “Rey,” he began but then stopped. He looked like he was having an internal argument with himself before he began again reluctantly.

“I grew up in New York with my mother and father. My mom was, and still is, a brilliant academic and won several accolades for her work with the conservation department at the Metropolitain Museum of Art. My father, on the other hand, was a successful actor and had always hoped that I would go into acting or sports or medicine. Something he deemed acceptable. 

The two of them were rarely home, as their work seemed to come before raising a child. Thus, I was brought up by countless nannies and tutors. Long story short, I attended Columbia and studied French history, much to my father’s chagrin. My mother, on the other hand, was incredibly proud and tried to push me to get my doctorate in England, under the tutelage of my Uncle Luke,” Ben paused for a moment pursing his lips and looking back to Rey before continuing.

“I started working toward my doctorate at Oxford as Luke’s research assistant, but I kept receiving calls and emails from The First Order Historical Society in Paris. My doctorate was focused on the art of  Jacques-Louis David and the Reign of Terror, so hearing from a prominent establishment in France was  intriguing .

I eventually spoke with Doctor Snoke, and he offered me a grant to complete my Ph.D. research with the Paris Sciences et  Lettres Research University. My mother and Luke both warned me against accepting Snoke’s offer, as he had some sordid history in the academic realm, but I didn’t care. I saw an opportunity to break free of my family’s shadow and make a name for myself instead. So, I joined him and began working with his team to conduct my research. Snoke insisted I change my name and cut my ties with my family so as to be taken more seriously, so I did. I was so focused on making an impact in the historical community that I didn’t care what bridges I burned in the process or whose work I took advantage of to get the information I sought. I was ruthless in my quest for success and I became blind to the fact that Snoke had been manipulating me to work as his puppet the entire time,” Ben paused again to take a sip of wine. “Rey...” he started to say again, then let out a deep breath and continued.

“Basically, my mom was right and I was too stubborn to listen to her or Luke. Snoke used me to do his dirty work for him with no intention of crediting any of my work before cutting my funding. He had a history of taking advantage of other fledgling historians and I was too naïve and cocky to think that it could happen to me too.

As all of this was coming to a head, my dad decided to make a last-ditch effort to bring me home and he came to France to try to reason with me. I told him I had already figured out that I was wrong and that I knew what I had to do. This was the first time he actually looked proud of me in my entire life. He said that when I got  back, we would all try harder as a family and work on building trust again. He told me he loved me and left, agreeing to meet me at the airport when I got back to Kennedy. 

The next day I destroyed all of the research I had conducted at the First Order and I left. When I got back to New York I waited for my dad to pick me up at my terminal, but he never showed up,” Ben stopped again and took a long pause. Rey’s breath was caught in her throat and she wanted to reach out to him, but settled on giving him space and to come to her if he needed support.

“He was involved in a car accident coming to pick me up and died on the scene. If I hadn’t chosen to abandon my family out of spite and arrogance, he’d still be alive. The paper’s made sure to blame me for his death, as did my uncle. I’m sure my mother still blames me, but she left her job at the MET to get me away from the city and away from the public eye. She gave up on her dream job to harbor the man who got her husband killed, and now we’re here. Just existing,” he concluded, unwilling to look up at her. 

‘ _ Oh god, the note,’ _ Rey thought to herself, immediately overcome with grief. ‘ _ You are still so profoundly unhappy,” _ she recalled writing to him, unaware of his life story. “Ben. I’m so sorry,” was all she could say before she felt tears spilling down her cheeks. “Rey, I didn’t tell you that to upset you. It’s just, you asked. And I’ve never actually told that story to anyone. It just felt like the right time to share it,” he responded looking up at her with glassy eyes.

“I never would have written you that note had I known what you’d been through. I’m such an idiot,” she said, wiping tears away in embarrassment.

Professor Ren Smiled then and breathed deeply. “I actually feel good.  Lighter, I think. I just had to tell someone,” he admitted.

Rey dabbed her drying tears and took a sip of wine. “Well, thank you for sharing your story with me, Ben. If it’s any consolation, I understand why you left. And I don’t blame you for your father’s death. He was proud of you and I think to die being proud of your child and knowing that they’re okay and on the right path is a better way to go than many others have it,” she added. “You may have gotten lost for a bit, but you eventually found your way home. And I hope one day you realize that your mother left her job because saving her son mattered more to her than anything else. I hope one day that you can grow from this grief,” she said before hesitating and looking away from him. “I think you’re brilliant and sweet and funny and okay, sometimes you’re a bit of an  arse , but you’re really wonderful. I hope one day you can see yourself that way and not as this monster that you’re convinced you are.”

Professor Ren looked at her intensely then and clenched both of his fists before releasing them and slowly standing up from the table. “Thank you, Rey,” he said as he breathed deeply then ran his hand through his hair. “Really, thank you,” he reiterated. Rey smiled up at him brightly then stood as well, beginning to gather some of the dishes  from the table. 

The two cleaned up then headed upstairs to go to bed. They both halted outside of Rey’s room before separating. “Thank you for tonight,” Rey said. Although it seemed like they had broken ground this evening and gotten to a place of open understanding with one another, she was still unsure of Ben’s feelings toward her and she was unwilling to risk it. Ben took a step closer and to Rey’s surprise, placed one of his large hands gently against her cheek. She couldn’t help her body’s reaction to lean into the warmth and close her eyes for a moment, savoring his touch. She opened her eyes when she felt his hand shift to the side and place a stray hair behind her ear. 

“No, thank you,” he responded. “For everything,” he added before moving his hand away and turning to leave. Rey instantly missed the warmth of his touch and called out after him before she could stop herself. “Wait,” she said quietly. Her voice had come out just louder than a whisper but  it halted Ben in his tracks. He looked back at her questioningly.

“Please. Stay,” she asked, hating how desperate her voice  sounded. “I’m not going anywhere, Rey. We’re snowed in,  remem ...” but Rey cut him off before he could finish his sentence. “With me. Tonight. In here,” she motioned awkwardly to the door then looked away from his dark gaze, unwilling to look at him when he rejected her. “Rey,” he said. His voice sounding like more of a warning than anything else. 

“Just forget I asked,” she said quickly. Wanting to blame the wine for her foolishness. Rey turned away from him and slinked inside her room in embarrassment. ‘ _ What were you thinking?’ _ She screamed at herself as fresh tears threatened the corners of her eyes. She  hurriedly plopped herself into bed and pulled the covers over her head, wanting to scream into a pillow in frustration. 

Before she could do so, however, she felt the mattress next to her dip down under the weight of another body and she released the breath she hadn’t realized she had been holding. She felt a firm arm slip under her shoulders and she let her body be pulled up against his. A heavy arm held her back gently as she placed her head comfortably on his chest ,  resting her hand on his sternum. 

After several minutes, she could hear Ben’s quick heartbeat beg i n to even out and she smiled into his chest. She didn’t know what tomorrow would bring for them, but she savored the feeling of being held in his arms tonight. For once she felt safe and home. Two things she had been without for as long as she could remember.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well that escalated quickly...
> 
> This chapter is a bit longer than the previous ones. Enjoy.
> 
> Thanks as always for reading! Comments and feedback are always welcome!


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey and Professor Ren wake up together and are forced to face reality.

Kylo woke up early the next morning to the feeling of Rey wrapped around him. As much as he wanted to hate himself for joining her last night, he couldn’t. He wanted Rey in the worst way. He knew it was wrong and yet he still felt an indescribable pull toward her. So much so that he had even opened up to her about his past. Something he hadn’t done with anyone before.

As he laid in bed with her, softly stroking the back of her head, he could hear the snow plows beginning to clear the roads outside. He refused to think about Rey leaving and yet he knew that their connection would be severed once he they could leave the house and get her back to her car. He dreaded the thought of going back to normal life. Even more so, he dreaded the fact that he would have to stare at Rey in class and pretend that what they had never happened.

Kylo reminded himself that Rey was his student. No matter how much he hated the idea, he couldn’t change that. She needed this class to graduate and he was the only one scheduled to teach this section in the spring.  Kylo heard himself audibly groan in disdain and wished he hadn’t as Rey began to stir beneath his arms. 

Ren loosened his grip on Rey’s body and she turned gracefully onto her back, stretching her arms over her head. The sunlight that was streaming through the window kissed her every curve the way  Kylo wished he could, and she looked gorgeous.

“Hi,” she chirped quietly as she opened her eyes and smiled up at him from her pillow. “Hi,” replied Ren in a low voice, running his hand through his messy hair. Rey’s eyes watched his hand then drifted slowly down his face and landed on his lips.  Kylo could feel his heart begin to beat more wildly as his own eyes drifted to Rey’s perfect pink lips. 

The chemistry between the two was palpable and almost unbearable, as  Kylo felt himself drift closer to Rey’s body. Rey delicately placed a hand to Ren’s cheek, her eyes darkening slightly. Ren’s breath caught in his throat and he gently grabbed Rey’s hand and in one swift motion moved his body over  her’s and pinned her under him. Rey laid beneath him, shifting her legs so that he could lay comfortably between them. The two stared at  each other for a long moment, both unwilling to be the one to cross the final line between them and make the first move. 

Kylo let out a deep breath and rubbed his thumb over Rey’s fingers that he held pinned over her head. The girl beneath him bit her lip in response, the sight of which ma de  Ren release a small breathy moan. Unable to resist the urge to kiss her any longer, he slowly lowered his face to hers pausing just before making contact with her lips , feeling her small, warm breaths on his face.

Milliseconds away from closing the distance between them, Rey’s phone suddenly blared causing  Kylo to jump away from her in response. The phone call caught both of them off guard and seemed to act like a slap of reality.  Kylo fell back onto his pillow and put his hand over his eyes as he willed his body to relax, and Rey shot up and grabbed her phone.

“Hello?” she answered in a noticeably shaky voice. “Oh yes, hi. You’ll be there in an hour. Okay, um, yes that’s great. No that’s not a problem. We just might have to dig our way out, but we should make it there about the same time. Thanks so much!” She said cheerfully into the receiver before hanging up the call.

“That was the...” she began but  Kylo cut her off. “Let’s go,” he responded without looking up at her. Rey jumped out of bed and ran to the bathroom to get changed into her uniform. She folded his things nicely and laid them on the end of the bed that she had begun to straighten. “It’s fine, Rey. Leave it. Let’s get moving,” He said as he got up and went downstairs to grab his shoes and coat. 

Rey followed  close behind and neither seemed to want to acknowledge what had passed between them moments earlier. As Ren laced up his boots, he could feel Rey’s eyes burning into him. Simultaneously, he could feel his cheeks reddening in embarrassment. ‘ _ What the fuck were you thinking? _ ’ he screamed at himself, still refusing to make eye contact with the girl beside him. Going to bed with Rey was one thing, but kissing her would have been entirely beyond the line they both seemed to have been toeing since the other night.  _ ‘Just get her back to her car and forget any of this ever happened _ ,’ he thought as he attempted to talk himself down from his rising panic. ‘ _ Nothing happened. No one will find out. Everything will be fine _ ,’ he continued. 

Kylo’s thoughts were interrupted then by Rey. “Do you have an extra shovel I could use to help you clear the driveway?” she asked quietly.  Kylo remembered the sound of snow plows this morning and internally prayed that his neighbor, Walley, had also cleared his driveway. He had been the happy recipient of an expensive bottle of whiskey from Ren at the beginning of the season, and he hoped that he had remembered to help him out today. 

Instead of responding to Rey’s question, Ren pulled on his jacket and continued to the garage. On his way, he pressed the door opener and to his relief he saw that his neighbor had indeed come through. “Oh,” he heard Rey mumble softly behind him as he got into his got into his car and started it, not bothering to open Rey’s door for her. ‘ _ The sooner we get her out of here, the sooner you can get your life back on track _ ,’ he reminded himself as Rey fumbled for her seatbelt and closed her door behind her.

Kylo let his car warm up for a moment before he backed out of his driveway and carefully made the drive back to Rey’s car. Lucky for him, the tow guy had gotten there before them and had dug out Rey’s car for her before loading it onto the truck. Kylo pulled over in front of the tow truck and stared silently ahead of him, ignoring Rey’s questioning stare. He felt like a coward, but he couldn’t handle looking into her eyes and sensing the rejection and judgment he knew he would most likely find there.

Rey unbuckled her seatbelt and let out a long breath before turning her body toward  Kylo . “Um, thank you, Ben. For everything...” she began but stopped herself before going any further. Without even looking at her he could almost hear the tears welling up in her eyes.  _ ‘Damnit _ ,’ he thought to himself, frustrated once again for making the beautiful woman next to him upset. “Rey,” he began to say as he looked over but he was greeted with the passenger side door slamming shut. “Fuck,” he cursed quietly as he watched Rey in his rearview mirror make her way to the man hooking her car up to his truck.

‘ _ Just go before you do something stupid _ ,’ he thought as he brought his forehead down to lean on his steering wheel. He took a moment to gather himself, then without a glance behind him, he put his car into drive and made his way back home. 

Once inside,  Kylo poured himself a glass of bourbon and stood awkwardly in his kitchen not knowing what to do without Rey. He had lived alone his entire adult life, and yet three day with one girl and he was already lost without her. 

Before making his way up to his office to busy himself in his work in order to attempt to forget about Rey, he looked up the tow company that she was using and called them, making sure to pay for the cost of her towing expenses as well as any work that needed to get done in order to get her car in working condition again. He knew Rey would probably be annoyed with him for doing this, but he left his credit card number with the company anyway, then committed himself to grading and forgetting about the beautiful girl he wished was still there.

_____________________________________________________________________________________

“Wait, what?” Rey exclaimed after she had asked if the tow company and mechanic on staff had a payment plan and instead  had been told that everything was already paid for. 

“Yeah, a gentleman called earlier and made sure all of your expenses were put on his card. You should be happy, kid. This wasn’t a cheap fix,” the man at the front desk responded as she stood there slack-jawed. “Lou is just finishing up now. You should be driving  outta here in a few,” he added before  turning away from her and walking toward the back office.

Rey thought to how her and  Kylo had left things off in his car. He had put his walls back up again and she knew that anything she said to him would have been useless. He seemed so upset with what had transpired that morning that she couldn’t face his rejection when they parted, so she jumped out of his car before he could say anything. She couldn’t believe that she had almost cried in front of him, but she thought they had shared something special that morning. She thought he was actually going to kiss her too, until... 

Her mind came back to the present and she suddenly remembered that Professor Ren had covered her auto expenses. Of course, half of her was relieved, as she knew she would’ve had to take on extra shifts at Maz’s to pay off the cost, but the other half of her was upset that he felt the need to treat her like a charity case. Everyone she had come across in her life had treated her like a poor lost child, and she just wanted someone to see her as the capable woman that she was. She had honestly thought Ben saw her like that the other night, but she just couldn’t be sure of anything with him anymore. 

‘ _ Just call him and tell him to cancel the payment _ ,’ she suddenly thought to herself as she grabbed her cellphone out of her pocket. It took her a moment to realize that she didn’t even have Professor Ren’s number. ‘ _ He’s not your friend, Rey. He’s your teacher _ ,’ she reminded herself as disappointment washed over her. She took a seat in the waiting area as she fought back more tears. 

This entire thing really was nothing. She was nothing to him. She had read into their connection all wrong and now reality was setting in. ‘ _ He wasn’t nothing to do with you _ ,’ said a small voice from within her. She wiped a few stray tears from her eyes. ‘ _ He’s your teacher. There’s nothing between you. Forget him _ ,’ said the voice, this time more confident.

A few minutes later, the man at the front desk returned and handed her they  keys to her car. “You’re all set, kid. Drive safe. Roads are still a mess,” he said, opening the door to the shop for her and leading her to her car. “Thanks,” she responded quietly. “For everything,” she added.

“It’s my job,” quipped the man. “You might want to thank your friend though,” he said with a smile. “I wish I had someone who cared half as much about me as he does about you,” he mumbled as he waved to her then shut the door, not waiting for her response.

Rey stood in the parking lot of the tow company just staring blankly at her car. ‘ _ He doesn’t actually care, Rey. He was just doing it because you told him your sob story _ ,’ she chastised herself as tears again rolled down her cheeks. She wiped her cheeks in frustration then hopped into her car and began making her way back home. On the way she decided that she would pick up a few extra shifts at the diner and attempt to get together as much money as she could to pay Professor Ren back. She didn’t need his charity and certainly didn’t need to be indebted to him, especially not after everything he did for her already. She would work her ass off for the rest of winter break and give him his money back on the first day of classes.

Rey got back to her apartment safely then gave Maz a call.

_____________________________________________________________________________________

The past couple of weeks had been absolute torture for Ren. He had unintentionally finished all of his grading after two days, then had nothing else to do to occupy his time. Once the roads were clear he began running again and sometimes he would spend hours at the gym ignoring the  thoughts of Rey that haunted him. 

After Rey left, he couldn’t stop his mind from wandering to thoughts her. The sound of her voice. The color of her eyes. The way she had smiled at him that morning before he had made a fool of himself with her. She consumed his every thought and he struggled to try to put her out of his mind. 

Several nights he had drank himself into a stupor and fought himself from looking her up on social media, or looking for her school email address. He wanted so badly to reach out to her, but what could he possibly say to her? They couldn’t be together and for all he knew, she might not even have felt the connection he had to her. She most likely thought of him as her creepy professor who kept her locked away in his house and made inappropriate moves on her. 

At the end of the first week that had gone by following his time with Rey, he had angrily broken several glasses remembering how he had fucked everything up with her that one morning. And he had also quite possibly broken several bones in his hand after punching a hole into his wall after finding himself unable to sleep one night having had the most peaceful dream about  lying beside Rey as she smiled up at him. 

By the end of winter break he felt himself losing it, and when his friend Phasma called him up for drinks one night, he  jumped at the idea of getting out of the house. 

“Jesus, Ren. You look like shit,” said Phasma as he made his way over to the seat beside her at the bar. “What happened to your hand?” she asked with uncharacteristic concern, causing him to look at her. 

Kylo had known Phasma from before everything that had happened with Snoke. They attended Columbia together and although neither made much of an effort, they ended up being friends. “Seriously,  Kylo . I haven’t seen you look like this since after... your dad,” she stopped hesitantly  scanning his eyes for answers. 

Kylo ignored her and ordered  a glass of bourbon. He looked forward blankly and let out a deep breath after taking a healthy sip of his drink. “Is everything alight with work?” she asked, still very clearly concerned. “Is your mom alright?” she mumbled, seemingly racking her brain for what could be wrong with him.

“Leia’s fine,” he responded as he bit the inside of his cheek out of habit. “Work is,” he began but hesitated. “Fine,” he concluded, but he knew Phasma would immediately pick up on his quick pause. 

“It’s Hux, isn’t it. The smarmy bastard. Don’t let him get to you, Ren. He just wants you to fail because he’s intimidated by you and knows you’re a better educator than he’ll ever be,” she interjected confidently, placing her glass down in front of her with more force than necessary. 

“ Phas ,” he began, but stopped himself. He knew Phasma of all people would never judge him for developing feelings for a student, but he didn’t know if he wanted to admit this out loud and make it real. He took  another sip of his drink, then realized that he needed to talk to someone about this, otherwise he may very well go insane. 

Kylo spent the next several minutes admitting to his friend everything that had happened with Rey and the strong feelings he had developed for her. He mentioned feeling gross about thinking of her in a less than professional way, and even more gross for allowing himself the opportunity to sleep beside his student when he knew he should have just walked away from the situation and been a better man. He also mentioned how the two had opened up to one another, but how he was now fairly certain that he had misconstrued her feelings toward him and that he regretted everything. 

“Oh Ren,” Phasma finally spoke after listening to  Kylo’s tirade. “You’ve got it bad,” she admitted shaking her head.  Kylo put his head down on the bar in front of him and Phasma gave him a sympathy pat on the back. “Listen, Ky,” she began. “From everything you’ve told me, it sounds pretty clear that Rey may have also had feelings for you. I mean what girl invites you into her bed if she doesn’t at least feel safe in your company. Even if she didn’t necessarily want something more from you, it says a lot that she trusted you to be so close with her considering what you told me about her background.” She added as she motioned for the bartender to refill the pairs drinks.

“If it matters, I think your little pretend date sounded sweet and even if you came on a little strong that one morning, it sounds like she never actually told you to fuck off or stop. Did you guys talk about the whole almost kissing thing?” she asked as she tapped  Kylo on the shoulder and passed him another glass. 

“No. We both kind of panicked. Or at least I did, and we just got our stuff together and bolted. I think she might have regretted letting things get to that point and I really just didn’t want to hear my fucking dream girl telling me to get a life,” he admitted then took a sip of his drink  and shook his head.

“Did you ever think that maybe the way you put up your classic ‘ Kylo Wall,’ or should I say “ Kylo Fortress,’ may have given her the idea that you were the one who regretted things and not the other way around?” she questioned him bluntly, causing him to purse his lips as he mulled over her words. “If she wanted anything to do with  me, she could have reached out at any point over the past two weeks,” he responded flippantly.

“ Kylo ,” she said warningly, but Ren ignored her. “No,  Phas . If she had any feelings for me other than regret, she could’ve looked up my email or something and gotten in touch with me. I just have to get over her and move one. Nothing happened between us... the whole thing was nothing,” he said looking straight ahead again.

Phasma took a deep breath, seemingly frustrated. “I mean, email works both ways, Ky,’ she mumbled. Ren glared at her as she shook her head knowingly.  Kylo said nothing but reminded himself that if Rey had had any feelings for him, she would have reached out. He had put  himself out there pretty clearly, and he refused to make a fool of himself again.

“ So what now? Once classes start? Are you just going to try to convince yourself you hate her or something? Bolster those walls and ignore her until she graduates?” asked Phasma who was now crossing her arms and leaning back into her seat. 

Kylo watched as he swirled the liquid in his glass. He hated how Phasma knew exactly what his plan was going to be, and he hated even more that she knew it wasn’t going to work. “Just talk to her, Ren. Sure, she’s your student. But maybe if she actually reciprocates these feelings you have for her, you two can just keep your wits about you until May. Then you both can figure out what to do from there like a couple of adults,” she said reassuringly.

“And what if she admits that this was all a mistake and she  wants nothing to do with me?” he spat back at Phasma, not willing to believe he actually had a chance with the girl he felt so strongly about. “Then you grow the fuck up, Ben solo, and get over her,” she added bluntly. As much as he hated her honesty in that moment as well as the fact that she had used his real name, he knew she was right. He needed to get a grip and stop groveling like a teenage boy. As soon as classes start, he would speak with her and tell her how he felt about her. 

Kylo groaned thinking about how much he would rather wallow in self-pity than confront his issue head on. “Ren, if she managed to see through this brooding asshole façade that you love to put up, then I really think she might be someone special. You love to beat yourself up, but you’re a good guy and you deserve to be happy,” she said quietly.  Kylo looked over to his friend and was surprised by her candidness. Phasma had seen him  through his worst moments, yet to hear her say that she believed he was still a good man, moved him. 

“ Phas ,”  Kylo began to say, but the woman next to him cut him off quickly. “Yeah, don’t get used to it. I still think you’re a complete idiot, but you’re a good man Ren,” she said as she tried to contain a grin.

The two sat for a few minutes in companionable silence until Phasma settled the check for the drinks and stood up.  Kylo tried to pay the bill, but his friend refused. “Nope. Next time,” she said as she left a tip and signed her name. 

“Alright, you. Next stop, hospital,” she said as she looked toward  Kylo and put her jacket on. When Ren looked up at her confused, she gestured to his hand and he reluctantly followed her out the door and into the night.

By the time  Kylo arrived home, his right hand was in splint and he had been instructed to take some Tylenol and lay off the alcohol for a week or so while he healed his sprain.

For the first night since Rey had left, he felt like he actually had a plan moving forward. He knew he needed to confront Rey about his feelings for her and when she rejected  him, he would just need to move on and get his life focused back on work. His conversation with Phasma whirled around his head and he eventually drifted off into a dreamless slumber.

____________________________________________________________________________________

As the first day of classes began, Rey’s anxiety grew steadily. She had French History II with Professor Ren that afternoon. She had an envelope full of cash in her bag that she had every intention of giving him, although she was embarrassed by how little she would be handing him up front. She was able to work endless doubles at the diner over the past few weeks, but even so, she struggled to save a lot of money after paying her rent and buying basic groceries. Either way, she still wanted to pay him back, as she didn’t want him looking down at her with pity. 

Rey was fine before she had met Ben and would continue to be fully self-sufficient once she paid him back. When she decided on her plan to get out of his debt, she had called back the tow company to find out the exact cost she had accrued. She almost passed out when they told her that Professor Ren had paid them $6000 on her behalf. Rey had never even had $6000 to her name. It would absolutely take her several months, if not years, to make enough to pay him back, but she was determined to do it. ‘ _ You’re not a charity case. He just feels bad for you and your pathetic life _ ,” she reminded herself as she nervously paced the quad before her first class. 

Finn had tried to convince Rey that maybe Professor Ren didn’t actually pity her, and that maybe he was covering her car costs because he just wanted to. “Finn, he hates me. He wouldn’t even look at me when he dropped me off. I just... I read the situation wrong and put him in an uncomfortable situation. He just paid for everything because I told him my sob story and he probably  sees me the same way everyone else ever has,” she had told her friend when he got back from his trip.

Rey remembered the way Finn had shook his head at her and refused to accept her answer. “Rey, if everything you’ve told happened exactly as you say it did then you, my darling little friend, are so delightfully naïve.” 

Rey knew she hadn’t exactly had a lot of experience with men, but she wasn’t a complete idiot. “I told you already. I must’ve read the situation wrong because the way we left things wasn’t exactly warm and fuzzy,” she had argued, remembering how awful she felt as she slammed Professor Ren’s door behind her. 

“He was going to kiss you, Rey. He went out of his way to take you on your first date. He spooned with you for the love of god. The man is into you, dude. He probably just feels weird about everything because you’re his student. You guys never actually talked about anything between you, right?” he had asked as Rey considered everything Finn had said. “No, but he just kept giving me such mixed signals. If he wanted to kiss me, he should’ve just done it!” She recalled as Finn had  shook his head smiling. “You were quite literally trapped in his house, Rey. He probably just didn’t want you to feel weird. I mean, any man would be an idiot not to find you attractive. Myself excluded, obviously. I don’t swing that way. But seriously. He was probably just waiting for you to make the  first move or some chivalrous bullshit,” he had told her.

Rey kicked a rock around, still pacing the quad and thinking about the last thing that Finn had said about the situation and hating how right he was. “As much as you don’t want to, Rey. You're going to have to talk to him about what happened.” 

The last thing she wanted to do was have a conversation with him about her feelings, just to have him laugh in her face and think even less of her. But she knew that Finn was right. She needed to clear the air between them and move forward, one way or another. 

The next few hours crept by and left Rey feeling more and more panicked as the start of his class drew near. It had taken quite a bit for her to open up to Ben about her past, but she had never liked anyone enough to willingly trust them with her heart. Rey rolled her eyes to herself and tried to convince herself that the feelings she had for Professor Ren weren’t anything she hadn’t experienced before, but every fiber of her being knew that what she felt for him was something new. Something special. Something that if it wasn’t reciprocated, had the potential to break her usually solid core. For the first time since she was a child, Rey felt vulnerable. She let herself fall for someone she shouldn’t have and now she was going to have to own up to it and pick up the pieces after he laughed in her face.

Rey clenched both of her fists as she looked at the time on her phone and then slowly made her way to Professor Ren’s classroom. Before she walked into the room to see the man that she had grown feelings for, she hesitated and took a deep calming breath.

“Kenobi,” she heard a deep voice say behind her as she turned with a start and came face to face with Ben. Rey gulped awkwardly, forgetting how to act like a human for a moment before steeling herself and responding with a polite nod. 

She heard Professor Ren let out what sounded like a scoff and Rey looked back up at him with furrowed brows. He didn’t meet her eyes, and instead made his way into the classroom and placed his bag down on his desk and started to take out the syllabus. “God, I hate him,” said the boy with glasses she recognized from the first section of Professor Ren’s class as he passed Rey and made his way into the room. “Tell me about it,” she mumbled in frustration and she followed him in. How could she have let herself have feelings for such a grumpy bastard?

Rey took a seat toward the back of the room and kept her head low for the duration of the class. Professor Ren spent most of the period reviewing the syllabus and the rest of it answering questions and going over his expectations of his students. He never once looked at Rey and she felt herself getting more and more annoyed by the second. As the class came to an end, Professor Ren assigned their first reading then let them leave a few minutes early. 

Rey took her time gathering her things and waited for her classmates to file out of the room before making her way up to speak with her teacher. “Professor,” she began, but he instantly cut her off with a snippy remark. “What do you want, Kenobi?” 

Rey was again taken aback by his attitude toward her and shook her head slightly in disbelief at how rude he was being. She took a moment to take in the sight of him before continuing. Upon closer inspection, she could see that he had dark circles under his eyes and he looked stressed. She watched as he brushed his hair out of his face and she noticed that his hand was in a splint. 

“ You’re hand?” she asked, unable to hid the concern in her voice. Instead of responding to her question Professor Ren’s eyes darkened and he repeated what he had said earlier. This time in a much more serious and almost pleading tone. “What do you want, Rey?”

Rey recognized that look from when she had stayed with him, but she was still unable to decipher what he was thinking behind those dark eyes. Rey hesitated before reaching into her bag and handing Professor Ren the envelope she had collected her tips in. “I want you to have this,” she said confidently as she held the envelope out  in front of her and waited for him to take it. 

Professor Ren continued to stare at her intently, but made no move to take the envelope from her. “I called the tow company and they told me how much everything ended up being. This isn’t even close to that amount, but it’s a start,” she said as she placed the envelop on the desk in front of her professor. “Thank you,” she added. “For everything.”

Rey hoped that Professor Ren would understand her meaning, but he looked down at the envelope and shook his head. “I’m not taking this,” he said sternly as he ignored the envelop and began packing up his bag. “Ben,” Rey said angrily. “I want to pay you back. I don’t want you looking at me like I'm a little orphan girl charity case. I’ll get you the rest, I just need some time,” she added as she adjusted her bag and turned to leave. 

“I’m really not taking this, Kenobi. I didn’t do it because I felt bad for you,” he said as he followed her to the door and held the envelope back out for her. Rey looked up at him then back down to the envelope. ‘ _ There is no bloody way that Finn was right about this. Was there? _ ’ she suddenly thought to herself as he stood in front of her with the envelope in his outstretched hand. “You had a shitty upbringing and I hate that, but I don’t pity you, Rey. You have your shit together better than most people ever will. The last thing you need is anyone’s charity,” he said in a deep voice that rattled her in ways she didn’t want to admit. 

Professor Ren had admitted what Finn had told her all along. He didn’t pity her. He did this because he wanted to, not because he felt guilted into it. Without thinking Rey delicately reached out and took the envelope back, but before turning to leave she took a step closer to her teacher and reached up to kiss him on the cheek. She quickly pulled away from him before she could gauge his reaction and she quickly left the room and Professor Ren standing silently within it. She may not have had the conversation that she wanted to have with him, but she absolutely made her feelings known. The ball was now in his court and she would just have to see what he did with it. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading and sticking around for this slow burn! Comments and feedback are always welcome.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A blind date becomes something much more interesting.
> 
> (This chapter is mildly E)

Kylo stood completely still and was afraid that if he moved, he would wake up from the dream he had just had of Rey. 

She kissed him. Well, his cheek, but still. He brought his hand up slowly and traced his face remembering how her warm lips had felt against his skin.

He had intended on speaking with her, like Phasma had advised, but the moment he saw her he had clammed up. He remembered how upset he was that she had never made an effort to reach out to him and he was even more upset with himself for having let things get to the point they had when she had stayed with him. He had decided to just ignore her and get through class so he could just leave and go about his day without thinking about her again.

That was until she took her time after class and waited for everyone to leave before she made her way over to speak with him. It hurt his feelings that she believed he thought so low of her. She was upset that he had paid for her car to be fixed because she thought he pitied her. He could never and would never pity the woman. Not when he knew just how strong, and smart, and beautiful she was. She was perfect and the fact that she expected him to feel sorry for her and look at her as a charity case truly upset him.

The look in her eyes after he had told her that he paid for her car because he wanted to and not because he felt guilted into it, shook him to his core. He could have sworn her pupils had blown wide and had become much darker than he ever remembered them. Except, perhaps, for that morning when he had had every intention of kissing her. And then she did it. She crossed the unspoken line between them. 

Standing alone in his classroom he wanted to punch himself for not stopping her from fleeing him. He should have told her everything. He should have kissed her back. But instead he froze up.

‘ _ Fuck, _ ’  Kylo thought to himself as he brought his injured hand up and through his hair. ‘ _ Phas _ _ was right _ ,’ he concluded. 

Eventually, he decided he could no longer stand gawking in the empty room so he turned off the lights and closed the door behind him, making his way to the parking lot. ‘ _ What does this mean _ ?’ he thought to himself as he walked. ‘ _ You’re looking too much into it. She was just being polite and thanking you for doing something kind for her. She doesn’t want anything more _ ,’ he began thinking as his mind slowly came down from the high it had been on after his encounter with Rey. He felt like reality was beginning to set in and now it was becoming clear that maybe Rey didn’t actually want him the way he desired her. Once again, he felt lost and on edge. 

‘ _ Why didn’t you just talk to her _ ?’ he nearly screamed in his mind as he sat in his car for a moment before making his way home. For a moment today, he felt like everything had changed, and yet as he made the lonely drive back to his empty home, he realized that nothing actually had. He still had no idea how she felt about him and he never opened up to her. They were back at square one and now he felt like he had gotten his hopes up for nothing.

When he arrived back home, he immediately poured himself a glass of bourbon and went up to his office to get some lesson planning done. ‘ _ Just stay focused and stop obsessing over nothing _ ,’ he thought to himself. ‘ _ If she wants anything from you, then let her be the one to come to you. Otherwise, just forget about her _ ,’ he reiterated as he checked him emails and landed one addressed to the entire faculty from Chancellor Organa.

_ “Welcome back educators and staff, _

_ I hope you all had a wonderful winter break and you are looking forward to the start of a new and exciting semester at  _ _ Corellia _ _ University.  _

_ I would like to take a moment to extend you an invitation to  _ _ Corellia’s _ _ annual holiday gala which will be held next Friday in the Grand Hall. There will be food, libations, and music and I encourage you all  _ _ to bring _ _ a plus one. _

_ As per annual tradition, classes will end mid-day on Friday, and the festivities will begin at 6pm. Formal attire is encouraged, as is  _ _ respectful _ _ revelry.  _

_ I look forward to seeing you all there and to the start of yet another successful semester at  _ _ Corellia _ _. _

_ Best regards, _

_ Chancellor Leia Organa” _

“Fuck,”  Kylo mumbled out loud, remembering the fact that he would be forced into attending the gala once again by both his mother and Hux. As if willing the dreaded conversation into actuality, he jumped as his phone suddenly blared to life. He looked at the caller I.D. and saw that it was his mother and considered for a long moment about not answering. The repercussions of ignoring her however, weren’t worth it.

“Hi mom,” he mumbled into the receiver, not attempting to hide his annoyance. “Ben, good. You got my email, I hope?” she said quickly into the phone, not wasting any time on pleasantries. “Good to hear from you mom. Oh, I’m doing well, thanks for asking,” he said sarcastically. 

“You’re coming this year. To the gala. You weaseled your way out of it last year, but this year you don’t have an excuse. Are you bringing anyone?” she asked, slipping in questions about his personal life like an expert interrogator. “Mom. Please. This is the last thing I want to be doing with my time. I have a lot of work to do, and I don’t need to be wasting my time at a party that no one even wants me at,” he responded in a pleading voice. “Cut the crap, Ben. You’re going. I’ll fire you if you don’t,” she added cheekily. “You can’t fire me for not going to your stupid party. It’s unethical,” he spat back at her, losing his patience with the current conversation. “Fine. But if you don’t  go I’ll give Hux that stupid plaque he’s been begging me for the past few years, and I'll hang it right outside your office,” she grumbled. 

“You’re a monster,” he said incredulously. “No, I’m your mother. That being said, if you’re not bringing anyone, I have someone I want you to meet,” she added nonchalantly. “Mom, no. This is not turning into a fucking blind date,” he began to interject, but his mother cut him off before he could say more. “Love you too, Ben. I’ll see you at the gala. It’s always nice catching up,” she muttered quickly, then the line went dead.

Kylo dropped his forehead to his desk with a soft thud. He then picked his head up an inch and let his softly thud back down again. ‘ _ Why must she torture him? Hasn’t he been through enough already _ ?’ he thought to himself, not sure if he wanted to cry or punch something. He had just under two weeks to figure out a way to get out of the gala, so he picked his head up and committed the rest of the evening to coming up with different excuses. ‘ _ Perhaps I can break my other hand _ ?’ he mused, but he knew deep down that his mother would surely demand his attendance regardless. “Fuck,” he groaned before making his way to his room and falling asleep for the night.

The rest of the week passed by without incident. It wasn’t until Friday when he woke up feeling his blood pressure rising. He would have to see Rey again that afternoon and he still didn’t know where they stood with one another. ‘ _ If she wants you, she will let you know _ ,’ he reminded himself and he set out for his morning classes.

That afternoon, Ren made sure to get to French History II earlier than last time, so as to avoid an awkward encounter with Rey outside of his room again. He busied himself with setting up his laptop presentation as well as his lecture notes and as soon as he checked the time on his phone to begin class, he locked the door to the room and began his lecture refusing to  distract himself by looking for Rey in the class before him.

Kylo spoke to his class about Robespierre’s rise to power within France and opened the floor to a discussion about the reading his class was expected to have completed from homework. “In your reading you should have read about Marat’s role in the Reign of Terror. How did his death impact the momentum of the movement Robespierre was leading?” Ren asked as he stood at the front of the room looking intensely at his students. 

After a few moments, he realized that no one had raised their hand. “Did anyone actually do the reading I assigned for you?” he asked rhetorically. After a few more moments, of silence, he bit the inside of his cheek and took a seat at his desk. “Okay, wonderful. Everyone take out a sheet of loose leaf and respond to the question I just asked in an essay format. This will be graded as a quiz and will impact your final grade in this class significantly. You have the rest of the period to complete your assignment. You may begin,” he said as he sat back and unintentionally made eye contact with Rey.

Her eyes cut right through him and he was taken back by the intensity behind them. ‘ _ Was she pissed about the quiz? Surely, she did the reading. She’s an exceptional student _ ,’ he thought as he tried to reassure himself. ‘ _ Then why did it look like she wanted to murder me _ ?’ he thought for a moment nervously and pretended to begin working on his laptop. 

At the conclusion of the class,  Kylo asked his students to bring him their assignments then dismissed them. When Rey walked up with hers, she looked like she was ready to say something to him, but instead dropped her paper into the pile on his desk and continued out the door. ‘ _ Fuck _ ,’ he thought to himself. He really had read into everything wrong. She wanted nothing to do with him and the kiss she had given him had been out of politeness and not out of  anything more.

As Ren walked to his car afternoon he began to think about his mother’s party and that maybe the opportunity to meet someone new wasn’t a terrible idea. It would give him the chance to stop obsessing over his uninterested student, even if it was for just a night.

That evening,  Kylo found it impossible, however, to not think about the way Rey had looked right through him during class. No other woman would ever live up to Kenobi in his mind and he began feeling depressed once again at the thought of his unrequited adoration of Rey. 

He found himself unintentionally skimming his student’s papers until her name jumped out at him. How he would be able to get through her paper without grading her with a bias, he wasn’t sure. After a moment, he stopped reading as something occurred to him.

_____________________________________________________________________________________

Professor Ren hadn’t even acknowledged her presence let alone given her some indication that he too reciprocated her feelings. She had put herself out there for him and it was now clear that he didn’t feel the way she hoped he had.

The only time Professor Ren noticed her was after he had given her class a pop quiz and their eyes met for just a moment. He had looked at her blankly then gulped, obviously uncomfortable about the way she had acted with him the other day. “Bloody hell,” she mumbled as he looked away from her and went back to  pretending, she didn’t exist. ‘ _ How could I have been so wrong _ ?’ 

After class Rey headed to Maz’s for her evening shift. It was a Friday, yet business had been slow and most nights she found herself completing her reading assignments or working on homework. During the “dinner rush” Rey had four tables. Two off which were older couples who were taking their time ordering, and the other two were her regulars. After bringing Marv his usual, Rey stopped by ‘O’ at the counter.

“Good evening, O. Will it be the usual tonight?” she asked kindly. The middle-aged woman was easily her favorite customer and was an old friend of Maz. “Thank you, Rey,” the woman responded as she sat presumably checking emails on her phone. “Oh, Rey,” the woman stopped her suddenly as she had turned to walk away. “I forgot to ask. Did Maz invite you to the party next Friday? I insisted that she bring you,” she asked with a smirk. 

Rey remembered Maz mentioning a fancy party in passing, but Rey had immediately put it out of her head as she was clearly the type of person who didn’t belong at a gala. 

“Erm, she mentioned something about a party, but  with all due respect, I don’t really think a fancy shindig is my thing. I mean, look at me. I’m a broke university student who works in a diner,” she said as she feigned an uncomfortable laugh. “I genuinely appreciate the invitation, but I wouldn’t even have anything appropriate to wear. This is about the nicest thing I own,” she added as she did a half-hearted twirl to show off her dingy uniform.

O put her phone and took her glasses off in a huff. “Rey, I wanted Maz to invite you because you’re brilliant. She’s told me all about your academic prowess and what you’ve overcome in life and I think you’re more spectacular than you’ll ever know. I want to introduce you to a room full of some of the most talented academics in the North East. Your peers. The fact that you feel like you don’t belong somewhere is bullshit,” said O sternly. 

Rey was taken aback by how highly the woman before her respected her. She knew that O worked for  Corellia and was looked up to in the field, but to hear her tell Rey that she thought she was spectacular and that she truly believed she belonged, made the girls eyes begin to tear. “Thank you, O,” she began to say but the older woman cut her off. “I’m sending over a dress tomorrow. You’re coming to my event. No more ifs, ands, or buts about it,” she added as Rey was left staring at her.

She could say nothing else that could possibly please the woman before her, so she just smiled politely and thanked her. “Oh, someone will be there that I want you to meet. I think you might be the only person on earth who is strong and intelligent enough to knock him off of his damn high horse,” she mumbled as she put her glasses back on and went back to scanning her emails. 

Rey immediately felt a ping of guilt as she thought about Professor Ren. She knew she had an unhealthy infatuation with her teacher, but she just couldn’t shake her attraction to him. How could anyone else ever interest her or challenge her the way Ben did? Regardless, Rey smiled again at O and gave her a curt nod. The least she could do was meet this person out of respect for the older woman. 

Rey worked the rest of her shift without incident and made it home at a reasonable hour. She took a long shower to get the smell of French fries out of her hair, then settled in for the night with a cup of tea and one of her reading assignments. She couldn’t help it, however, when she found her mind wandering to the dark and brooding  man she slept beside several weeks ago. 

She couldn’t help feeling the heat rise in her cheeks as she thought about the way he had rolled on top of her and stroked her hand gently. She couldn’t help the wetness beginning to gather in her underthings as she thought about the length of his body pressed against her core, and how his supple lips would feel as they roamed her body.

Rey closed her book and found herself reaching for her vibrator in the drawer next to her bed. Just the thought of Professor Ren’s voice turned her on, and she imagined what he’d say to her if he was with her. She imagined what his large hands would feel like as they felt their way down her body, and she pinched one of her nipples through the fabric of her shirt as her other hand turned on her vibrator and found her sensitive clit. “Oh,” she moaned quietly as she laid back on her bed pleasuring herself to the thought of her professor. 

As she rubbed herself gently with her vibrator, she used the fingers on her other hand to trace her tight entrance. “Fuck,” she mumbled as her head fell back and she pressed a finger inside of her. 

Having never been particularly interested in letting anyone touch her, Rey knew how to please herself and what she needed to do to reach her climax. As she continued to rubbed small circles around her clit, she found the right spot just inside of her and began to massage it. She  pumped her finger in and out of her and soon felt herself nearing an orgasm. 

Rey turned up the speed on her vibrator and imagined that the finger currently inside of her was Professor Ren’s. “Oh my god, right there,” she panted as she felt herself suddenly tighten around her finger and she rode out her climax. She laid on her bed for several minutes feeling too sensitive to move, and unwilling to come back down for the high of her release. 

Eventually Rey convinced herself to get out of bed and use the restroom. She cleaned up, then crawled back into bed feeling lonelier than ever. ‘ _ Maybe meeting someone new would be good for her _ ,’ she thought to herself as she yawned. Anything would be better for her than masturbating to the thought of her unattainable Professor more often than she’d like to admit.

_____________________________________________________________________________________

The next time  Kylo saw Rey was when she walked into his class early on Tuesday. She didn’t look up when she walked in and he was immediately overcome with grief. He had spent all weekend trying unsuccessfully not to think about the brunette only to see her now and have her show absolutely no interest in him at all. He clenched his fist in frustration at his own weakness, and pretended to busy himself with his laptop prior to class. 

Ren made a point to not look at Rey during his lecture, as he didn’t want to make her feel uncomfortable but also because he didn’t think he had the strength to look away from her once he had. He lost himself in his lesson and barely noticed that he had run over by a few minutes until a boy with glasses in the front row began packing up his bag.

“Your quizzes will be graded by Friday. You’re dismissed,” he mumbled to the class as he closed his laptop and packed up his belongings as well. As he put on his jacket and began to make his way toward the door, he stopped abruptly as Rey walked quietly by him and through the open door. As she passed him all he wanted to do was reach his hand out and grab  hers. Instead, he froze and allowed her to pass by without incident. It was to his surprise, however, that she halted at the exit and turned back to him.

“Have a good night, Professor,” she said quietly as she bit her lip and looked up at him.  Kylo clenched his uninjured hand once more. This time, resisting the urge to tell her everything he’d been feeling since they were snowed in together. “You too, Kenobi,” he said more softly than he had intended. 

Rey gave him a weak smile, then turned and continued on her way.  Kylo stood for another few moments willing his body to relax before he exited the room and closed the door behind him. ‘ _ She reached out to him. After everything, she still made an effort to connect, _ ’ he thought to himself as he made his way to his car. He felt an ounce of hope growing within him again, but kept trying to remind himself not to think too much into things. 

The rest of the week went by smoothly. By Friday, his classes’ papers had been graded and he felt like he was mentally ready to see Rey again. She was being amicable and if that’s all that their relationship amounted to, he tried to convince himself that he could live with that. Plus, that evening he was going to be forced into the gala, as he forgot to come up with a reasonable excuse or break another appendage in time to get out of it. He hoped that it would serve as a welcome distraction to what he had been going through recently, and maybe the woman his mother wanted him to meet would end up being alright. He knew he was lying to himself about the last part, but pining over his student was proving to be incredibly stressful and depressing.

Kylo spent the first several minutes off class handing back his student’s work. He came to Rey’s quiz and his heart raced out of habit. He placed her assessment face down on her desk and he almost jumped when their hands grazed each other as she moved to take the paper from him. His eyes quickly shot to hers but she looked away. Before he moved on, he caught the hint of a blush ghosting the apples of her cheeks.  Kylo let out a steady breath as pride rushed over him realizing that he made her body react to him in a way that she couldn’t hide. Before he overanalyzed the situation, he continued to hand out the quizzes then returned to the front of the room.

“If you have any questions about your grade, please feel free to make an appointment to speak with me during my office hours. Just know I don’t offer re-tests and I almost never alter grades. Okay, let’s begin,” he said as he began his lecture. For several minutes he spoke passionately about Robespierre’s justification of the use of terror, but stopped mid thought when his eyes met Rey’s. He was taken aback by the look on her face. She looked furious and was mentally hurling daggers at him where he stood. He didn’t know what he could have done that would have caused this look from her, but he made his best effort to pull himself together and finish his sentence.

Rey had thrown him so off guard that he abruptly ended class half an hour early, explaining that he had an appointment that evening that he needed to leave early for. He heard a relieved groan pass through the class, and he packed up his bag as his students filed out the door. Before he could make his escape and catch his breath, Rey caught his attention. “Professor,” she nearly spat at him. “Can I have a word please?” she asked in a way that he knew she was furious with him. 

“How may I help you, Kenobi?” he asked with feigned disinterest as he watched the last students finally exit the room. He turned his attention back to the girl in front of him and he couldn’t help but feel his chest tighten. “My quiz, Ben!” she said angrily, as she held it out in front of her and motioned toward him. He took her paper from her and looked at the A that was circled at the top of her paper. He shook his head in confusion, not understanding the issue. “What, Rey? This is an excellent grade,” he said as he handed  the paper back to her and adjusted his laptop bag on his shoulder. 

“I’ve never once gotten an A in your class, and now this,” she said in a controlled rage. “I have no idea what you’re upset about, Kenobi. You should be proud of yourself,” he said as he shrugged and made his way toward the door. “Yeah, I’m really proud of myself,” she mumbled angrily as she pushed by him. “Really proud that I let my professor spoon me for an A,” she spat as she bounded down the hallway away from him. 

“Rey,” he called after her finally realizing why she was upset. “Fuck,” he said out loud as he slammed his classroom door shut and made his way to his car. Once inside he gripped the steering wheel tightly and fought the  urge to scream in frustration.

He understood what she must’ve been thinking. He had given her an A because of the time they had shared together, not because she had earned it. Ren shook his head because he knew this couldn’t have been any further from the truth but she didn’t give him the opportunity to defend himself. 

Ren sat for a few more minutes before he looked at the time and realized he had to go home and get ready for the stupid fucking gala that his mom was making him attend. His only relief was knowing that all he had to do was make a brief appearance, disappoint the girl his mom wanted him to meet, then  he could go back home and try to forget about what happened with Rey.

_____________________________________________________________________________________

Rey made the walk back to her apartment in record time. She was still worked up when she entered, but she had to get ready to meet up with Maz and go to  O’s party.

She jumped in the shower and tried her best not to think about Professor Ren. She was still furious that he had given her an A because she truly felt like he had done so unjustly. She knew her paper was good, but it was unlike Ben to disregard some of her grammatic errors or pick apart her thesis. She felt like she wasn’t graded fairly and that whatever connection they had was now influencing her grades. Rey prided herself in her exemplary academics because of all the hard work she put in. The last thing she wanted to feel was that she cheated the system and gotten an unfair score. Rey angrily scrubbed her hair and decided that she would make an appointment with him to discuss the matter further on Monday. Tonight, she would just forget about Ben and meet a nice boy who would value her work ethic and treat her with respect.

Rey finished getting ready in record time. She wore her hair down and in soft waves, and applied a sleek winged liner and soft burgundy lip. Maz had mentioned that she would be wearing white, so she opted for minimal makeup that would  complement the dress as opposed to something more dramatic.

Once done with her hair and makeup, Rey hopped in her car and drove to the Diner to finish getting ready. Finn had agreed to meet up with her beforehand and give her the final once over, and she was relieved to see his face when she walked in the door. “Hey beautiful,” he called to her as she entered, causing everyone in the diner to turn to look at her. “Hi,” she said quietly, uncomfortable from the attention but also still upset about her day. 

“You okay?” he asked her as she hugged him, almost as if he could read her mind. “Not really,” she admitted in a frustrated tone. “Just a bad day. I’ll fill you in tomorrow,” she added so as not to worry her friend too much. “Alright, but promise me you will be okay at your fancy party tonight?” he asked her as he squeezed her shoulders and met her gaze. “I’ll be fine,” she answered and gave him a half-hearted smile. 

Finn could obviously tell that Rey was upset, but he didn’t want to push it, which she respected immensely. Just then Maz entered the room with a garment bag in hand. “There you are,” she shouted at Rey and gestured to her with the bag. Maz was wearing a navy suit with a cream blouse and looked more put together than she had ever seen here. “Wow, Maz,” Rey began, but the woman cut her off. “I know, baby. I look  smokin ’, but you need to get changed so we can make it in time for cocktail hour. You know I love those little cocktail weenies,” she said with a grin as she  pushed Rey toward the restroom to change. 

Once she had gotten the dress  on, she looked in the bathroom mirror and almost didn’t recognize herself. The stark white fabric of the dress hugged Rey’s body like it had been specially made for her. Even though the neckline was modest and the dress met the floor, it left very little to the imagination. Her only saving grace was a modern floor-length white cape that obscured the outline of her firm, round behind. After taking in what she looked like she smiled proudly. O had selected a dress that made Rey look powerful and she intended on exuding that energy in a room surrounded by powerful intellectuals.

“Holy shit, Rey,” gaped Finn when she had made her way out of the bathroom. She couldn’t help but smile as she strode over to him and gave him a modest twirl. “Whoever this guy is, he’s going to be absolutely drooling when he sees you. Then he’s going to speak to you and really fall head over heels,” he added as he took her hand and helped her finish her spin. “You really do look stunning, my love,” added Maz. “Now let’s get moving,” she said as she began pushing Rey out the door of the Diner and into her car.

Maz and Rey arrived at  Corellia’s Grand Hall just as hors d'oeuvres were starting to be passed. Maz beelined toward one of the caterers carrying a tray and Rey found her way to the bar. She ordered herself a gimlet and got Maz her usual. As she made her way back to where she had last seen Maz she began to scan the room and couldn’t help but notice more than a few wayward glances directed at her. Rey let out a deep breath and continued her search for Maz. 

Eventually the two reunited and Maz handed her a delicate puffed pastry filled with a delicious spinach and feta mixture. Rey moaned as she took a bite of the delicious appetizer and Maz laughed. “Oh my god, Maz,” she said as she finished the second bite and wiped her mouth carefully. “Yeah, yeah. Just remember who you work for,” joked Maz as she took a sip of her drink. “You know I love your food, Maz,”  responded Rey playfully as she gave the woman next to ger a toothy grin. 

Rey and Maz continued to sip their drinks and steal bites of food whenever the caterer’s passed by. After roughly an hour had passed, people began heading into the dining area that was set up further back in the hall, and Maz told Rey she would go grab their place cards so they could find their table. Rey agreed to grab two more drinks and meet back at that spot before going in together, so the two finally split up.

As Rey was making her way back to meet up with Maz, a red-headed gentleman with an English accent stopped her. “I couldn’t help but notice your accent,” he said smoothly as he let his eyes roam over Rey’s body, immediately making her feel uncomfortable. 

“Um, yes. London. And yourself?” she responded politely, looking around frantically for Maz or O or anyone really to get her away from this gentleman. “South  Oxfordshire . How have we never met at one of these things before. My name is Hux. Armitage Hux,” he said as he extended a hand. Rey looked at her full hands and shrugged. “Rey. It’s a pleasure to meet you Mr. Hux,” she said kindly but with an air of disinterest, attempting to give him a polite hint that she couldn’t have been less interested in speaking with him. 

“I must say, you look absolutely stunning in that dress, Rey. It really accentuates your... athletic figure,” he said in what she could only presume was an attempt at seduction.  Hux moved one of his hands to Rey’s waist and gently traced her slight curves.  Rey tensed up and continued searching the crowd for someone to intervene so she didn’t immediately offend one of the ‘highly respected’ academics she was told about. She took a half step away from the man in order to put distance between them, but Hux followed her closely. “I’d love to see more of you...” said Hux, as he brought his face inches from her ear. “and what you’re hiding under that dress,” he added, bringing his hand up to stroke her shoulder. “Don’t touch me,” Rey said, wincing at the smell the liquor on his breath. She backed away from him again, this time shooting him a warning glare as she put space between herself and the red-haired man. 

She almost jumped when she heard a deep, familiar voice from behind her. “Good evening Hux, I see you’ve met Rey Kenobi, ” he said coolly.  “ one of  Corellia’s best and brightest students , ” he added as he neared the two. 

Rey looked over her shoulder to see Ben approaching her and Hux with a drink in hand. As mad as she was at him right now, she couldn’t help but find him wildly attractive. His hair was styled slightly more than it usually was and the perfectly tailored tux that he was wearing made him look like royalty. 

“Ah, Ren. Yes, Ms. Kenobi and I just met,” Hux nearly sputtered out. Rey turned her attention back toward the redhead and could now see that his eyes were blown wide and he had a blush growing up from the collar of his shirt. “I’m sorry to say that I must continue the rounds. Enjoy your night Ms. Kenobi,” he said with a nod then hurried away from the pair. Rey immediately relaxed and let out the breath she wasn’t aware that she had been holding. 

“Thank you for that,” she said as she took a sip of her drink then looked up to meet her professor’s eyes. Ben was biting the inside of cheek and uncomfortably scanning the crowd before he looked down at her with an intense stare. “I hate that guy,” he said firmly and Rey couldn’t help but let out a chuckle. “well thank you either way. He was a bit... forward,” she said and she could see Professor Ren’s fist tighten around his glass.  “Are you alright?” he asked, still looking at her intensely. Rey nodded and th e two stood in awkward silence, both seeming to remember their fight from earlier. 

“We should probably talk,” said Ben quietly. His eyes once again scanning the room. “Yeah, we really should,” agreed Rey as she looked back up at him and remembered her frustration from earlier. The two were suddenly interrupted however, by O. “Rey, love, you made it. And I see you met Ben,” she said happily as she waved Maz over to the group. “How do you know Rey?” asked Ben questioningly as he looked between O and Rey frantically. Rey furrowed her brows, confused by his change in  demeanor and she looked back to O, wondering how she knew her history professor. 

“Leia!” called a distant voice causing O to look around and call back. “One minute, John,” and the puzzle pieces suddenly fell together for Rey. Rey’s mouth dropped open in shock when she began to recognize the similarities in Ben and O’s faces. ‘ _ Oh no _ ,’ she thought to herself in disbelief as she realized that her favorite regular was Chancellor Leia Organa. Or more  specifically , Ben’s mother.

“Rey is Maz’s girl over at the diner, Ben. She’s brilliant. And beautiful, obviously. She’s the girl I've been wanting you to meet,” said Leia sincerely as she looked up at her son. “Mom, I already know Rey,” he replied, hurriedly pulling her away from the group and to the side of the room. Rey watched in horror as Leia and Ben had a quiet argument, and finally Ben stormed off and Leia returned to her and Maz.

“I’m sorry about that, Rey. I didn’t realize the  _ connection _ you two had. I just assumed that because you're an engineering student, that the two of you wouldn’t have ever crossed paths,” said Leia apologetically. 

“ Its fine, O... Leia.. Mrs. Organa. Why didn’t anyone tell me who you were. I’m so embarrassed that I didn’t recognize you,” admitted Rey. 

“It’s not like I'm a celebrity sweetheart. You couldn’t have known.  Plus, its’ been a delight getting to know you without the usual unease that the students and faculty feel around me,” she said reassuringly as she gripped Rey’s hand. “I’m sorry again about this mess, but I still stand by what I said to you about my son. I really think you are one of the only people on earth up to the challenge of getting through to him. Maybe once you graduate, we can revisit this,” she said with a wink then left Rey and Maz once more to speak with the other attendees.

“So , that was awkward,” piped Maz as she led them to their table. “Yeah, tell me about it,” replied Rey as the two found their places and took a seat. Rey still couldn’t believe that O was Leia Organa, and that Leia Organa was Ben’s mother, and that Ben’s mother had tried to set them up on a blind date. She took a long sip of her drink before dropping her head back and attempting to take  calming breaths . 

“Good luck with that,” said a deep voice to her right as she heard the movement of a chair being pulled out. “You have to be fucking kidding me,” said Rey quietly as she looked beside her to see Ben taking a seat. “Unfortunately, not,” he replied bitterly and the two stared at each other for a moment too long before Maz cleared her throat and greeted Ben. “It’s been a long time, Benny,” she said as she extended her glass to cheers him. “Indeed, it has,” he responded as he met her glass with his then took a healthy swig. “And how do you know my darling Rey here?” she asked even though it seemed like she already knew the answer to her own question. “Miss Kenobi is my student, Maz,” he answered uncomfortably.

“Is that so,” said the woman as she raised her eyebrows and passed a knowingly glance between her and Ben. 

“I need to moment. If you’ll both excuse me,” said Rey as she abruptly stood and began making her way out of the Grand Hall and into a side corridor. “Rey, wait,” she heard Ben call from behind her, but she continued slowly down the dark hallway until she reached a small sitting area outside a few offices. 

“Rey, we need to talk. I’m sorry about all of this. I didn’t know my mom was trying to set us up and...” he began but Rey stopped him. “Ben, it’s not your fault. It’s fine. I just needed some air,” she replied as calmly as she could.

“No Rey, it’s not. None of this is fine,” he said shaking his head. Rey felt hurt overwhelming her again. She was evidently an incredible burden for the man in front of her, and she just wished she could go back in time and stop them from ever meeting. “I’m sorry you feel that way,” replied Rey as she wiped a single tear quickly off of her cheek. 

Ben ran a hand through his hair and turned away from her for a moment, pacing. “Rey, listen. I’m sorry about everything. I never meant to make you feel uncomfortable. You're my student and the way I acted toward you at my house wasn’t... professional. I just want you to know that my feelings for you haven’t gotten in the way of your grades. I knew I wouldn’t be able to grade your papers without a bias, so I arranged for a TA to do my grading this semester. I know you were upset with your paper today, but I just wanted you to know that I didn’t actually grade it. You really did earn your score,” he said sincerely. 

Rey stood in silence as she took in everything that Ben had just admitted to her. First, she truly had earned her grade on his assessment. He respected her academic integrity enough to bring in a TA to grade his entire classes work, even after he had admitted to her earlier that he took his grading very seriously. Second, he admitted that the way he had acted with he r at his house had actually happened an d hadn’t just been her overanalyzing a strictl y platonic interaction. And third, he admitted that he did indeed have feelings for her. Feelings that were strong enough to get in the way of his grading abilities. Rey swallowed and looked up at Ben. 

“Kiss me,” she said in a near whisper. “Please.”

_____________________________________________________________________________________

Kylo stood staring at Rey in disbelief. “Rey,” he whispered in warning. 

He watched as her eyes dropped to his lips and he moved without a second thought.

Just as he was about to descend upon her, he heard Maz’s voice ringing out clearly from the other end of the hallway. “There you two are. I was afraid you scared my girl off,” she called out with a smug look.

Ren jumped back from Rey and she hurried over to Maz without looking back at him. “I got lost looking for the bathroom. Professor Ren found me and was just guiding me back to the party,” said Rey in a hushed voiced. “Sure, sure, my love,” said the older woman as she narrowed her eyes between them. 

Kylo could feel his throat tightening. ‘ _ What had just happened between them? Surely Rey was mistaken and hadn’t actually meant what she had said. There was no way that his dream girl actually had any interest in him of all people _ ,’ he thought to himself as he stood watching Rey and Maz walk away. He felt suddenly self-conscious, thinking about how beautiful Rey was and how awkward he must look standing next to her. He was a broken man. He was almost always in a bad mood. All of his features were too big, his hair was too long, he was too tall, and his face was speckled with beauty marks. He was in no way traditionally handsome and his personality left a lot to be desired. Yet for some reason, the girl that he had been obsessing over for the past few weeks had just asked him to kiss her. 

Ren brushed his hand through his hair and took a deep breath in an attempt to calm himself before returning to the table. ‘ _ Don’t fuck this up again _ ,’ he thought as he made his way down the darkened hallway. He had let her slip through his fingers one too many times and now he refused to lose her again. 

He returned to the table with a new drink for her, as well as one for himself. He could see the blush rising on Rey’s cheeks as she looked over to him, and the fact that he knew he was making her react this way sent a spark of heat straight toward his crotch. He pulled his chair into the table and extended his glass to cheers Rey. He watched as she bit her bottom lip before she picked up her glass to join him. He leaned in and whispered into her ear, “to us.”

Rey’s eyes met his in an instant and she seemed to be fighting a grin at the corners of her mouth.  Kylo’s eyes drifted away from her lips and back up to her eyes, noting to himself that her pupils were wide and she was staring into him with the same intensity she had when she made her proposal in the hallway. Rey swallowed then brought her glass to meet his with a quiet clink. Ben pursed his lips as he too attempted to hide a smile and he took a long s wig  of his drink before settling back into his seat and making himself comfortable.

Once dinner had been served , the traditional speeches had begun. This was usually a painfully boring part of the gala but with everyone’s attention turned to the speaker at the front of the room,  Kylo took the opportunity to covertly place his hand on Rey’s thigh. He watched as Rey opened her mouth in surprise but she continued to look forward and pretend to listen to the speaker. 

Liking the  way he made Rey react, he moved his hand slowly toward her knee then back up her thigh before giving her a gentle squeeze then pulling his hand away from her. He watched as a blush rose on Rey’s cheeks. She looked over at him once more, this time openly grinning at him. Ren bit the inside of his cheek and looked away from her coolly so as not to be seen smiling like an idiot at the beautiful girl next to him. As he looked around, his eyes suddenly met Hux’s from across the room.

If looks could kill, Ren most certainly would be dead as Hux shot him a venomous glare.  Kylo narrowed his eyes back, then raised his glass and looked away from him. He could tell that Hux was furious with him for embarrassing him in front of Rey and also for seeing him act inappropriately with a student. If there was anything Hux hated most in life, it was someone having something to use against him.  Kylo reminded himself to watch out for the little weasel, as the man would now be looking for anything to ruin him. 

Ren decided not to make any more moves on Rey for the remainder of the night, and to his surprise, the event ended sooner than he had hoped. Even if he couldn’t outwardly show his affection to Rey, just being in her presence and now knowing that she felt similarly was enough to keep him happy for an eternity. 

As the group stood and made their way to the door,  Kylo couldn’t help but be overcome with sadness. He wanted so badly to be by Rey’s side, and yet they had to part and he most likely wouldn’t see her again until class on Tuesday. Regardless, he reminded himself that she wanted him too and he would be willing to wait to see her again. Hell, he’d be willing to wait until the last day of classes to lay a finger on her if it meant he could be with Rey indefinitely after that. ‘ _ Would she even want that? What is this to her _ ?’ he thought as he followed the two women to the coat room. 

He didn’t know what his future held, but he was certain he wanted Rey to be a part of it. He really needed to speak with her about all of this the next time they got the opportunity. 

Ren helped Rey with her jacket, then did the same for Maz. He walked them out to their car and reluctantly said goodbye to them. “It’s always a pleasure, Maz,’ he said as he kissed her on the cheek and opened her door for her. ‘And you,’ he said quietly, resisting every urge he had to kiss her right there in the parking lot. Rey looked up at him for a moment, looking like she wanted to say something, but stopping herself. ‘I feel it too,’ he said in response, opening her door for her. ‘Get home,’ he said as he closed  Rey’s door and walked back to his car thinking about how it would feel to finally kiss Rey’s perfect lips. 

____________________________________________________________________________________

“So, you and Ben?” said Maz the  se c ond she pulled out of the parking lot and began driving back toward the diner. 

Rey was speechless. Nothing had actually happened between them, and yet Maz could already clearly see their connection. “He’s my professor, Maz. That’s all,” she said quickly. She tried her best to sound as disinterested as possible in order to try to throw the older woman off her track s . 

“And what exactly was he about to teach you when I found you two sneaking around in the shadows?” asked Maz incredulously. Rey blushed knowing exactly what Maz had seen. She had asked Ben to kiss her and she was fairly certain he was about to when they were interrupted. “I was lost,” added Rey in an attempt to stick to her story, but knowing full well Ma z would never believe her. “It seems you still are,” said the woman with a smirk as she kept her eyes on the road.

‘ _ Bloody hell _ ,’ Rey thought to herself realizing that Maz had already caught them before they had even had the chance to establish whatever relationship they had. ‘ _ Would she tell Leia _ ?’ she thought to herself as she chewed her lip nervously. Ben could be fired by tomorrow if so, and she could potentially lose her scholarship over something that never actually happened.

Clearly sensing the unease radiating off of Rey, Maz spoke up. “I’ve known Ben since he was a boy. I was there during all of it,” she said before hesitating. “He’s been lost for a very long time.” she added before taking a  considerable  pause. 

Rey looked out the window and brought her hand up to pinch the bridge of her nose. “I’ve never seen him as happy as he was tonight, Rey...with you,” she concluded. Rey swallowed as she digested what Maz had just said to her. ‘ _ Was she condoning their relationship? Was she actually happy about this _ ?’ she thought as her mind spun with this new information.

“I agree with what Leia said earlier. Perhaps when your semester is finished you two should consider pursuing something together. I think it might be impossible  not to ,” said the older woman as she looked over to Rey with a knowing glance.

“Nothing has actually happened, Maz. But I think you might be right about this connection being impossible to ignore,” said Rey thoughtfully. Maz smiled at the young woman and they continued the rest of their trip in silence.

Rey spent  that time thinking and concluded that as much as she wanted Ben, she would just have to wait until the last day of classes to pursue anything more. She regretted being so forward with him at the gala, but the thought of him reciprocating her feelings nearly drove her over the edge.

‘ _ Just try to forget about him for now. It will be easier in the long run _ ,’ she tried to convince herself as she entered her tiny apartment and poured herself a much need glass of water. Rey sat down on her couch and opened her school-issued laptop to check her emails, praying that she would be able to sleep tonight and not spend the entire night obsessing over the feeling of Professor Ren gripping her thigh.

As if on que, the only unread email in her inbox was one from Professor Ren. The timestamp showed that it had been sent several minutes earlier and she could see that he was still online. She opened it immediately and read:

_ “Miss Kenobi, _

_ I have set aside some time to speak with you during my office hours on Wednesday afternoon. I am aware that you were concerned about your quiz grade and I would be happy to review the syllabus as well as my grading criteria with you during that time. It seems as though you were apparently too distracted to listen when I went over it in class the first time. Please confirm that you will be able to attend this meeting at 1:45 pm on Wednesday. I look forward to clarifying things with you then. _

_ Best, _

_ Professor  _ _ Kylo _ _ Ren” _

Rey smiled to herself and shook her head. Ignoring him until the end of the semester may prover harder than she could have ever imagined.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! 
> 
> I promise the juicy stuff will be coming soon.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After both Rey and Kylo acknowledged the bond they shared while attending a gala, the two get into a heated argument.

That Tuesday,  Kylo found it incredibly difficult to keep his eyes from drifting to Rey’s during his lecture. She was wearing a cream-colored sweater and it reminded him of how she had looked the night of the gala in her tight-fitting white gown. He fumbled over his words more than normal and had to clear his throat to distract himself from thinking about what Rey had asked him for several times. When he felt himself begin to grow hard at the thought of his hand on her thigh, he sat behind his desk and asked his students to use the rest of the period to begin their reading assignment early.

He hated how his body reacted to Rey like a teenage boy’s, and yet he could not stop thinking about the beautiful girl who wanted him back. When class ended, several students came up to speak with  Kylo about what they had just read. He hated kiss-asses but he knew he had a job as an educator to at least pretend to be interested in what the students had to say. 

To his surprise Rey joined the group at his desk and he immediately had to sit down again in order to hide his hardening length. He heard a particularly irritating young man with glasses spouting off about how he believed that Robespierre was a hypocrite  and a true enemy to the  revolution, and he was pretty sure one of the girls who often tried to give him bedroom eyes had added some other banal conjecture. All he could focus on, however, was Rey. 

When he finally brought his gaze to meet hers, she smiled a genuine smile at him and he felt himself melt into his chair. The other night wasn’t actually a dream and the girl in front of him really did have feelings for him. 

“Professor Ren?” asked the girl with annoyance as she realized she wasn’t getting the attention she thought she deserved.  Kylo’s gaze moved quickly over to the girl and shot her an unintentional glare. He quickly tried to hide his annoyance and address the group of students in front of him. “Those were interesting points you made, but I think you should begin to think more critically about how the climate in France during this time led to the rise of Robespierre and men like him. If you have any further questions about the reading following next class, you can always make an appointment to speak with me during office hours,” he said as he began to gather his belongings, hoping the group got the hint to leave him alone.

“I’d love to speak with you more in depth,” said the blonde girl with the overdone makeup and low cut  t-shirt .  Kylo looked away from her and rolled his eyes before saying, “Great. Like I said, my office hours are posted outside my door. I have limited availability so please make sure to make an appointment if you really feel the need to Ms...” 

“Netal,” said the girl  who  appeared to be taken aback by his lack of recognition. “Okay, Ms. Netal. Have a great day,” he said in his most dismissive tone. “Ms. Kenobi, how can I help you this afternoon?” he asked exaggeratedly as he turned away from the blonde and gave Rey his full attention. He heard  Bazine Netal scoff angrily before gathering her bag and storming out of the room. 

“I just wanted to confirm our appointment for tomorrow. But it seems like you might be all booked up if  Bazine has her way,” she said with smirk. Ben laughed out loud and Rey beamed up at him wildly. “You never laugh,” she commented as they stood alone in his classroom once again staring at each other. 

“ Bazine has been relentlessly pursuing me since she was a freshman. I’ve shown her absolutely no interest and she still won’t quit. Avoiding her has become exhausting if I'm being honest,” he admitted to Rey as they slowly walked toward the open door. “Good luck with that,” Rey joked as she looked up at him. “I’ll try not to be too jealous,” she added before smirking at him and leaving the room. “She’s got nothing on you, Kenobi...” Ben called after her. “No one does.”

The next day couldn’t come soon enough.  Kylo and Rey needed to have a thorough conversation about everything that had happened as well as what they both wanted out of all of this. Ren knew he was head over heels for Rey and could see himself planning a future with her, but he wanted to know how Rey felt about them. He tried not to get his hopes up, but the thought of being with Rey , both physically and emotionally , was overwhelming.

Kylo had the morning off, but spent most of the afternoon fielding student  inquiries  about grades and repeatedly telling each of them that he didn’t offer extra credit. He hated when his students neglected to put the work in and then expected to be handed a golden opportunity to boost their final average. They attended  Corellia , an Ivy League university, and yet many of them still acted like any other desperate college student.

After a particularly annoying young man left his office in a huff,  Kylo found himself pinching the bridge of his nose in frustration and trying to just get through the rest of the day. When he heard a knock on his door he immediately groaned and shot the intruder a murderous glare. The person who entered, however, was no intruder at all.

“Rey,” he said with relief as he got up and closed the door behind her. Rey took a seat in one of the chairs in front of his desk and he remained standing but rested against the edge of his desk looking down at the girl before him.

Rey was wearing black high waited skinny jeans and a loose-fitting white t-shirt. She barely had to put any effort in and her beauty still astounded him. “Professor,” she said, greeting him with a  smile and a polite nod.

Kylo chewed the inside of his cheek and stood staring at her like she was a goddess, unable to come up with anything to say to her. Rey seemed to realize that he had frozen up and she broke the silence. “We should probably talk, Ben,” she said shyly as she looked down at her hands folded on her knees.

Kylo nodded in agreement and cleared his throat anxiously. ‘ _ Just get it over with _ ,’ he encouraged himself and he found the strength to look her in the eyes and  ask, “Did you mean what you said to me the other night?”

Rey’s eyes widened in surprise, but then she looked up at him and confidently said, “yes.”  Kylo gripped the edge of his desk firmly and continued his questioning. “How long have you wanted that?” He watched as Rey blushed and looked away from him before answering. “Since that night I asked you to stay with me,” she said in a shaky voice.  Kylo thought back to the way she had asked him to sleep in her bed and how badly he had wanted her in that moment. “What do you want from this?” he finally asked after a few moments of  uncomfo r table silence.

“You,” she stated matter of  factly . “Ben Solo,” she added, causing him to bit e his lip and look away from her. He was surprised when she was the one to break the silence next. 

“What would you have done if my phone hadn’t interrupted us that morning?” she asked, her eyes now searching his for an answer.

“Whatever you would have let me,” he responded honestly. He could see Rey’s eyes grow dark at his admission, but he tried to remain calm.

“Were you going to kiss me the other night before Maz found us?” she then asked. “Yes,” he said without hesitation. Rey stared at him as she  continued her questioning. 

“How long have you had feelings for me?” she asked and he brought his gaze up to meet her eyes. “Since the first night you stayed with me,” he reluctantly admitted, feeling like a creep for having almost immediately fallen for his beautiful student. ‘Why the mixed signals then?” she asked bluntly, causing Kylo to think about all of their interactions from the very beginning.

“I knew that feeling anything for one of my students was wrong. I kept trying to fight my attraction to you by pretending that I hated you or by ignoring you, but I just couldn’t keep it up. I want you Rey. So, so badly,” he said quietly. He hated how pathetic he must have sounded, but he needed Rey to know where he stood. 

Rey took a moment to analyze everything he had just told her then she began to speak again. “I don’t think you realize how much I’ve thought about you since we were stuck together during the storm. And I’m certain you don’t know how many nights I spent lying awake thinking about you,” she admitted while looking back down at her hands. “But I think it’s probably best if we wait until I graduate to pursue this relationship any further. If that’s something you’d be interested in of course. I’m not sure what exactly you expect to come from this,” she added in a shaky voice.

Kylo stared at Rey in disbelief. She wanted him. She wanted a relationship with him. She had been consumed with thoughts of him the way he had of her. Ben shook his head and let out a small huff while a smirk grew on his lips. He saw Rey’s face fall suddenly and he raced to clarify his feelings. “Sorry, I’m just still in shock that you would want anything to do with me,” he said smiling at the girl in front of him. Rey’s expression changed again, and this time she looked concerned. “Ben, you are incredible. Truly. You’re brilliant and charming and I find you very, very attractive,” she said in a serious tone. “You deserve to be happy. After everything you’ve been through and how far you’ve come, it would take a fool to not see how amazing you really are... Just ask  Bazine ,” Rey added with a smirk eliciting another genuine laugh from  Kylo .

“What am I going to do with you, Kenobi?” replied  Kylo playfully, wanting nothing more than to grab the girl in front of him and kiss her passionately. Rey looked up at him innocently and said “nothing until May.”

Kylo groaned and dropped his head back dramatically. “Fine, but after you graduate, I can’t promise that I’ll ever let you go,” he said in a husky voice as he brought his gaze back down to meet Rey’s. “I don’t want you to, ” said Rey as she began to stand and gather her belongings. 

Before turning to leave, Rey extended  her hand out for  Kylo to shake. “Until May,” she said confidently as she smiled brightly. Ren took her hand in his and shook firmly. “Until May,” he concluded and Rey turned to leave the room. 

“Wait, Rey,” he said without thinking. The girl turned to look at him with questioning eyes. “Can I have your number... Please. I promise I won’t hound you, but being completely cut off from you is maddening,” he  admitted, hi s voice tinged with an air of desperat ion . Rey let out a small laugh and walked back over to meet him at his desk. She held out her hand he gave her his phone. “There,” she said handing the device back to him. “But don’t make this harder than it’s already going to be,” she warned. 

“I’ll try,” he said to her as he let his eyes drop to her mouth. Rey bit her bottom lip in response, then turned and quickly left the room.  Kylo let out a long breath then moved around his desk to take a seat. He sat staring at the open door for a moment before he opened his phone and looked at the contact information Rey had entered  in . Instead of her name she had used the sun emoji. She was indeed a ray of light in his life and he still struggled to understand how a girl like that could have feelings for someone like him. 

_____________________________________________________________________________________

Rey was still on a high that night when she arrived home from her shift at Maz’s. Ben wanted her just as much as she wanted him and she was now counting down the day s until graduation. It was mid-February, so they only had a few more months to go. ‘A few more months,’ she repeated in her head, this time feeling frustrated. Rey thought about the way Ben had stared at her in his office, and the things he had admitted to her. She wanted him so badly but knew they needed to wait until neither of them could be reprimanded for their relationship. ‘ _ Fuck _ ,’ she thought to herself. This was going to be much more difficult than she could have ever imagined.

After showering and getting into bed that night, Rey’s phone vibrated. Her heart jumped suddenly when she saw that she had an incoming text from an unknown number. 

_ Goodnight, Kenobi. _

Professor Ren  didn’t have to say anything else. She knew it was him. 

_ Goodnight, Ben.  _ _ 😊 _

Rey  read and re-read the text exchange over and over again and each time her heart felt like it was doing somersaults in her chest.

May could not come soon enough.

Before Rey even realized, several weeks had gone by and they had already entered March. Her and Professor Ren had managed to act as normally as possible around each other and things seemed to be going rather smoothly. In fact, the only time her and Ben really interacted was every night before bed. He always texted her to ask how her day went and wish her a good night. Rey looked forward to this daily interaction, but she couldn’t deny the fact that she was growing more and more sexually frustrated. Especially when Ben looked so good in his button-down shirts and blazers. 

Rey found herself masturbating more frequently, unable to ever truly satisfy the longing inside of her. She began losing sleep again and found it increasingly irritating that Ben seemed to be  handling the distance much better than she was. 

One morning, after yet another sleepless night spent thinking about her professor, she decided to wear a slinky black tank top that she knew showed off her chest and hinted at her small breasts to his class that afternoon. She paired the top with a chunky grey cardigan, high waisted mom jeans and a pair of white Chuck Taylors. She had a French History quiz that day and new that Ben would have nothing to do all period except to stare at her. Her outfit was by no means racy, but she knew it accentuated her small curves and would hopefully remind Ben that she existed in real life and not simply via text. Before leaving her apartment, Rey took one final look at herself in the mirror and decided to wear her hair down. Hoping it would remind him of how she had looked the night of the gala with her soft waves kissing her shoulders.

When Rey arrived to Professor Ren’s class, she slowly made her way back to her seat. When she finally turned around, she heard Ben drop the pile of papers he had been holding and let out a quiet curse. His dark eyes met hers and she knew she had been the reason for his clumsiness. “Oh, please let me help you professor,” piped the shrill voice of  Bazine who was already bent over in front of him with her ass fully presented toward Ben. Rey could see that Professor Ren still had yet to take his eyes off of her, and she smiled smugly as she took a seat and slid her cardigan off .

Bazine neatly stacked the pile of quizzes that Ben had dropped and  she  seemed to take great pleasure in handing them over to him while not so subtly pressing her breasts together. “Something on your mind, Professor?” she asked flirtatiously as she remained in front of him twirling a lock of her golden hair in her fingers. 

Ben finally took his eyes off of Rey and glared at  Bazine . “Nothing that would concern you, Ms...” he said coldly causing  Bazine to angrily cross her arms. “Netal!” she nearly yelled as she stormed away from him and took her seat. Rey bit her lip so as to keep from laughing and  she sat  quietly, waiting for class to start.

Rey was fully prepared for this quiz and found it relatively straight forward. She finished the written assessment with several minutes to spare, so she closed the blue book on her desk and sat patiently. Suddenly, she heard her phone vibrate in her bag and she covertly reached in to see who had texted her and her eyes went wide.

_ Ben: You’re not playing fair.  _

Rey looked back up quickly and met his dark gaze. She should probably feel guilty for taunting him, but knowing she could elicit such a significant  reaction from him, turned her on even more.

_ Rey: I’m not sure I know what you’re talking about. I’m taking a quiz right now, so I can’t talk. Sorry... _

She typed back , watc h ing h im for a reaction as he looked down at his phone. Ben placed his phone on his desk and brought his hand up to pinch the bridge of his nose, then moved it down to rest over his mouth and support his chin. She watched as he slowly scanned the room and  when his eyes l anded on her she fought back a smile  when she  saw him shake his head slightly in  mock  annoyance.

When class ended, Rey was one of the first students to hand in their quiz and bolt out the door. She refused to give him the satisfaction of lingering around waiting for him to notice her, so she left.

That night after work, Rey received  a  text from Ben. 

_ Ben: What happened to making this as painless as possible until May? _

Rey could tell that Ben must have been a little annoyed with her, but she was relieved to hear that he at least  a c knowledged her existence in the real world.

_ Rey:  _ _ I still don’t know what you’re talking about _ _.  _ _ I always play fair. _

Rey saw Ben begin to type but then stop, only to start again.

_ Ben: I _ _ t _ __ _ was difficult to focus on anything else for the rest of the day _ _. I couldn’t possibly agree that this is fair, Kenobi. _

Rey stared at her screen  and smiled.

_ Rey: I’m sorry. It won’t happen again. _

She bit her lip and genuinely began to feel a little bad. 

_ Ben: I didn’t ask you to stop.  _

Rey smiled again as a blush began to rise on her cheeks. 

_ Rey: Goodnight, Ben. _

_ Ben: Goodnight, Kenobi. _

Rey laid back on her bed and grinned wildly, clutching her phone to her chest. ‘Only a few more months’ he reminded herself.

The next several  weeks crawled by and the only thing keeping her from going insane was knowing that spring break was quickly approaching. She planned to fill all of her free time working at Maz’s and hanging out with Finn and Poe. This would give her the opportunity to have some time away from the temptation of her upsettingly handsome professor, and offer her time to recharge.

On the Tuesday before break, Rey met up with Finn in the quad for lunch. She hadn’t been able to catch up with him for a couple of weeks and she hastily filled him in on everything that had happened between her and Ben.

“Wow, Rey. It sounds like he’s really into you,” said Finn as he raised his eyebrows. “From what I’d heard of him, I didn’t think it was possible for him to care about anyone,” he added with a smirk.

“Tell me about it,” she responded with a laugh. “I just can’t explain it. I know he’s... intense, but somehow, we complement each other perfectly. Plus, his mum likes me,” she said jokingly.

“I still can’t believe  _ he _ came out of that fabulous woman,” he responded shaking his head in disbelief. “It’s unnatural,” he added.

Rey laughed and rolled her eye. “He really isn’t as horrible as everyone says. I, for one, am madly... I mean, I have strong... I just really like him, Finn. And I'd love for you to meet him and get to know him one day. I guess when we’re actually able to pursue whatever it  is that we have,” she said, fumbling for the right words to express herself. 

Finn reached across the table and grabbed Rey’s hands. “Do you love him?” he asked sincerely. Rey blushed and looked away from him. “I... don’t know. I’ve never actually been in a relationship before. I don’t even know what it means to be ‘in love’ with someone,” she said pensively. Finn rubbed her hand with his thumb and smiled. “It sounds like you’re about to find out, Rey,” he responded smiling.

“I’d love to meet him. So would Poe. Maybe once May rolls around we can have you over to ours for dinner or drinks. Does he like board games?” he asked excitedly. Rey laughed and she reached across the table to hug Finn. “Thank you for not judging this ridiculous situation and for being a supportive friend.”

Finn rubbed her back and laughed. “I didn’t say this whole thing was n’t totally weird and bordering inappropriate, but who am I to judge? I’m dating my much older and much  grumpier  boss,” he said as they both let go and chuckled. “Plus, if he does anything to ever make you uncomfortable or upset, just know I’ll kill him,” he added half joking.

Rey truly was lucky to have a friend like Finn. Both of them had lived lives full of terrible people and terrible events before they got to  Corellia but once they met, they had developed an unspoken pact to protect each other from anymore hurt the world could throw at them.

After finishing their respective meals, Rey and Finn split up to attend their afternoon classes. 

Rey hurried into her French History class looking forward to stealing glances at Ben. After taking her seat and grabbing her notebook, she looked to the front of the room and waited anxiously for her professor to notice her. His eyes never found hers.

Ben never once looked over to Rey. In fact, it seemed as though he was completely ignoring her on purpose. She couldn’t help but begin to worry and as the end of class drew  near, she covertly sent him a text.

_ Rey: Everything okay? _

She watched as Ben concluded his lecture then glanced down at his phone. He seemed to hesitate for a moment before locking it and putting it into his pocket. ‘ _ What did I do _ ?’ she thought to herself in confusion. 

After Professor Ren dismissed the class, Rey purposefully lingered and waited for the other students to filter out. She slowly made her way toward his desk, but as she approached, he grabbed his things and left, leaving her standing alone in a dark classroom. Rey stood with furrowed brows not understanding what had just happened. ‘ _ Everything _ _ seemed fine yesterday _ ,’ she thought to herself as she remembered back to their nightly check in with one another. 

Rey didn’t have much time to think, however, as she had to hurry off to her shift at Maz’s. She made a point to try texting him later that night to try to figure out what was wrong.

When Rey finally got home from work, she immediately opened her phone and typed a message to Ben.

_ Rey: Hi. I hope everything is okay. You seemed upset this afternoon. Can we talk? _

Rey saw that her text had been read and anxiously awaited Ben’s response. 

_ Ben: No. _

Rey stared at his response completely taken aback. ‘ _ No _ ?’ she thought to herself. ‘ _ What do you mean no _ ?’

_ Rey: If I did something to upset you somehow, it's not exactly fair to keep me in the dark, Ben.  _

Her text was once again read, but she never received a response. ‘ _ What in the bloody hell did I do _ ?’ she asked herself, racking her brain for an answer. Rey thought back through her day but could come up with nothing. She felt hurt by Ben’s coldness and frustrated by his lack of Commnication. 

Rey decided the best plan of action moving forward was to give Ben the night to cool down, then try to talk to him during his office hours the next day. Spring break was the following week and she genuinely didn’t want to let this issue fester during that time. Whatever the  problem  was, everything would be okay, she said to herself in an attempt to mollify her rising unease. 

_____________________________________________________________________________________

Kylo struggled to get through the night without giving in to the urge to break something. After admitting his feelings for her and agreeing to patiently wait to be with her, Rey had grown bored and started seeing someone else. 

Ren clenched his fists tightly as he remembered seeing Rey that afternoon in the Quad. He had been tempted to go over and say hello, but then he noticed the boy she was with take her hand in his. The two seemed to be having a serious conversation and he immediately felt his heart begin to crumbled. It wasn’t until she stood up and hugged him across the table that he began to feel rage bubbling up inside of him.

Perhaps he should be happy that the girl had found someone her own age that she could openly be with, yet he found himself incapable of feeling anything but hatred toward her. To think that he had spent the past several months obsessing over Rey only to have her lead him on made the bile rise up in his throat.

It  took  two seconds for her to unknowingly break his heart. And in those two seconds, he realized he would never be happy every again. Ren felt himself spiraling, but he held it together long enough to make it back home and drown his feelings in a bottle of bourbon.

Rey had texted him several times asking what was wrong, but he refused to talk to her. He had seen everything he needed to in order to make  up  his mind . Thus, he decided to just be done with her and move on with his miserable existence alone, as it always should've been all along. He knew he had never deserved to be happy. This was just a cruel reminder of that fact.

The next morning Ren woke up late with a pounding headache. ‘ _ Fuck _ ,’ he thought to himself as he checked the time and saw that he had overslept.  Luckily, he didn’t have any classes that morning, but he needed to quickly get his act together in order to make it to his office in time for his appointments.

Once at work,  Kylo massaged the sides of his head in a desperate attempt to make the pounding stop. He opened his desk drawer and took a few Tylenol, making sure to finish the bottle of water he had grabbed on his way out the door. He let out a low groan as he rested his head against the back of his chair and he began to mentally prepare himself for a day full of student complaints.

After a few hours had passed, Ren began to feel better. He was able to grab a bite to eat and the pills he had taken earlier had finally managed to relieve  most of  his headache. What didn’t feel better, however, was his heart. Ren tried his best not to think about Rey, but he found it near impossible. ‘ _ How could she just move on so quickly _ ?’ he thought to himself. He closed his eyes and rubbed a hand over his face. ‘ _ There was something more to this. I thought she could feel it to _ ,’ he thought as he heard a knock on his door.

Standing there as if summoned was Rey. Ren remained seated and just stared at her. She had broken him and he genuinely didn’t know what to say to her. 

Rey closed the door behind her and apprehensively crossed the room, taking a seat in one of the  chairs in front of his desk.

Kylo bit the inside of his cheek and looked away from her, suddenly feeling unstable. There was nothing Rey could say to him that could fix this betrayal and he just wished she would leave.

“What did I do, Ben?” Rey asked in a pleading tone. “I can’t fix things if I don’t know what I did,” she added and  R en looked back to her and shook his head in disgust. 

“There’s nothing to fix,” he spat back , causing her to flinch at the harshness of her words. 

Rey’s brows furrowed as she continued her questioning. “What do you mean there’s nothing to fix. What about this?” she asked as she gestured between them. “I just don’t understand what happened.”

Ren stood up suddenly and leaned over his desk. “This,” he growled as he gestured between them “is nothing.” He watched as a tear rolled down Rey’s cheek. He almost felt guilty having caused her to feel upset, but then he remembered that she had been the one to betray him.

“That’s bullshit and you know it, Ben,” she said angrily as she stood up to try to meet his height. “You don’t get to pretend like we didn’t have something just because you’re upset!” she hissed.

“Oh, I don’t get to pretend like this didn’t exist, but you do? Don’t you think you’re being a bit hypocritical?” he spat back at her as he walked around his desk  a n d stood before Rey, in  an attempt to intimidate the girl before him. 

Rey shook her head violently and threw her hands up in front of her in frustration. “What in the bloody hell do you mean I pretended as though what we have didn’t exist? All I ever do is think about this!” she nearly yelled. 

Ren clenched both of his fists angrily and he paced away from Rey then came back to stop in front of her. “You really seemed to be thinking about ‘us’ when you were throwing yourself at that boy in the Quad yesterday,” he managed to say in a controlled voice, although there was currently a storm of hurt and anger brewing inside of him.

Kylo watched as Rey’s mouth fell open in shock. He had seemingly surprised her by witnessing her with another man, and now she knew the damage that her actions had caused. He was taken aback, however, when Rey began to laugh.

He was more confused when she continued to laugh even harder. Had this entire relationship been a joke to her? Had she been toying with him from the beginning? Ben began to shake his head again, hurt gripping his body and mind.

“Ben,” gasped Rey between hysterics. “Ben, oh my god. I’m so sorry,” she struggled to get out as she attempted to reign in her laughter.

“Get out,” he said coldly,  completely done with her absolute disregard for his feelings.

Rey reached forward and grabbed his arm. He looked into her eyes and instead of anger and confusion, he saw relief. “No, wait. Ben, that was Finn,” she said in her most reassuring voice. “My best friend. I’ve surely mentioned him before,” she added, firmly grabbing his other arm as well. “My very gay, very in love with his boyfriend best friend,” she clarified. 

Kylo immediately felt a rush of relief wash over his body. Rey had never betrayed him. She had never thrown what they had away and she had never gotten bored of him the way he feared she would. 

Rey moved her hand to his chest and smiled up at him. “Ben, we were talking about you. I told him how I felt about you and how I wanted him to meet you once things were official. I was telling him that I wanted you to be a part of my future,” she added softly. “He was just really happy for me. I’m so sorry if what you saw upset you, but...”

Rey never got to finish her sentence because  Kylo took a step closer and crashed his lips into hers. Rey rocked back unsteadily for a moment before pressing her lips firmly back into his. Ren brought both of his hands up to  cup the sides of her face as he kissed her, feeling like he needed her to survive. Maybe he did, he thought as she pressed her body against his and smiled into their kiss.

“I’m so sorry, Rey,” breathed Ren into Rey’s mouth. He moved his lips to the side of her face, then kissed down the long column of her neck. Rey let out a quiet moan and  Kylo brought his mouth back up to hers to swipe his tongue across her bottom lip. Rey opened her mouth to him and he dove in, deepening their kiss.

Rey ground her body against his hardening length causing him to buck into her. He moved one hand to gently grip the back of her head and his other to push against her lower back , pressing  her body closer to him. Rey threw her arms around his neck and ground into him again, this time moaning his name into his mouth. 

Ben could feel himself quickly losing control and wanting nothing more than to lay Rey back on his desk and take her right there in his office. 

Cutting his thoughts short, however, a firm knock on the door made both of them jump back from one another. Not a second later, Hux strode into the room looking down at his tablet. When he finally looked up and realized that  Kylo was not alone, he looked between him and Rey  suspiciously , attempting to assess the situation. 

Jumping  q uickly into action, Ren grabbed a random paper off of his desk and handed it to Rey. “Make the corrections necessary and resubmit the draft no later than this evening. Do you need anything else today or will you finally be leaving?” he asked in an irritated tone trying his best to hide the shakiness in his voice . Rey looked up at him with wide eyes, then quickly caught onto his act. “Thank you, Professor. I really appreciate your help. Next time I promise I'll make an appointment,” she said apologetically as she stuffed the paper into her bag and tuned to leave.

“Hux,” he said, finally addressing the man who had barged in. “You remember Ms. Kenobi , I’m sure. You two seemed to have really hit it off at the gala the other night” he added with a smug grin.

This comment made Hux visibly uncomfortable, causing him to step back from Rey, giving her more than enough room to pass by him. “Of course. Good afternoon Ms. Kenobi. I hope all is well,” he said nervously. Rey turned and  attempted to smile politely, but all she could do was sneer at the man. “I’m fine ... thank you Professor Hux ,” she said as she walked past him without a second glace. 

Once Rey had left the room, Hux approached  Kylo and stood before the towering man, glaring up at him. “What can I help you with today, Armitage?” asked Ren as he stood taller and attempted to look as menacing as possible. 

“How dare you mention my interaction with Ms. Kenobi the other night, especially in front of  _ her _ . Nothing happened. If anything, that w retched girl came onto me,” spat Hux as he puffed out his chest.

Kylo shook his head in disgust, but refused to push the incident further. He didn’t want Hux to somehow take out his frustration on Rey or for there to be any repercussions against her. “What do you want Hux?” he asked again, this time more firmly.

The red-haired man scowled as he looked up at Kylo. He was quiet for a moment before steeling himself and straightening the lapel of his jacket. “You need to get your TA assessment into me as soon as possible. I emailed you the digital review yesterday, but I had yet to hear back from you so I thought I would kindly remind you to complete it promptly,” he said in an admonishing tone. 

Kylo rolled his eyes and turned his back on Hux, making his way back to his desk. “It’ll be done by this evening. Can I help you with anything else, or are you just going to skulk around my office for the remainder of the day?”

Hux scoffed and turned to leave Ren’s office as quickly as he had come in.

Kylo hated the Red-haired man. He was a terrible supervisor, but more importantly, he had made Rey feel uncomfortable. For that he would never forgive him.

H is thoughts turned once more to the girl of his dreams. The dreams that had somehow become a reality. Ren brought a hand up to brush a finger along his bottom lip, remembering how Rey had kissed him back. She wanted this just as badly as he did, and the thought of that made him melt.

He felt guilt once more as he reminded himself of how he had treated Rey when he had wrongfully accused her of leaving him for another man. He made a mental note to make it up to her, and he gathered his things and began to pack up and go home. He didn’t have any more appointments that day, and the thought of potentially running into Hux again made him cringe.

As he made his way across the parking lot and to his car, he suddenly  pulled out his phone and did something he didn’t normally do.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IT'S HAPPENING!


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey and Ben go on their first date. 
> 
> (We finally earn our E rating here)

Rey was making her way across  campu s when she heard her phone ring in her pocket.  As she grabbed the  device she was taken aback by the contact that was currently calling her. 

_ Ben. _

Rey stopped in her tracks and fumbled with her phone as she pressed accept and held it up to her ear.

“Ben?” she said shakily, still recovering from what had just taken place in his office. “Rey. Hi,” said a familiar deep voice. “I hope I'm not bothering you,” he added. He also seemed to be somewhat on edge and struggling to sound composed. 

“Is everything all right? You... never call me,” answered Rey. She thought about the numerous texts the two shared but they had never once spoken on the phone together. For something so mundane, it seemed incredibly strange to her.

“Oh, no. I’m fine. Sorry about Hux. I hope seeing him didn’t upset you,” he said, sounding very serious. Rey let out a chortle. “I’m okay, Ben. I’ve encountered much bigger tossers in my life. I promise I don’t always need protecting.”

The line was silent for a few moments before Ben responded. “I know. I just care about you... which I guess brings me to my next questions,” he said hesitantly. 

Rey let out a breathy chuckle once more. “You’ve got me on the edge of my seat, Ben. Out with it,” she said, her  voice tinged with equal parts intrigue and anxiety.

“Will you go out with me?” mumbled Professor Ren quickly into the phone.  Rey was once again surprised by Ben. “ Wh ..what? Like be your girlfriend?” she asked nervously. “Or...or like go out on a date with you?” she corrected herself, now questioning what he had truly meant by his questions.

“I meant on a date with me, but yes both now that you bring it up,” he said with a breath of relief. “Rey, would you like to be my girlfriend? And also, are you free tomorrow night?” asked Ben with a new air of confidence.

Rey smiled brightly, unable to contain her happiness. The man she had  pined over for so long admitted that he wanted what she wanted. “Y. ..yes !” Rey exclaimed without taking more than a second to think about her answer. “On both accounts, yes,” she added. 

Ben let out a small chuckle on the other end of the line. “Good. Great. Can I pick you up at 7?” he asked, and she could almost hear the smile on his lips. “That sounds good. I’ll text you my address. But we should probably go out a few towns over,” she began to say but Ben cut her off. “I’m already on it.”

Rey continued smiling as she looked down at her feet and kicked around a small rock. “7 it is then,” she said with enthusiasm. “7 it is,” he added. “I’ll see you tomorrow, Ben,” she said reluctantly after a few seconds of silence, both seemingly unwilling to end the conversation. “Okay, yeah. Great. See you tomorrow, Rey,” he responded as if slapped back into reality. 

Rey could not stop smiling for the rest of the day. Her shift at Maz’s went by quickly and she could not wait to get home and pick out what to wear for her date. She didn’t own many nice clothes, but she knew she could pull something presentable together. Luckily, she was off Saturday, so she would be able to spend the day mentally preparing for her evening with Ben. Her only real concern was how expensive dinner would be, as she had very little spending money to spare this month. He knew she didn’t have a lot of money, so hopefully he'd pick somewhere low-key that she could afford.

When she finally arrived home that  night, she took out her phone to text Professor Ren, but before she could do so she saw that he had already texted her. 

_ Ben: I have to admit Rey, today made me less profoundly unhappy.  _

Rey smiled widely as she read his text and remembered back to the  note she had written him before this whole thing started. When she had written it to him, she never could have imagined that  _ she _ would be the one to bring joy to his life. But now that she was, she always wanted to make him feel that way. 

_ Rey: lol. In all seriousness, I’m really happy too, Ben.  _

Rey then proceeded to send Professor Ren her address and wish him a good night. She was always sad when their text exchange was over, but now she could look forward to her date the following evening. 

The next morning, Rey woke up earlier than normal, but more well rested than she had been in weeks. She was happy and that apparently did wonders for her sleep. After a quick breakfast, Rey spent most of the day working on several of her spring break assignments. It wasn’t until noon that she looked at her phone and noticed a text from Finn.

_ Finn: Drinks tonight bb? _

_ Rey: Hey! I’m actually going on a date with Ben later, so rain check? It seems as though we might have made things “official” a little earlier than either of us had anticipated. _

_ Finn: STFU! I knew neither of you would be able to keep it in your pants... I need all the details tomorrow AM! Don’t let him touch you if you don’t want to. I’ll murder him if he does anything wrong by you. You better text me later to let me know you’re home safe... or at his place safe. Wherever you end up, just let me know you’re okay so I don’t have to worry all night. _

_ Rey: Finn, I’m not going home with him. This is still all very new... We’re not even there yet. And he won’t do anything creepy! Stop worrying so much. But  _ _ yes, _ _ I’ll let you know when I’m home safe! Tell Poe I say hi. Xx _

_ Finn: Yeah okay, Rey. Whatever you say.  _ _ 😉 _

Rey rolled her eyes as she read Finn’s text, but then started thinking about what might happen after the date. Would she go home with him? Would they go beyond kissing? Was she ready for that? 

Being a virgin, Rey wasn’t exactly the most experienced person on earth. She had never been on a date, but she still knew what people did after them. The thought of having sex made her somewhat anxious, but she knew deep down that she wanted her first time to be with Ben. She had known that for a while, but her inexperience in that field made her nervous. ‘ _ You’re just going to let him down _ ,’ she thought to herself a she got ready to take a shower.

Rey scanned over her body in the mirror and grimaced. ‘ _ How could anyone actually find  _ _ this _ _ attractive? _ ’ she thought to herself as she analyzed her body. ‘ _ Your breasts are too small, you have no curves, and you’re too skinny _ ,’ she reminded herself as she thought back to all of the things that she had been told as she was growing up. Rey felt incredibly  self-conscious as she looked at herself and fought back the urge to cry.

Just then, her thoughts were interrupted by her phone receiving a text.

_ Ben: I’ve been thinking about you all day. I look forward to seeing you later. _

Rey stared at the words in front of her and suddenly she felt a wave of reassurance wash over her. Ben didn’t look at her the way she looked at herself or the way that the immature boys had when she was growing up. He always made her feel wanted. Sexy even. She thought about the day she wore the black camisole and how her presence alone had caused Ben to nearly have a breakdown. 

Rey smiled and responded. 

_ Rey: I can’t wait! _

With that, Rey made a conscious effort to stay positive and snap out of her self-destructive frame of mind. ‘ _ You deserve this. He deserves this. Just be happy and good to one another _ ,’ she thought to herself as she stepped into the shower. ‘ _ Just be you _ .”

After drying her hair and putting on a little makeup, Rey opted to wear a polka dot dress that she had found at the thrift store, along with some simple black heels that Poe and Finn had gotten her for her birthday. She never wore heels, but figured this was as good a time as any to start. She looked at herself in the mirror and for once she truly believed she looked beautiful. 

When she checked the time, her phone said 6:45pm. She suddenly didn’t know what to do with herself and she felt overwhelmed with butterflies. Rey was nervous, but mostly just excited to see Ben and possibly kiss him again. She hadn’t stopped thinking about how good it finally felt when he had surprised her with a kiss after their argument. All of the time she had spent fantasizing about her professor  had come true and she still couldn’t believe it. 

As she sat on her old bargain store couch thinking about Ben and feeling warmth flood to her core, a knock at the door snapped her back to reality. She was caught off guard, as she had expected him to call or text her to come down but once she thought about it, he had never been anything but gentlemanly with her. 

Rey shot up off of the couch, grabbed her bag and jacket, and quickly opened the door. She slipped out before he could get a good look inside her tiny, run-down apartment. When she looked up, her breath caught in her throat as she took in Ben’s appearance.

Professor Ren stood towering over Rey as he brushed his hand through his hair nervously. He was wearing all black and he looked equal parts sexy and dangerous. His hair fell perfectly tousled around his face and Rey could feel herself gawking. As she was about to force herself to say something, Ben spoke first.

“You look beautiful, Rey,” he said as a small smile crept across his lips. Rey felt the color in her cheeks rise and she beamed up at him. “And you look rather dashing yourself,” she said as she took a tentative step forward. 

Ben shook his head while grinning and looking away from her. Rey reached out and gently held the lapels of his black overcoat in her hands. “I mean it. You look rather handsome,” she clarified as Ben turned his attention back to her. She watched as his eyes grew dark for a moment as he stared at her intensely, then he reached a hand up to brush her hair behind her ear. 

“If we don’t leave now, I can’t promise I will be able to continue to act as honorably as I should,” he said, his low voice a warning.

Rey bit her lip as she felt warmth rising from her center once more. Her breath quickened as her eyes fell to his plush lips and she thought about the way his large hands would feel on her body. Rey was incredibly aroused, but equally nervous.

As if sensing her anxiety, Ben gently took her hand in his and proceeded to lead her down to his car. After letting her in, he took a seat and began driving them to their destination. Ben turned on a classical station, and the two rode the majority of the twenty-minute car ride in companionable silence. 

To her relief, the restaurant that Ben had chosen was several towns over from  Corellia and would most likely be completely free of any fellow peers or colleagues. To her chagrin, however, they were immediately met with the valet and she became suddenly aware of how nice the  restaurant he had chosen to take them to was. 

After Professor Ren helped Rey out of the car, she took his arm as they began walking inside. “Ben,” she whispered anxiously as she looked around the immaculately kept  exterior of the restaurant. “This is too... nice,” she said as she pulled on his arm slightly, causing him to stop walking and turn to her. 

Ben must have been able to read the insecurity on Rey’s face, as he placed a hand on both sides of her face and brought his lips to hers. He pressed a gentle but lingering kiss to her lips, then brought his face back slowly to look at her. “Rey, I wanted to take you here. Can you let me spoil you for once?” he asked with a smirk. “Please?”

Rey was still on could nine from their kiss as she tried to listened to what he was saying. “You already spoil me. Remember my car?” she said as she looked up at him raising her eyebrows. Ben pressed a kiss to her forehead and then wrapped his arm around her shoulders and continued to lead them inside. “That was different. Plus, now I’m allowed to do nice things for you and you can’t get mad at me. I’m your boyfriend,” he said cheekily as he opened the door for her and they made their way to the front desk. Rey rolled her eyes and reluctantly let him win. “Fine, but you have to let me do nice things for you later,” she said boldly, causing Ben to let out a quick breath and tense up. Rey smirked and then immediately turned her attention to the host and waited to be. All the while she could feel Ben’s eyes burning into the back of her.

Once seated, the two split a bottle of red wine and enjoyed a delightful meal together. She was often reminded of her first “date” with Professor Ren at his house, and she still couldn’t believe they were actually on a real one. “This was incredible, Ben,” Rey said as she took a small spoonful of chocolate souffle into her mouth. 

Ben stared as she innocently moaned in response to how delicious the  dessert was and when she opened her eyes, she watched him nearly choke as she innocently licked a bit of chocolate off of her lip. Professor Ren shook his head then and looked away from her. “You’re incredible, Rey,” he said in a husky tone. She realized then the way she had affected him and she fought back a smile. 

After Ben took care of the bill, much to Rey’s protesting, they made their way back to Rey’s apartment. As he drove, Ben placed his large hand on Rey’s thigh. She had never expected this type of contact to ever feel so normal, but Ben made her feel safe... and wanted.

Once back to her place, Professor Ren walked Rey to her door and they both stood awkwardly smiling at one another. “Can I kiss you again?” he asked with a sheepish smile, breaking the tension between them. Rey smiled up at him and nodded enthusiastically. 

The two met in the middle and shared a sweet but firm kiss. Ben began to pull away, but Rey kissed him again, this time more urgently. Ben returned the kiss with the same intensity and Rey opened her mouth to him as his tongue swept over her bottom lip. Ben deepened the kiss and Rey let out a small moan as he backed them up and pressed her firmly against her door. 

Rey could feel the wetness gathering in her underwear as she felt Ben press his body against hers. Without thinking, Rey wrapped one arm around Ben’s neck and the other fumbled with her doorknob. Remembering that it was locked, she broke away from the kiss for a moment to find her keys and open the door. “Wait,” she said as she suddenly remembered the fact that she lived in a rundown studio apartment in the bad part of town and he was incredibly wealthy and would probably be disgusted by her living conditions.

“We don’t have to do anything, Rey,” interjected Ben as he was evidently trying to read into the situation. “I’d honestly just like to hang out with you a little longer,” he added with a reassuring smile. Rey let out a small laugh, and looked up at him. She was actually relieved that he wasn’t expecting her to have sex with him, as much as she may have wanted to. She didn’t know if she was ready to cross that line yet, but the thought of him leaving her alone this evening after what had just transpired made her feel incredibly lonely already.

“Thanks, Ben,” she said with a shy smile. “I’d love to spend more time with you. It’s just... I have to warn you that my place...” she began but Ben placed a firm kiss to her lips. “I don’t care, Rey,” he said firmly. “We could literally be in a garbage dump right now, but as long as I get to spend time with you, I couldn’t care less,” he added as he lifted her chin to look up at him. “And even if you stepped in a gross puddle and had rotten banana peels all over your hair, I’d still think you were the most beautiful girl I’d ever seen...” he said. “And I absolutely detest bananas,” he added, making Rey laugh.

“Who doesn’t like bananas, Ben Solo? What’s wrong with you?” she asked playfully as she opened her apartment door and let him in. Rey held her breath as she waited for Professor Ren to scan her living space judgmentally, but his attention stayed focused on her. 

“Would you like the grand tour?” she asked nervously as she looked up into his eyes. Ben smiled down at her and nodded. “I’d love one, Kenobi,” he responded playfully and Rey led them several feet away from the door and to the kitchen space. Rey assumed the persona of a fancy hostess and gestured dramatically at the half-stove and single counter with a stool. “This is my elegant kitchen, as you can clearly see,” She said as she opened her fridge and waved a hand over the meager selection within. “Can I offer you some week-old white wine?” she joked as she took out the bottle and showed it to him the same way the server had at the restaurant. 

Ben chuckled and nodded in amusement. Rey found two mismatched glasses and poured them both a drink. Before taking a sip, Rey sniffed her wine and grimaced. It was just barely drinkable, but Ben didn’t even wince as he  gratefully sipped her offering. 

Rey then led them several feet away to the middle of the room and motioned toward the beaten-up couch and television. “This, my friend, is my luxurious entertainment... zone,” she began to say but Ben’s genuine laugh made her lose her composure and break  character.

“Sorry,” he said as he bit his cheek and attempted to mask his amusement. Rey beamed up at him as she took another sip of her wine and choked it down. “Oh god. This is really terrible,” she coughed. 

“None of this is terrible, Kenobi,” said Ben confidently as he took  another sip of his drink.

Rey’s heart fluttered as she looked at the man before her, clad in black and looking incredibly handsome. “Your coat!” she exclaimed suddenly. “How rude of me. Please, let me throw it in a ball over the stool,” she said sarcastically as she helped Ben out of his jacket. He laughed as she struggled to wrestle the garment off of his long arms, but she eventually freed him from it and draped it carefully over the arm of the couch.

Now that Professor Ren was free of his jacket, Rey could get a good look at him. He was wearing a tight-fitting black crewneck sweater, black pants, and expensive looking leather shoes. She swallowed as she took in the sight of him and felt her heartbeat quicken. She knew Ben must have a nice body beneath his collared shirts, but this sweater showed off how truly built he was.

Rey’s thoughts were disrupted by Ben clearing his throat. “Can I help you with your coat?” he asked in a low voice, a smirk growing on his lips. Rey felt a blush rise on her cheeks and she nodded to him. He gently eased her out of her old jacket and laid it next to his on the arm of the couch. “Shall we continue the tour?” he asked as his eyes found hers and Rey felt butterflies in her stomach.

She led them to the only door in her apartment and paused briefly. “This is the bathroom. And rest assured, it sometimes has hot water,” she joked as she flicked on the light to show him the room. Ben smiled at her, then followed her around a room-divider to her bed. Mattress, really, as she didn’t actually have a box spring or bedframe. 

“And this is the master suite,” she said as she nudged the edge of the mattress with her foot. Rey looked up at Ben nervously and saw that his eyes had once again gone dark. She then turned her attention to the bed before looking away and walking over to turn the bathroom light off. 

“I meant what I said, Rey,” said Professor Ren in a deep voice. “I don’t want you to feel pressured to do anything you don’t want to do,” he added in a serious voice. “I also don’t want you to interpret me not making a move on you as disinterest. I’m just trying to respect your boundaries,” he said as he turned away from her bed and walked back into the main living area. 

Rey was overcome with relief once more, and the thought of him not pressuring her made her feel much more comfortable with having invited him in. That didn’t mean, however, that she was completely naïve. Or completely unable to ignore the growing wetness in her underwear. She desperately wanted Ben to touch her and she craved the opportunity to explore his body as well. 

“What if,” Rey began but then hesitated. “What if you kiss me again and we stop when I need to stop?” she asked nervously, half expecting Ben to object.

Instead, he took a step closer to her and traced the side of her face with his fingertips. “I will do whatever you want me to do, Kenobi. I need you to understand that,” he said firmly as he looked into her eyes. “Whatever you want, Rey. Even if you were to ask me to leave, I'd do it without hesitation,” he added, not breaking their eye contact.

“I want you to kiss me,” said Rey as she was overwhelmed by the urge to have his body against hers again. 

As promised, Ben didn’t hesitate and he crashed his lips into hers. Rey brought her arms up to hook around his neck, and Ben placed his large hands around her waist. 

Rey licked along the seam of Ben’s lips, and he opened his mouth to accept her intrusion. She pressed her tongue against his and deepened their kiss.

Ben backed them up and pressed Rey against a wall and he canted his hips into hers, causing her to moan into his mouth. She could feel the hard length of him pressing against her core and her heartbeat picked up even faster. She had never been with a man or even seen a penis in person, so to have an erect one pressed against her center was both startling and exciting. 

Rey gasped as Ben broke away from her mouth and began to leave a line of sloppy kisses down the side of her neck. The sensation sent a shot of warmth to her growing wetness, but also made her bite her cheek from her ticklishness. She could feel Ben smile into her skin, before he began to nibble and suck at a spot just above her collar bone. The thought of being marked by Professor Ren turned her on even more, and Rey let out another moan as her hips bucked against him looking for pressure.

“Rey,” she heard Ben moan into her neck as she worked her hands in his hair. He brought his face back up to her and once again deepened their kiss. He thrust his hips into her again, and this time his hardness pressed against the spot she wanted to be touched the most. Rey sucked in her breath before letting out a desperate groan and Ben  continued his assault on her mouth.

As he kissed her, she felt his hands work their way along her sides then stop just underneath her small breasts. Rey realized Ben was waiting for her permission to move forward, and she nodded eagerly as she kissed him back with enthusiasm.

Ben brought his hands over her breasts and cupped them gently. Rey moaned as he massaged them, feeling her nipples harden under his touch. He surprised her then when he used his fingers to gently pinch one of her hardened peaks, feeling a shot of pleasure shoot directly to her center.

“You’re so perfect, Rey,” said Ben into her mouth as he pinched her other nipple and she canted her hips into his. 

She gasped then as Ben moved his mouth back down her neck, but this time he kissed a trail down to her chest. He stopped for a moment and looked up at her questioningly, before Rey nodded and Ben sucked one of her  nipples through the fabric of her dress.

“Ben,” moaned Rey as she savored the feeling of him sucking and nibbling on her, suddenly all too aware of the fabric that separated them.

Professor Ren looked up at her as she ran her hands through his hair, then he continued kissing down her body, stopping once he reached her hips. He slowly knelt in front of her and he reached down and caressed one of her legs from her ankle up to her thigh. He stopped when he reached the hemline of her dress, then  looked up at her.

_____________________________________________________________________________________

Kylo could not believe what was happening, let alone the fact that Rey would ever even consider letting him touch her, but here they were.

Kneeling in front of her with a firm grip on her silky thigh, he looked up at Rey for permission to touch her more intimately. Although every part of him wanted to take her then and there, he had no interest in doing anything that Rey wasn’t comfortable with yet. He was serious when he told her that if she asked him to leave, he would. 

As he looked into Rey’s eyes, she nodded her head and grabbed a handful of his hair and gently tugged. The tension sent a thrill to his hardening length and he delighted in the idea of exploring her more. His goal for the evening was to focus on Rey and what she wanted. He would hopefully be granted the opportunity for her to reciprocate in the future, but for now he took great joy in being allowed to pleasure her.

“If you want me to stop, just tell me to,” he said in a husky voice as he looked at her intently. Rey nodded again and brushed a stray hair behind his hear. “I want you to touch me,” she said quietly, causing  Kylo to let out a breath and attempt to gather his composure.

With her permission, he lifted her left leg over his shoulder and he left a trail of kisses from the inside of her knee to her upper thigh, just before the hemline of her short dress. Sparing a glance once more up to Rey, he looked at her as he slowly pushed her dress up, revealing her simple white panties.  Kylo couldn’t help but groan at the sight, and he brought his mouth down to kiss her right above the top of her waistband. 

Kylo felt Rey let out a quick breath and he looked up at her to gauge her reaction as he brought his hand up to gently brush along her core. He watched as Rey closed her eyelids and tilted her head back against the wall as he brushed along her folds again, this time noting how wet her panties were. “Fuck, Rey,” he mumbled as he kissed her waistline once more.

“Don’t stop,” she whimpered as he stroked her again.  Kylo swept his hand over her again, and Rey canted against his hand.

Kylo removed his fingers for a moment, causing Rey to open her eyes and look down at him just in time to see him curling his index fingers under the top of her underwear. Before pulling them down, Kylo looked up for permission and watched Rey swallow then nervously nod. “If you tell me to stop, I will. I want you to enjoy this as much as I am,” he said to her in a near whisper.

“I am,” she responded shyly as she nodded to him and watched.  Kylo could feel his erection throb against his pants and he let out a quick breath as he began to carefully roll her panties down her hips and legs, fully revealing her to him.

“You’re so perfect,” he said as he brought his hand back to trace her wet  slit . Rey was cleanly shaven and  Kylo loved that he could see all of her. 

Rey rutted against his hand once more as he gently stroked her. He took his time moving his fingers against her seam, then he delicately parted her lips and let his fingers travel down to her opening. He sucked in a breath as he felt the slickness coating his fingers. “You’re so wet, Rey,” he said as he moved his fingers up and found her clit.

Rey moaned as he slowly circled the sensitive spot and she gripped his hair tighter as he brushed his fingers over it. “Oh my god, Ben,” she moaned as he continued to tease her. 

“Can I kiss you?” he asked her as he brought his face back to look up at her. Rey furrowed her brows for a moment until  Kylo clarified. “Here,” he said  stroking her clit once more. 

He watched as Rey considered his proposition for a few seconds, as he began using his thumb to rub her. Rey moaned again, then nodded yes.

Kylo took a deep breath in order to try to calm himself down, then he moved his fingers out of the way and kissed the spot he had just been rubbing. Rey let out a whimper as Ren began  licking up her slit and tasting her. He savored her wetness and flicked her clit with the tip of his tongue, causing Rey to moan loudly.

As he licked her, her brought his hand up to trace her tight opening. He groaned into her clit as he felt how aroused she was. “Can I?” he asked between licks as he continued circling her hole.

“Yes,” Rey nearly yelled as she moved her hands down to his shoulders to support herself. 

Kylo licked Rey’s clit as he slowly sank a finger inside of her. “Jesus Christ, Rey,” he said realizing how tight she was. Rey moaned and tightened her grip on his shoulders as he slowly moved his finger in and out of her. As he did so, he could feel his erection screaming against the fabric of his pants.

After a minute or so of pleasuring Rey with his tongue and hand, he slowly sank a second finger inside of her. He felt Rey tense up at the intrusion, so he gave her a moment to adjust before slowly pulsing in and out of her. “Ben,” she moaned shakily as she brought her hand to the back of his head and fisted his hair. 

“I want you to cum for me, Rey,” he groaned into her as he began to speed up his ministrations on her clit. 

He could feel Rey’s body begin to shake and he knew her orgasm would soon follow, so he continued to work her with his mouth and fingers.

As Rey’s breathing hastened,  Kylo brought his free hand up to massage her breast, feeling her sensitive bud harden underneath his touch. He firmly tugged on her nipple through the fabric and he felt Rey begin to come undone.

“I’m going to cum, Ben. Please...” she panted as he continued to work her until suddenly, he felt her body tense up and her core clench his fingers. Rey threw her head back as she trembled wildly and Ben eased his flicks against her oversensitive nub.

As he felt Rey come down from her high, he slowly removed his fingers from her and placed sloppy kissed along her navel and the inside of her leg before easing it off of his shoulder and back down to the floor.

Kylo sat back comfortably and brought his knees up in front of him. He looked up at Rey as he wiped his mouth with his forearm then leaned forward and supported his arms on his knees. Both he and Rey were breathing heavily and the sight of Rey in an almost feral state nearly drove him over the edge. 

“You’re so beautiful, Rey,” he said sincerely. “Thank you for letting me touch you... and taste you,” he added as he licked his bottom lip and savored what remained of her wetness on him. 

He watched as Rey’s breathing began to relax, and she pushed herself off the wall to kneel in front of him. “Ben, that was amazing. I’ve never... I didn’t know you could... that was really incredible,” she said  shaking her head as she struggled to find the right words to express herself.

“I’m glad you liked that. I’d be happy to do it as often as you’d like for the rest of eternity,” he said with a grin. “You taste amazing, and I just really love watching you come,” he added as he reached out and placed a hand on her cheek.

Rey blushed and looked away from him before asking, “what can I do for you?”

Kylo was still getting used to the fact that Rey was attracted to him, so the prospect of her wanting to touch him as well shot right to his hard length.

“I’m fine, Rey. Tonight, was all about you,” he said. He truly meant that, and as much as his body yearned to be touched, he would be completely content with just falling asleep next to her.

“I... I want to,” she said nervously as she brought her gaze back up to him. Ren let out a quick breath as Rey leaned forward and kissed him once more. He almost choked when she then moved his arms out of the way and straddled his hips, deepening the kiss. And he could swear he almost died when he felt her featherlight touch brush against his erection.

“Rey,” he said warningly, as he broke their kiss and leaned back to look at her. He realized then that Rey’s eyes were almost black with lust and she pushed his upper body down to the ground, leaving him to support himself on his elbows. 

Kylo let out a short breath again as he watched Rey back down his legs and move her hands to his belt. He swallowed as she nimbly unfastened it along with his pants, and he stared in awe as she carefully worked his pants down his thighs. 

Kylo laid before Rey in his black boxer briefs, as she brought her hand up to run along the length of his erection. “You’re huge, Ben,” she said with wide eyes, as she felt him from base to tip.

Ren’s cock bobbed against her hand and she looked up at him in surprise. “Sorry. What you’re doing just feels really good,” he said in a strained voice. Rey beamed up at him before she continued gently stroking him. “I don’t actually know what I’m doing, so you will have to teach me...” she said as she looked up at him, her eyes dark once more. “Professor,” she added, causing  Kylo’s mind to go blank for a moment. 

“I need you to take me in your hand, Kenobi,” he instructed in a shaky voice. He was incredibly  aroused by Rey gently touching him and calling him Professor, and he was beginning to worry just how long he would be able to last.

Kylo let out a breathy moan as Rey slowly removed his briefs and finally took in the full size of him. “How is that ever going to fit?” she seemed to be asking herself out loud, but the thought of one day being buried deep inside of Rey made his large member bob once more.

“Take my cock in your hand, Kenobi,” he instructed Rey, watching as she bit her lip before reaching out to touch him. She gently gripped his tip causing him to moan loudly. “Fuck,” he said as she quickly released him and looked up. “No that felt good. Too good, actually. I want you to run your fist up and down me,” he said as he watched Rey move more confidently back to him.

She slowly worked his length up and down, and  Kylo dropped his head back in pleasure. “Good job, Kenobi, now I want you to use your other hand to gently massage the rest of me,” he said. Rey continued her ministrations and reached her other hand over to gently grip and massage his package. 

“Fuck... Yes, perfect, Kenobi,” he said as he clenched his fists and savored the feeling of Rey pleasuring him. “Now work my tip a few times before going back to stroking me,” he instructed once more.

Rey did exactly as she was told and  Kylo could feel himself getting close. It wasn’t until Rey spoke next that he opened his eyes in  surprise .

“I want to taste you, professor. May I?” she asked innocently as she focused on his tip for a moment. “Jesus, Rey,”  Kylo gasped as he nodded and watched her lick the precum off of him. She proceeded to lick the underside of his erection, as Ren dropped his head back once more.

“Tell me what to do, Professor,” she asked, waiting for him to give her further instructions.  Kylo let out a  disbelieving chuckle as he shook his head and watched Rey bite her lip. 

“See how much of me you can take into your mouth, Kenobi,” he said, and he watched as Rey did what she was told. He moaned loudly as she swallowed quite a bit of his length, then gagged on him, causing him to restrain a jerk.

Rey brought her head back up to look at him, and the sight of her red cheeks and disheveled hair was almost too much. “Work me with your hand and mouth. You’re going to make me come,” he said, and Rey did just that.

The warmth of Rey’s mouth and throat felt amazing around him and he could feel himself quickly losing control. “I’m going to cum, Rey... just use your hand,” he said between labored breaths.

Rey didn’t relent, however, and she continued to work him with her mouth. “Fuck, Kenobi,” he said as he felt himself topple over the edge and send ropes of hot cum down her throat. Rey continued to gently pump him until his body stilled beneath her, she then slowly lifted herself up and wiped her mouth.

Kylo let out a breathy laugh in disbelief as he took in the sight of her. Rey’s cheeks were red, she had a tiny glisten of sweat on her brown, her hair was unkempt, and she looked more beautiful than he had  ever seen her.

“Thank you, Rey,” he finally said as he continued staring at her. “Was that okay?” she asked nervously, as she looked back to him. 

“Okay? Rey, that was amazing. Really, thank you,” he  replied  as he took a deep breath and let out another chuckle.  “I just hope that wasn’t too much for you...” he began to say but Rey smiled and shook her head. “That was all... amazing,” she said with a grin. “I’m glad I could experience that for the first time with you. I’ve wanted that for some time,” she admitted as she blushed and attempted to fix her hair.

“Come here,” said  Kylo with an equally big grin, opening up his arms to her. She quickly took the invitation and let her body fall gracefully into his and she wrapped her arms tightly around his middle.  Kylo sat hugging Rey and he placed his face into the base of her neck and let himself smile widely.

“Would you like to stay over?” Rey asked into  Kylo’s shoulder, causing him to put  space between them to look at her. “I’d really like  that,” he answered and watched as her eyes lit up.

The two spent the rest of the night watching a movie on her couch and fell asleep in each other's arms.  Kylo had never felt so at home or wanted by anyone in his entire life and when he woke up the next morning to Rey snuggled up against him, he knew he never wanted to wake up without the girl next to him. 

Rey had to work the morning shift at Maz’s Diner that day, so  Kylo left Rey’s apartment after the two split a cold  Poptart and spent several minutes kissing each other passionately.

Leaving Rey was absolutely the hardest part of his day and would prove to be the most difficult part of his week as she had to work doubles for the rest of Spring Break. They agreed to meet up again once classes started back in a week so Rey could still have time to work on her projects, but the thought of not seeing her rocked him to his core.

By Wednesday of that week,  Kylo felt himself  short-circuiting . All he could think about was Rey and how much he missed being with her. 

He occupied much of his time working out or reading, but his desperation to connect with her caused him to begin texting her throughout the day rather than keeping strictly to texting her at night. At this point he was well over his head with his feelings for her, so he figured that strengthening their connection now wouldn’t make this any harder than it already was. 

At roughly 10am,  Kylo heard his phone vibrate from a text and he stopped his cardio workout to respond to Rey. 

_ Leia: Ben. Let’s catch up. Lunch today? _

Kylo looked at the text from his mother and audibly groaned. The last thing he wanted to do was to meet up with his mother and field the thousands of uncomfortable questions she surely had lined up for him. They hadn’t spoken since the gala and he was sure she would bring up Rey at some point. The thought of which caused a bit of anxiety to rise up in his throat because he knew that he would never be able to hide his true feelings about the girl from his mom. She had an uncanny ability to always see right through the stoic façade he had masterfully crafted. But again, he reminded himself that ignoring her was always a terrible choice. She would just show up at his house then and if she showed up  there, he had no escape from her. At least he could leave lunch early.

_ Ben: Okay. _

_ Leia: That’s the spirit. I’ll pick you up at 11:30. My treat. _

_ Ben: No, Mom. I can drive myself. _

_ Leia: Nice try. I’ll be there in  _ _ an _ _ hour and a half.  _

_ Ben: Fine. _

Kylo rolled his eyes as she had clearly anticipated his escape plan and he finished his workout then showered, just in time for Leia to arrive. When he saw her white Tesla pull up, he quickly bolted out the door, eager to get this lunch date over with.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you as always for reading. This chapter was a little nerve wracking to write, but I hope you enjoyed my trip into smut. 
> 
> Comments and feedback are always welcome!


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey spends the night at Ben's.
> 
> (Fully E chapter)

“Hey, kid,” said his mother as he opened the door and got inside her car. “Hi, mom,” he grumbled in response. “It’s been a while,” she added as the two pulled away from his house and began to drive to their destination.  Kylo continued to keep his attention out the window and focused on the passing homes and wooded areas. 

“Are you hungry?” she asked after a few minutes of uncomfortable silence had passed.  Kylo rolled his eyes then looked over to his mom and muttered a begrudging “I guess.”

Although  Kylo loved his mom, he hated spending time with her. He knew that she still resented him for what had happened with his dad, but she was undyingly loyal to her duty as a mother. It was clear that she forced herself to actively make Ren a part of her life after they moved to Massachusetts, and he was humiliated that she had been forced to dismantle her life in order to come to his rescue after everything erupted in New York. She had seen him at his lowest point. She had seen his weakest moment. She had been the one to stand him back on his feet. He owed her his life and whenever he saw her, he was reminded of this sad fact.

“Good,” she responded happily as they made their way out toward his go-to liquor store. He was so lost in thought about what he would need to drink once he got home in order to decompress from lunch with Leia, that he only registered they had made it to their destination when he heard his mother slam her door closed.

As he got out of the car he nearly died when he looked up and realized where they were. “Best food in town,” said Leia as she made her way into Maz’s Diner, leaving him staring at the entrance. ‘ _ Rey _ ,’ he thought to himself in a panic. There was no way he was going to be able to act like a normal human being if located anywhere near the girl. She populated his every waking thought and wildest fantasy. She was his other half and he wanted nothing more than to scream that to anyone who would listen. But now he would be forced to ignore his feelings and stomp out the only happy part of his life in order to protect what they had. 

“Fuck,” he mumbled under his breath as he walked in the door, hating how the bells above the entrance demanded attention from everyone inside. 

“Ben Solo!” he heard Maz shout loudly across the diner, causing anyone who hadn’t looked up at the bells, to now eye the newcomer.  Kylo smiled politely to Maz and scanned the diner for his mother. He found her seated at the counter checking her emails on her phone, and standing just behind the same counter was Rey.

Kylo gawked openly at the girl, who somehow managed to still look stunning even while wearing a uniform. Rey smiled widely in return and he bit the inside of his cheek in an attempt to not  completely give up their relationship. 

Kylo took a seat next to his mother who was still laser focused on her phone, and he spared Rey another glance as she quickly placed a glass of water in front of him. “Miss Kenobi,” he said as he nodded to her, causing her to smile once more.

Ren tried to calm himself by taking a sip of water, but he inadvertently choked when he heard Rey politely say, “Professor.” He had instantly been reminded of the way she called him professor in between taking him into her mouth and letting him cum in her throat, and he couldn’t handle it.

“Breathe, Ben. Jesus,” his mother scoffed as she finally looked up from her phone and put her glasses back on. Once he had recovered, he looked up at Rey who was clearly enjoying the scene and holding back laughter. He shot her a half-hearted glare and then pretended to read the menu in front of him.

“Rey, love. How are you, my dear?” Leia proceeded to ask Rey as  Kylo attempted to ignore the two women. “I’m doing splendid... Mrs. Organa. I hope you’re doing well?” she asked as she leaned over the counter to chat with the older woman. 

Kylo looked up and clenched his fists as he fought the urge to catch a glance at her slight cleavage. ‘ _ Hold it together, idiot _ ,’ he internally scolded himself. Forcing his gaze to stay on the menu.

“Leia, dear. I hope my Ben here isn’t being  too hard on you this semester,” said his mother, as he shook his head slightly at her poor use of terminology. He shot a look to Rey who had blushed slightly, then looked back down at the menu. “No, no. He’s been... ever the masterful educator. In fact, this semester he’s been using a TA to take on his grading and some of us have actually managed to finally get A’s on some of his assignments,” she joked, causing his mother to raise her eyebrows in surprise. 

“Is that right, Ben?” asked Leia as she looked over to her son. “Yep,” he said shortly, refusing to broach the topic. “Well then I’m happy to hear you’re doing well. I’ve heard your name thrown around quite often with regard to the engineering department. You should be proud of the work you’ve been doing at  Corellia , Rey,” said his mother, her attention turned back to the beautiful girl standing across the counter from them.

“Thank you, Leia. That means a lot, especially coming from you,” said Rey. He could hear the smile on her lips as she happily accepted his mother’s sincere compliment. “I’ll give you a few minutes to decide,” she added as she hurried out from behind the counter and attended some of her other tables.

Leia picked up her menu and began to skim  it. “A TA, huh?” she questioned as she let out a little knowing huff. “Hux has been pestering me about taking on a TA for several semesters. I finally decided that I couldn’t bear to have him hold one more thing over my head to pester me about,” he said flippantly as he closed his menu and took another sip of water. He refused to look at his mother, knowing full well that she would be able to see through his lie. 

“You sure it doesn’t have anything to do with a certain waitress you’ve been struggling to avert your gaze from since you sat down?” she asked with a knowing tone.  Kylo shook his head and refused to answer her, thankful when Maz popped over to say hello.

“Benny!” she exclaimed as she leaned against the counter and greeted them. “Maz,” he said politely as he spent an agonizingly long time trying to look at anything except his mother... or Rey.

“You never visit me anymore. It hurts my feelings, you grumpy old man. Come by more often and let me feed you,” she said as she put down place settings for him and his mother. 

“I invited him for lunch to catch up,” interjected Leia. The two women smiled at each other, but Maz’s attention was quickly called away by someone asking for her in the kitchen. “Well, it’s nice to see you back here Benny. Your meals are on me today,” she said as she disappeared into the back of the restaurant.

Kylo could feel his mother’s stare burning into him, be he refused to participate in the conversation she clearly wanted to have. Especially not with Rey so close by.

Not a moment too soon, the very girl he was trying to ignore popped back over to take their orders. To his relief, his mother seemed to drop the line of questioning she had initially started, and the two managed to make forced small talk for the rest  of their meal. 

Although Maz covered their bill,  Kylo offered to be the one to leave Rey a tip. His mother just smiled and nodded as he left forty dollars on the counter, way more than the cost of their food combined. He knew Rey would be annoyed, but he didn’t care. As they made their way out the door,  Kylo and his mother exchanged pleasantries with Maz and Rey and headed back to his house. 

Kylo let out a breath of relief as he sat down in the car, but Leia didn't give him much of a respite before bringing up the topic he wanted to discuss the least.

“So, are you going to be honest with me about your TA situation, or are you going to stick to your bullshit excuse?” she asked bluntly as they pulled out of the parking lot.  Kylo groaned and dropped his head back against his headrest. “I’m not talking about this anymore,” he said flatly, hoping that she could understand his unwillingness to broach the topic.

Leia didn’t speak again until they stopped in front of his house. As  Kylo unbuckled his seatbelt his mother spoke one more. “You love her,” she said confidently, causing  Kylo to look up at her in shock.

How could she have known something that he hadn’t even admitted to himself yet? 

Finding himself at a loss for words, and also wanting desperately to protect Rey, he said “She’s my student.” Leia looked at him and smiled. “That’s not what I said, Ben,” she responded with a shrewd chuckle. 

Kylo pursed his lips and shook his head in disbelief, still unwilling to give her verbal confirmation of a fact that he hadn’t given himself the opportunity to consider yet. 

With seeming clarity of the situation, Leia put her hand on his and squeezed. “Be good to her but be careful, Ben,” she said half  reassuringly and half in warning.

Kylo nodded in understanding, then got out of the car without another word. Of all people that he could’ve revealed his feelings about Rey to, he was  shocked that he had silently admitted being in love with Rey to his mother. 

As he walked to his door, he couldn’t help but smile as the fact that he was in love with Rey began to come to the forefront of his mind. He didn’t know when it had happened, but at some point, he had fallen deeply in love with the girl from his class. The girl who saw through his walls and accepted him for all of his flaws and mistakes, even after knowing everything that he had been through. He loved the brilliant orphan from  Jakku and he knew in that moment that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with her. 

‘ _ Does she love me _ ?’ he thought to himself as he took out his phone to text Rey and apologize for the surprise visit at work. He hesitated as he typed, worrying that there was always a possibility that she didn’t have strong feelings for him back. ‘ _ She's about to graduate, then what _ ?’ he asked himself, beginning to realize that he was stuck at  Corellia , while Rey would be free to  leave and go wherever she pleased. ‘ _ She’s going to leave you, _ ’ he began to say to himself, but his sudden nosedive into self-pity was interrupted when Rey texted him before he could compose his own thoughts.

_ Rey: I’m so happy I got to see you today!  _ _ 😊 _

Kylo couldn’t help but smile from her attention as well as her contagious  optimism .

_ Kylo _ _ : Sorry I didn’t warn you. My mom ambushed me. _

_ Rey: lol. It’s alright. Any excuse to see that  _ _ sour _ _ mug of yours is always welcome. _

_ Kylo _ _ : I’m glad I got to see you too... _

_ Kylo _ _ : I’ve been thinking about you more than I’d like to admit. _

_ Rey: Oh really? _

Kylo couldn’t help but laugh at Rey’s cheekiness. 

_ Kylo _ _ : Really.  _

_ Rey: Care to  _ _ elaborate _ _? _

Ren stared at his phone not knowing what to say next. He couldn’t stop thinking about how strong his feelings for her, or the overwhelming fear that she would leave after she graduated and never feel the same way about him. He wanted to convey all of these feelings and concerns to her, but he didn’t want to scare her away. He also absolutely did not want to do this via text message.

_ Kylo _ _ : _ _ Perhaps Tuesday after class? _

_ Rey: Ugh, okay. That’s too far away. Sorry my schedule is rubbish.  _

_ Kylo _ _ : You never have to apologize to me, Rey.  _

_ Rey: I might need to after I smack you for leaving me a  _ _ ridiculous _ _ tip. _

_ Kylo _ _ : What can I say.  _ _ Your _ _ service was exceptional. _

_ Rey: Yeah, yeah. You’re lucky I like you. _

Kylo swallowed as he re-read the text exchange. ‘ _ I like you _ ,’ she said. Not love. Maybe never love. This was something he was just going to have to prepare himself for. This is why he never dated until Rey. He could never understand why people would get themselves invested in relationships only to be tossed aside by someone they cared so deeply about. ‘ _ Rey is different, _ ’ he tried to remind himself as he felt himself spiraling. ‘ _ She likes you. Maybe one day she will love you and you can figure out where to go next in life _ ,’ he said to himself as he tried to be  optimistic . 

_ Kylo _ _ : I like you too, Rey. _

_____________________________________________________________________________________

Rey stared at the text from Ben for far too long. He liked her. This should make her happy, but deep down she knew that her feelings for him went much further than simply ‘liking’ him. When he had walked into the diner that afternoon, she nearly ran over and grabbed him and refused to let him go. 

It had caused her heart to break a little when they had parted the other day and she wanted nothing more than to be in his arms once more. 

After finishing her shift at Maz’s, Rey made her way home and tried to get some of her assignments completed before the end of the week. If she could get them done now, she would be able to possibly see Ben after  one of her shifts if he was willing to hang out with her that late.

As she worked into the night, her attention was broken when she heard her phone buzz with a text. 

_ Finn: Free  _ _ Friday _ _ after work? _

_ Rey: If I can get this project done tonight, maybe. What’s up? _

_ Finn: Feel like coming over for drinks with that tall and brooding boy toy of yours? _

_ Rey: I thought we were going to wait until the end of the semester. _

_ Finn: Yeah, well I thought you were going to keep it in your pants until then too. _

Rey couldn’t help but laugh at the fact that her and Ben had failed so miserably at staying away from  each other until graduation. 

_ Rey: Rude, but accurate. _

_ Finn: So _ _ , _ _ are you in? I got Poe a crockpot for his birthday and th _ _ e _ _ fact that he hasn’t gotten to use it yet is causing him physical and emotional pain.  _

_ Rey: Let me see if he’s around _ _. _

Rey bit her lip before texting Ben. It was 11:30pm and she figured he might be asleep, but she genuinely wanted another excuse to see him before classes began again. Plus, they wouldn’t have to drive two towns over to go out together.

_ Rey: Hi. I know it’s late, but _ __ _ Finn _ _ , _ __ _ yes that Finn,  _ _ invited us over on Friday to have some drinks and hang out. I know we can’t really go out together yet, but his place is safe and it could be fun. Plus, it’s an excuse for you to finally meet the guy you thought I was double timing you with.  _ _ 😉 _

Rey smiled as she thought back to how upset Ben had been when he had seen her with Finn and how he had reacted when he found out he was her gay best friend. That had been the first time they kissed. Not a moment later her phone buzzed again. 

_ Ben: I’m a thirty-year-old man, not eighty. I don’t always go to bed when the sun sets, Rey.  _

_ Rey: Whatever you say, old-timer.  _

_ Ben: I’m free Friday. Want me to pick you up? _

_ Rey: Sure. I should get out around 9:30pm. Want to meet at my place around 10pm and head over?  _

_ Ben: 10pm it is. _

_ Rey: Great! I’m excited to see you. _

_ Ben: Goodnight, Rey. _

_ Rey: Night, Professor. _

Rey smiled as she texted Finn back to tell him that they would be joining them. Finn expressed his enthusiasm in interrogating Ben and she fought back a smile when she begged him not to embarrass her. 

That night, Rey stayed up much later than she wanted to in order to finish her work, but the prospect of seeing Ben on Friday motivated her to complete her tasks. By the time she got into bed, she had only a few hours to sleep before she had to get up again. 

The next two days flew by as Rey worked like crazy to pass the time. When she finally got out Friday night, she raced home to jump in the shower and make herself look somewhat presentable before Professor Ren got to her apartment. Once out, she dried off and pulled her hair into a half-top knot and put on some mascara and a red lip.

Just as Rey was pulling on a black sweater and tucking it into her skinny jeans, she heard a knock at the door. As she quickly answered it, she smiled widely  seeing Ben st anding  before her. He was wearing a dark plaid shirt under his black jacket, and he had on black jeans and vans. He was barely trying and yet he still looked incredibly handsome, which caused Rey to rush into him and kiss him firmly.

Rey felt as Ben melted into her and kissed her back. He held either side of her face in his large hands and smiled into their kiss. Reluctant to break their connection, Ben was  the first to take a step back and properly greet Rey.

“Kenobi,” he said with a grin, causing her to blush. “Hi... Sorry for attacking you,” said Rey apologetically as she led them back into her apartment so that she could grab her jacket. 

“I told you never to apologize to me, Rey,” he said firmly as he leaned against the frame of her door. “Especially not for kissing me,” he added, causing Rey to bite her lip as she slipped into her jacket and grabbed her bag. 

The two left Rey’s apartment and made their way down to Ben’s car. He opened her door for her, as always, and they arrived at Finn’s place ten minutes later. Before getting out of the car, however, Rey attempted to prepare Ben for what he was getting himself into. 

“He’s going to interrogate you. He’s my best friend, and I care for him dearly, but he thinks it’s his job to assess whether or not you’re ‘good enough for me.’ Those are his words, not mine. Just be yourself... well your ‘not grumpy’ self, and he will love you!” she said hastily as they got out of the car. “And don’t let him talk  to you about  politics. My god, he won’t shut up,” she added as she rang the doorbell. “Got it” he said as the door swung open and Finn grabbed Rey into a bear hug.

“If it isn’t the most perfect angel,” he said finally letting her go. “Hi, Finn,” she said smiling widely. “I’d like you to meet Ben.” Rey gestured to Ben before adding “my boyfriend.” 

Finn shot her a knowing look and smiled at Ben, and extended his hand. Ben offered Finn a shake and thanked him for having them over. “My pleasure. Rey has told me all about you, and I’m so happy to finally meet you,” he said as he welcomed them into his apartment and took their coats. 

Finn called Poe into the room and the shorter, extremely handsome man gracefully entered the room. “Rey, so happy to see you,” he said coolly then turned his attention to Ben. “And you must be Ben, “he said as he extended his hand for a shake.

The group exchanged pleasantries and Poe offered the two some mulled wine he made in his new crockpot. The spiced drink was delicious and Rey immediately felt warm all over. “This is wonderful Poe, thank you,” said Ben as Finn led them into the living  room to take a seat on the sectional.

The foursome chatted and Finn caught Rey up on his life. Poe and Ben sat quietly discussing a new book that they both had read, and Rey smiled as she watched the  man she loved get along swimmingly with her friends. When she looked back to Finn, he was staring at her intently and grinning. “Let’s get another drink,” he whispered to her and the two snuck away to the kitchen to talk.

“You love him,” said Finn confidently the moment they were out of immediate earshot of their partners. “What?” asked Rey, genuinely taken aback by his astuteness. “You love him,” he repeated confidently, pouring them two more glasses of wine. 

Rey bit her lip as she considered what to say next. “It’s okay, Rey,” he said as he handed her back her glass. “I like him,” he said as he put his arm around her shoulders and turned them to look at Poe and Ben chatting. “Look at our men. All nerdy and debonair,” he added as they walked back into the living room making her laugh, the feeling of butterflies in her stomach as she made eye contact with her date .

Rey and Ben spent a couple more hours at Finn’s place, before leaving to head back to her apartment. Their outing couldn’t have gone any better and Rey was feeling very buzzed and very happy.

Once they got back to her place, Rey invited Ben to stay over and he enthusiastically accepted. She felt herself stumbled a bit as she tried to take off her jacket, and Ben’s large hands appeared from behind to steady her. Rey loved the feeling of his hands on her and she leaned her head back against his firm chest.

“I hope you had fun tonight,” she said as she leaned up against him and yawned. “Any night with you is a good night, Kenobi,” replied Ben as he brought his hands up to pull her back into his chest and hug her. He rested his lips on her shoulder and Rey brought a hand up behind her to stroke his hair.

“You need to drink some water, then we should get some sleep,” mumbled Ben into the fabric of her sweater. Rey groaned, causing Professor Ren let out a low laugh. “Yeah, well if you don’t drink about three glasses of water before you go to bed, you’re going to have a killer hangover tomorrow,” he said as he gently released her and headed toward her kitchen. Rey reluctantly turned around and followed him as he handed her a glass of water. “Drink,” he said as she took the glass from him and  grimaced .

Rey eventually did what she was told then made her way to the bathroom to wash her face and get ready for bed. When she got out, she saw that Ben was already stripped down to his boxer briefs, and she suddenly felt very warm. Rey thought for a moment, before she grabbed an oversized  t-shirt from here drawer and began to strip off her shirt. 

Although Ben had teased her breasts, he had never actually seen them. She turned away from him as she stripped of her bra, and she heard his breathing faulter. She took her time as she pulled the t-shirt over her head, then she turned around and took off her pants. The shirt was just long enough to cover her, so she slid her underwear off as well and left them in with her clothes in a pile on the floor.

Rey quickly turned off the light then hopped into bed with Ben. She turned to him and he kissed her firmly before turning her around to spoon with her. She couldn’t help but notice his erection pressing into her backside and she pushed gently against it. She heard Ben let out a little moan before he stilled her hips with his hands. “Go to bed, Rey,” he whispered and pressed a light kiss onto the side of her neck. Rey smiled and closed her eyes, falling sleep much more quickly than usual as she laid wrapped in Ben’s arms.

The next morning, Rey woke up before Ben, immediately regretting how much she drank the night before. She groaned as she rolled onto her back and rubbed her temples in a futile attempt at stopping the pounding in her head. “Can I get you some Tylenol?” she heard the husky voice of the man next to her ask. She rolled her head to the side to look at him, but she winced at the light that had begun streaming in on his side of the bed. 

“Medicine cabinet, top shelf,” she groaned as she covered her head with her blanket and sank lower into the bed. Ben returned a couple minutes later with water and some pills. “Here,” he said as he gently peeled the covers back and handed her the medicine. “Thank you,” she grumbled as she took the Tylenol and finished the water.

“I have work in an hour,” she groaned as she looked over at her phone and checked the time. “You can always call out,” he said, stroking her hair gently. “Can’t” she mumbled as she willed herself to get up and get ready for work. “I can drive you if you want,” he offered, while putting on his jeans and buckling his belt.

“That would be great, but then I’d be stranded there later,” she said, as she made her way to the bathroom and brushed her teeth. Ben was quiet for a few moments before speaking again.

“I could pick you back up... if you’re not sick of me yet,” he said nervously. Rey stopped what she was doing and smiled for the first time that morning. “I could never be sick of you,” she hesitantly admitted as she resumed  putting her hair up in a pony tail and reentering the room.

Ben looked at her intently and his eyes widened in surprise at her response. “Are you sick of me?” she asked, suddenly aware of the fact that she had invited him to meet her friends just days after she saw him at the Diner. 

“What, no,” he responded in what sounded like disbelief. “I always want to be around you,” he said honestly, causing Rey to try to hide her smile. 

“Do you really mean, that?” she asked, as she realized she needed to hear the answer to one of her biggest concerns as of late. She watched as Ben stopped buttoning his shirt to look up at her. He stared at her for an  excruciatingly long moment, clearly mulling something over in his head, before he spoke again.

“Rey, I love you. Of course, I mean that,” he said  matter of  factly . Rey stared at him in shock and he looked like he had never been more serious in his entire life. He loved her. He said it. He meant it. Every feeling that she had felt was being reciprocated by the person she was madly in love with.

A huge grin spread across Rey’s face as she crossed the room and kissed him. “I love you, Ben Solo,” she said into his mouth and she could feel him smile before he deepened their kiss. 

Rey had never felt as happy as she was, kissing the man she was in love with in her shitty apartment in the bad part of town. 

Eventually, Ben pulled away from Rey and reminded her that she had work. Rey groaned and  thre w her head back dramatically. “Well, the sooner we get there, the sooner I get to pick you up,” he said as he brushed his hand over her cheek. “Fine,” said Rey reluctantly, as she slipped on her shoes and grabbed her jacket. 

Ben dropped Rey off and she spent the rest of the day miserably hungover but thinking about what had transpired between her and her professor. Maz could obviously tell that Rey was uncomfortable and about midday she told her that she should take the next day off. “You work too hard Rey. Plus, I still smell the booze on you... and  a man . Take tomorrow and relax for once,” said the older woman as Rey blushed and thanked her. Once her shift ended and she left for the evening, Maz reminded her to stay home the next day. “Be good, Rey. And tell Solo to behave,” she added, causing Rey to go wide eyed. The woman smiled and walked away as Rey left, shaking her head. 

As she walked up to Ben’s car, he hopped out and opened  the  door for her. “That's my boy, Benny,” shouted Maz from the entrance of the Diner as she cackled and disappeared back into the restaurant. Rey shook her head again, and Ben seemed to understand Maz’s innate ability to gather a ridiculous amount of information about a situation with being told anything. “I swear her and my mother are in on this together,”  he mumbled  as he buckled his seatbelt and left the parking lot. 

“She knows too?” Rey asked as she let her head fall back against the headrest.  Ben  laughed. “She knows.”

As the drove, Rey mentioned that Maz had given her the next day off, and  Professor Ren  offered for them to stay at his place for the night instead. “We’re right here if you’d like to stay over,” he offered as they neared the turnoff for his street. 

Rey hesitated for a moment, considering what that could possibly mean for them. 

She knew Ben would never pressure her into having sex, but now that she was sure of her own feelings for him as well as aware of how he felt about her, she knew that she was ready. Although she wanted Professor Ren, she couldn’t help but still feel insecure about her naivety when it came to intimacy in a relationship. Ben was almost ten years older than her, and obviously more experienced and she felt a pang of anxiety when she thought about how underwhelming she might be in bed. She shook her head and reminded herself that Ben loved her for her and he seemed to be more than happy with their intimacy the other night.

With a renewed sense of confidence, she made up her mind. Ben Solo would be her first, and as the seconds passed by, she quickly came to realize that deep down she hoped he would be her only. 

“Yeah, that sounds great.  Lets go,” she said with assurance.

_____________________________________________________________________________________

Rey loved him, and now she was interested in spending the night at his house.  Kylo tried to keep his cool when Rey had taken him up on his offer, but he felt his voice threatening to crack so he simply nodded in response.

Rey was a virgin, this he knew. He would never pressure her into any situation that could possibly make her uncomfortable, regardless of how much he wanted her.  Kylo had been with several women when he was in college, but none of them had ever meant anything to him. They were all beautiful and wealthy and smart, but they were also all vapid elitists who only cared about him because of his family name and money. 

Rey was different.

Not only was Rey absolutely brilliant, she was also funny, and interesting, and sincere. She had cared about  Kylo enough to write him an eye-opening note before they had even considered a relationship together. She was unapologetically honest and unapologetically herself. He loved everything about Rey and the more time he spent with her, the more he realized that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with her. Thus, he would love to have sex with Rey, but he would let her take things at her pace so as not to ruin the precious bond that they shared together.

“Are you hungry?” asked Ren as they pulled into his garage and made their way into the house. “Ben, I’m always hungry. If you’re going to date me you should probably know this,” she laughed as he took her coat and hung it up. “Dinner it is,” he said, making his way to the fridge.

Rey sat at her favorite seat at the island and  Kylo smirked to her as he placed sandwich fixings in front of him. “Limited selection tonight,” he began as he gestured to the offering in front of him. “What’s your favorite type of sandwich?” he asked, watching Rey’s eyes instinctively widen at the sight of food. “As long as you’re making it, I'm not picky,” she said as she looked up and grinned widely.

Kylo made quick work of a couple of sandwiches and grabbed a bag of chips out of the pantry. “It’s not glamorous, but dinner is served,” he said to Rey who did an excited wiggle in her chair before quickly grabbing one of the meals in front of her and taking a big bite.

“ Thkang gyoew ,” she said through a mouthful of food.  Kylo laughed out loud as he watched her swallow before speaking again. “Thank you,” she clarified before taking another bite. “It’s my pleasure, Rey,” he said before eating his meal as well.

After they had finished,  Kylo cleaned up and Rey asked if she could use his shower. “You don’t have to ask about using anything in this house,” he said with his eyes still focused on the dishes in front of him. He heard Rey let out a small breath behind him, before he felt her kiss the side of his neck. Ren looked over to her then and she smiled widely up at him before stepping away and making her way out of the kitchen. 

Kylo turned the water off and tried to distract himself as he thought about Rey currently undressing and lathering herself up upstairs. ‘ _ Don’t be weird _ ,’ he chastised himself as he paced the kitchen for a moment before deciding to go upstairs and change into sweats. It was already 10:30pm, so he figured they would spend the rest of the evening watching a movie or just hanging out.

As he passed the door to the guest room,  Kylo hesitated and listened to the steady stream of the shower running in the bathroom. He was instantly transported back to the morning he had almost kissed her in bed, and he swallowed as he felt his erection beginning to harden. ‘ _ Keep it together, Ren _ ,’ he said to himself as he forced himself to move to his room and change.

After pulling on his sweats he suddenly realized that Rey would need a change of clothes as well. He grabbed the oversized shirt and hoodie she had worn last time and opened his door to bring her the clothing. As he turned into the hallway, however, he came face to face with Rey who was flushed from the shower and wearing nothing aside from a towel wrapped around her small form.

“Oh, hi,” she said in a startled voice as she jumped back from him. “Sorry,” he mumbled immediately and backed away from her to give her room. “I was just...” she began in a hurried voice, gesturing uncomfortably from the guestroom to his room. “I was just going to grab a change of clothes. I didn’t bring  anything with me,” she said shakily and looking incredibly unsure of herself. 

“I was actually just bringing you this,” he said reassuringly as he held the clothes out to her and smiled. He watched as Rey looked at the clothes, then back up to him. She still looked somewhat uneasy, but gratefully accepted the items. “I’ll just...” said  Kylo in a low voice. “Be downstairs if you need anything else,” he added, leaving room between them as he passed by her. “Thank you!” she called after him.

Ren bolted down the stairs and tried to calm his body down before Rey rejoined him. Seeing her flushed and wrapped only in a towel sent a spark of heat straight to his core. He didn’t want to make Rey feel any more uncomfortable than she already did after their awkward hallway interaction, so he plopped himself down on the couch and turned on the TV. 

After a few minutes of  Kylo pretending to not be completely consumed by thoughts of an almost naked Rey, he heard her descend the stairs before taking a seat beside him on the couch. He kept his attention on the screen in front of him, but offered her a blanket before scanning for a movie to watch. 

“Ooh, yes that,” said Rey, breaking the silence as he landed on Shaun of the Dead.  Kylo looked over at her and smiled in surprise. 

“Do you like horror movies?” he asked, genuinely curious. Rey shrugged and pulled the blanket closer to her chin. “This isn’t entirely scary,” she stated confidently as she turned her attention to the screen. “But some horror movies, yeah. Just not slasher flicks. I hate super  gory ones,” she added as she wrinkled her nose. 

They caught the movie about halfway through, but they had both seen it already and neither seemed to mind catching it from the middle. At one point, Rey draped her legs over  Kylo’s lap and he began to gently stroke her. Her legs were warm and velvety soft, and he had to fight to maintain control of his arousal. 

After the movie ended, Rey got up and stretched and  Kylo let out a relieved breath. He had managed not to get a raging hard-on with Rey draped over him, and he successfully held it together long enough to not scare her off. 

“I need to sleep,” Said Rey as she looked down at  Kylo with dark eyes and he moved to turn off the TV. 

Ren got up and stretched as well, letting out a yawn as he turned out the lights in the living room and followed Rey upstairs. The two hesitated in front of the guestroom door and Ren felt his heartbeat speed up. Rey moved to enter the room, but  Kylo interrupted her by gently touching her arm. “You could sleep in my room tonight... if you want,” he said, holding his breath.

Rey looked up at him nervously before smiling politely and shaking her head. “Um... you know, it’s actually okay. I think I just need... a good night sleep in here,” she said desperately and  Kylo felt his heart crumble a little at the rejection. At the same time, he completely understood how Rey might be feeling and he wanted her to feel safe and not pressured to do  anything she didn’t want to. 

Not wanting to push the subject any further,  Kylo smiled and said “Goodnight, Kenobi.” He watched curiously as Rey’s face seemed to fall, before he placed a chaste kiss on her lips and made his way down the hall to his bedroom.

Once inside, he shut the door and paced once again. He wanted Rey so, so badly. He wanted to charge back to her room and kiss her the way she deserved to be kissed. He wanted to make her feel good. He wanted her to understand the power she held over him. 

Ren took a deep breath before calming himself slightly and exhaling dejectedly.  _ ‘Go to sleep and give her the space she needs _ ,’ he thought sternly to himself. He nodded and ran his hand through his hair before turning to make his way back to his bed. 

Just then,  Kylo stopped in his tracks as he heard a small knock on his door. ‘ _ Rey _ ,’ he thought to himself and he felt his heart pound in his chest once again as he made his way quickly back to the door.

When he opened it, he was met with Rey’s dark blown out eyes that mirrored his own. She was breathing quickly and he could feel the nervous energy pouring off of her. The two stared at each other for a long moment before Rey crossed the distance between them and crashed her mouth up and into his. 

Kylo immediately reciprocated and licked across her bottom lip, deepening the kiss between them. They both moved desperately, and  Kylo groaned into Rey’s mouth when she took his bottom lip between her teeth and nibbled gently. Ren made a fist in Rey’s hair and crashed his mouth back to hers, as if consuming her very soul. 

He felt Rey’s fingers rake down his chest, then begin to lift up the bottom edge of his shirt. He begrudgingly removed his mouth from hers to lift his shirt over his head. Before resuming their kiss,  Kylo watched as Rey’s eyes moved down over his chest and toned abs and she bit her lip. He couldn’t help but feel confident under her admiring gaze and he stepped forward to brush a hair behind her ear.

“What do you want, Rey?” he asked quietly as he brought his mouth to her ear and nibbled on her lobe. He felt Rey’s hands hesitantly explore his chest and midsection as he began kissing down her neck. Rey moaned when he marked her neck in the same  place he had the other night and he  inadvertently bucked his hips into hers. 

Rey still hadn’t answered his question, but Ren didn’t want to make her feel pressured to say anything, so he contented himself in kissing her neck and mouth. After another minute, Rey placed her hand on his chest and gently pushed him away from her. He immediately panicked and feared that he had pushed her too far, but the look in Rey’s eyes said something  entirely different.

Ren watched in awe as Rey’s hands glided slowly down her body and landed at the hem of the oversized shirt she was wearing. He couldn’t help his mouth from falling open as she brought the shirt up and over her head, exposing her breasts to him. Kylo shook his head in disbelief, taking in the sight of Rey standing before him in only her modest white panties. He let out a groan as he watched Rey blush under his stare, and she took a step closer to him and grabbed his hands.

He genuinely thought he was going to cum in his pants, when Rey placed his hands on her breasts and looked him in the eyes. “Rey,”  Kylo said warningly, knowing that if they continued the way they were going they would need to slow down before they potentially took it too far and did something that she was uncomfortable with. 

Rey ignored Ren, and stepped even closer to him, this time bringing her hand up to trace the waistline of his sweatpants. “I want this,” she said biting her lip before continuing. “I want you,” she added, and  Kylo wasted no time in crashing his lips to hers once more as his hands massaged her breasts.

“Fuck, Rey,” he mumbled into her mouth and he could feel her smile against his lips. “You have no idea what you do to me,” he added and sucked in a breath as Rey’s hand grazed his erection. “I think I have an idea,” she said cheekily and  Kylo pulled his mouth away from her stared into her eyes.

“I want you, Kenobi. I want to take you here and now...” he said firmly and he brought his hands up to cup her face. “But I need to know that’s what you want to. We can stop right now and just go to sleep. Just tell me what you want,” he said in a tone of desperation.

Rey stared at him again before speaking up. “I want you take me. Here...” she said quietly, swallowing before she added, “...and now.”

Kylo nodded, still in disbelief that any of this was happening, before crashing his lips to hers again and kissing her  passionately . “I love you, Rey,” he said between breaths and kisses. “I know,” she responded breathily.

With that,  Kylo kissed a trail down her neck and to her breast, where he sucked one of her nipples into his mouth. He nibbled on her gently as he pinched her other  nipple and tugged on it. Rey moaned and keened into him as he worked her, and he could feel pre-cum gathering at the tip of his length. 

After a moment of giving attention to her breasts,  Kylo rose again to kiss Rey’s mouth,  letting his hand trail down to her waistline. He hesitated for a moment before slipping his hand underneath the fabric and tracing a thick finger along her slick heat. 

“You’re so wet already,” he said into her mouth as his finger found Rey’s entrance and he circled it. “Sorry,” Rey said in an embarrassed voice and  Kylo kissed her fiercely. “I told you never to apologize to me, Kenobi. I love that you’re this wet for me. You’re perfect,” he said, bringing his finger up to massage circles around her clit. 

Rey moaned as he teased her most sensitive spot, then she tensed as  Kylo slid his finger inside of her. He moved his face away from Rey’s so he could watch her as he pumped his finger into her, and he almost growled when he saw her eyes closed and her mouth open in a small ‘O’ shape. “You look unbelievably sexy right now, Rey,” he said as his finger moved back to working her clit and she furrowed her brows and moaned again. 

Rey opened her eyes after a moment of him pleasuring her and she moved her hand to his erection, making him gasp at her touch. He continued fingering her as he watched her bring the waistband of his sweatpants down and his hard length sprung forward. Rey took him in her hand and squeezed gently before hesitating momentarily to moan as he pumped inside of her again. 

After regaining her composure,  Kylo groaned as Rey made a fist around his member and she stroked him up and down, the way he had instructed her to the other night. As Rey worked him, he felt himself quickly spiraling out of control, and he removed his hand from her pants and halted her movement. 

Rey looked up at him confused before he quickly picked her up and laid her down on her bed. He crawled on top of her and knelt between her knees,  admiring Rey as she lay before him panting and flushed.

Ren shook his head again in disbelief then dropped his head back and closed his eyes as Rey gripped his length again. “Rey,” he warned as he gently moved her hand away from him before  turning his attention back to her breasts.

Ren gently brushed over Rey’s hardened nipples before pinching both and causing Rey to let out a sharp breath and buck her hips into his. He brought his mouth down to place a soothing lick over both of the firm buds before kissing a path down to her panties. 

Once there, Ren placed a sloppy kiss over the wet fabric of Rey’s underwear before hooking his fingers into the garment and pulling it to the side, exposing her wet core to him. Rey gasped as  Kylo licked up her seam and began  laving her clit once more. 

Ren pleasured Rey with his tongue then brought his other hand to her entrance and slipped a finger inside of her. Rey canted her hips, and  Kylo took the opportunity to carefully slip another finger inside of her. He waited a moment for her to adjust before he pushed his fingers in and out of her and worked her with his mouth. 

Soon after adding his second finger, Rey began to pant desperately. “Ben,” she moaned as he began to feel her pulse around his fingers. He kept licking her clit and pushing into her until he felt Rey’s body tense beneath him and begin to tremble uncontrollably. Rey let out another load moan as she rode out her orgasm, before Ren removed his fingers and gave her a moment to relax.

Ben licked his lips as he watched Rey come down from the high of her orgasm and he felt his cock twitch in anticipation when she opened her eyes and looked up at him. “Do you want to stop?” he asked breathily as he took himself in his hand and stroked once to appease his desire to be touched. She swallowed as she watched his hand on his erection and blushed. 

“I want you,” she said confidently, and  Kylo let out a small breath as he watched her spread her legs and make room for him.  Kylo brushed his hand along the inside of her leg and used his thumb to gently rub over Rey’s clit once more. She bucked beneath him and he continued to stroke himself and rub her clit before  moving to reach into the drawer of his nightstand. 

“I’m on the pill,” Rey said, interrupting his movement and stalling him above her. “And I’m... a virgin. So, I’m clean,” she added quietly.  Kylo looked down at her, realizing what she was proposing and her felt his cock bob in anticipation once more. “I’ve been with a few others several years ago... But I'm clean,” he stated honestly before adding, “This is entirely up to you.”

Rey thought to herself for a moment before putting her hand on his and leading him back down toward her. “I. ..want to feel you,” she said in a quiet, but determined voice, and  Kylo nearly lost his mind. 

He kissed Rey passionately before bringing her hand down to her core and telling her to rub  herself. “It will feel better at first if you do that,” he said as he brought his body down to hers and felt his erection brush up against her entrance.

“Are you sure you still want to do this, Rey? We can stop,” he said looking up to her before going any further. Rey opened her eyes as she worked her clit and bit her lip. “I want you,” she panted and  Kylo took himself in his hand and nudged her slit, getting himself slick with her juices.

“This might hurt at first,” he said before moving. “Just tell me if you need to stop,” he added reassuringly before beginning to slowly sink his length into her.

He had to calm himself as he immediately saw stars and found it difficult to breath, feeling Rey squeeze around him. She was unbelievably tight and knowing that he was the first person to ever take Rey was overwhelming. “Fuck,” he gasped as he filled her to the hilt.

Rey had frozen beneath him and he gave her time to adjust to his size before moving. He watched as she furrowed her eyebrows when he withdrew from her and he hesitated when he saw her wince as he slowly sank back down into her. 

“Rey,” he managed to say shakily as it took everything inside of him to still within her. “Are you okay?” he asked, wanting her to enjoy this moment as much as he was. 

Rey opened her eyes and took a deep breath before beginning to rub circles round her clit again and nodding her head for him to continue.

Kylo pulled out of Rey again before thrusting back into her more quickly. He heard Rey begin to pant as he moved and he was elated when Rey started to meet his thrusts with her hips. “Oh my god, Ben,” she panted as he moved inside of her. He looked down at Rey as he continued thrusting and the sight of her blushing underneath him and playing with herself nearly drove him over the edge. 

He reached his hand down to grab one of her nipples and he tugged firmly on it. Rey let out a little mewl before picking up the pace on her clit and moaning loudly. “You feel so good around me, Rey,” gasped Ren as he rode the girl beneath him.

Rey bit her lip and used her free hand to firmly grip his thigh. “I’m really close, Ben,” She panted as her eyes met his and he moved her hand out of the way to brush her clit with his thumb. Rey continued to meet his thrusts with her hips and he could feel her beginning to fall apart beneath him. “I’m going to cum,” she gasped as he felt her heat clench tightly around his cock. 

Kylo watched as Rey’s body began to shake beneath his and he felt himself topple over the edge as well, groaning loudly as he spilled into her.  Kylo was buried deep inside Rey and overcome with ecstasy as he slowly came down from his high and his breathing began to even out. 

When he found the ability to move once again, he looked down at Rey who was looking back at him and panting. “Rey,” he began, but Rey smiled and brought her hand up to touch his lips. “I love you,” she said and  Kylo let out a relieved breath and nuzzled his face into her neck. “I know,” he said, echoing her words from earlier and breathing in her scent.

After laying entwined together for several minutes,  Kylo eventually withdrew from Rey, who went to use the restroom and clean up. Ren stayed in bed and laid on his back in awe of the situation that had just unfolded. He was startled out of his thoughts by Rey’s shy voice as she climbed back into the bed and sat on her knees beside him. “Was that okay for you?” she asked nervously.

Kylo turned to face her and he placed a hand on her leg and rubbed her soothingly. “Rey...” he started but  then paused in order to prop himself up on his elbow to get a better look at the girl beside him. “That was the best night of my entire life,” he answered sincerely, causing Rey to blush and look away from him.

He watched as she hesitated before speaking again. “I know you’ve been with other girls, and this was my first time and I...” She began, but  Kylo interrupted her. “You’re the only woman I've ever been in love with, Kenobi. This was something entirely different and genuinely amazing,” he said as he stared at her intently, wanting her to understand exactly how he felt. “I only even want to do this with you... for as long as you’ll let me,” he added. 

Rey smiled, then moved to lay down beside him.  Kylo wrapped her in his arms and kissed her shoulder. He loved Rey deeply and he never wanted to let her go. 

Both  Kylo and Rey fell fast asleep, wrapped in each other's arms.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! This was another nerve-wracking chapter to write, but I'm happy with how it turned out. My next update will be in a few days. I think there will only be a couple more chapters to wrap up this fic. Thanks again for sticking around.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben must make some difficult decisions about his future

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HI!!!! I'm back, babes. Sorry for basically leaving ya'll on read. I got a bit sidetracked having a baby during the height of the pandemic in NY. I don't really have much more to say except, "fuq." Long story short, we're all good and I have a happy, healthy second little tot to round out the fam. 
> 
> I think there will only be a few more chapters of this fic, so buckle up, bitches. We in this. 
> 
> Happy to be back.
> 
> Enjoy!!!!

Rey woke up to Ben’s arms wrapped around her. She smiled to herself remembering what had happened the night prior, and she felt butterflies in her stomach as she thought about the way he had looked at her and told her he loved her. 

As she lay quietly, she couldn’t help but suddenly feel her smile fade as she began to think about what would happen next. Rey’s typical coping mechanism had always been to never become attached to anyone or anything for long, as they or it would most likely leave. Rey thought of how much she had cried over her parents in the orphanage after she had been abandoned, and how sad she had been when her foster families gave her up each and every time she was placed. She thought about how happy she was when she found out that she had a living family member in Paris, only to find out that he wanted nothing to do with her. 

Rey felt her anxiety rising as she thought about how much she loved the man she was currently lying in bed with. She wanted desperately to stay with him, but she thought about the letter she had

received the day prior in the mail. 

Rey had been accepted into Columbia’s Masters of Science in Engineering program in New York, and knew that it would be in her best interest to attend the prestigious university. That, however, would mean that her and Ben would be separated for at least two years, as he had left New York to avoid unwanted attention after his father’s death. She could never expect him to want to go with her, as she knew he would have difficulty finding work there due to his notorious reputation. 

Bubbles of insecurity then began threatening to choke Rey. Would Ben even care if she left? Would he wait for her to come back? What if she was offered a job in New York? Would he leave the security of Corellia and risk tarnishing his reputation to continue to date one of his former students? 

Rey found it hard to swallow as her mind spun wildly and her heartbeat raced. Then, as if sensing her internal turmoil, Rey felt Ben’s arms give her midsection a gentle squeeze, bringing her closer into his chest. “You’re shaking,” he whispered into the back of her neck and Rey took a deep breath in an attempt to calm herself. 

She slowly turned in his arms and nuzzled her face into his wide, hard chest. “Sorry,” she mumbled quietly as she reached her arms around his neck and pressed a gentle kiss to his lips. 

Professor Ren kissed her back but then broke away and his deep brown eyes met hers. “Is this about last night?” he asked seriously, his eyes scanning hers for the truth. Rey blushed at the thought of what had happened between them, but she smiled coyly and shook her head. “No, no,” she reassured him. “Last night was perfect,” she added, brushing his hair behind his ear. 

“Would you like to talk about what’s wrong?” he questioned, as he leaned his head into her touch. Rey looked at him silently for a moment, thinking to herself. She couldn’t just drop all of her insecurities on him. It wouldn’t be fair to tarnish what they had shared the night prior with life-changing information about her acceptance into Columbia. She would have to tell him eventually though, and the longer she waited the more damage this news might do. 

Rey bit her lip as she prepared herself to talk to Ben about their future. She knew this conversation would most likely scare him away or make him uninterested in her, and she genuinely didn’t know if she could bear losing the man she loved. After spending her entire life convincing herself she needed no one, she had finally found a person she didn’t want to live without. Now she had to tell him that _she_ was going to be the one leaving, and the thought of hurting him broke her heart. 

“It’s just...” she began but then stopped as she felt a single tear stream down her cheek. She smiled a sad smile as Ben wiped it away with his thumb, his eyebrows furrowed in concern. “I’ve been accepted into a Master’s program,” she said bluntly. She watched as the corners of Ben’s mouth turned up slightly and his proud eyes beamed. “Of course you were, Kenobi,” he quipped. “You’re one of the most intelligent, hardworking, and motivated people I've ever met.” 

Rey couldn’t help but smile at his compliment, but her joy quickly faded as she added more context to the information she had just shared. “...I’ve been accepted into Columbia, Ben,” she stated matter of factly and she watched as his smile fell. 

Rey looked away from Professor Ren, as she couldn’t handle the rejection that would surely drop from his lips. But Ben stayed silent. 

She could feel his eyes burning into her, and she suddenly felt uneasy under his gaze. He was deep in thought and she could almost feel the hurt rolling off of him. 

“Look at me,” he stated coldly, the sound of his deep voice startling her. Rey’s eyes immediately shot to his and she studied his expression for a moment, but found it completely unreadable. He was going to end this. He was going to end the one thing that made Rey feel whole for once in her life. She was leaving and he was going to move on without her. 

Tears streamed down Rey’s cheeks before she could stop them, and Ben continued to stare at her intensely. “What do you want, Rey?” he asked in a cold deep tone. 

Rey knew exactly what she wanted. For once she wanted to be selfish. She wanted to attend Columbia and excel in her career, but she wanted Ben to come with her. She wanted them to be together and for them both to be happy. These were unrealistic expectations, however. She knew Ben would never leave his job and drop everything just to follow her to a place that caused him so much pain. It was unfair of her to even ask him to consider that option, so all she could respond with was, “I don’t know.” 

The moment it left her lips she could see the hurt register on Professor Ren’s face. Had he been expecting her to say something else? 

“Okay,” he said flatly as he began to get out of bed and get dressed. Rey watched his lean, muscular form move gracefully through his bedroom as she took in what he had just said. ‘Okay?’ she thought to herself as she quickly hopped out of bed and got dressed as well. “How is any of this okay?” she said quietly as the frustration began building inside of her. 

Rey had just dumped a relationship bomb on Ben and all he could say to her was “okay.” This was not okay. She was going to move to New York for two years and they were never going to see each other. How was any of this okay? 

“I don’t know,” he shot back at her and Rey stopped in her tracks as she could feel the venom in his response. “Ben,” she said in surprise and when her eyes met his, she recognized the frigid, unwelcoming look he used to carry around before they had begun their relationship. As she watched him silently, he turned away from her and walked downstairs. 

Rey was overwhelmed with grief and couldn’t help but cry at the feeling of loss with regard to the relationship she had worked so hard to build. Ben was clearly hurt and she knew this wasn’t how she wanted things to end. He had asked her what she wanted and she hadn’t told him. She wiped her tears and quickly followed him. Selfish or not, she was going to tell him what she wanted. Even if this ruined things, he deserved her honesty. 

When she finally found him, Professor Ren was standing in his kitchen and leaning on the island, his head hanging low in defeat. “Ben,” she said quietly, but he refused to acknowledge her. She took a few steps closer. “Ben,” she pleaded as she brought her hand up to the middle of his back and gently rubbed. 

She could feel Ben tense up under her touch, and she whipped her hand away when she heard an almost inaudible, “stop.” 

Tears spilled down Rey’s cheeks again and she pleaded once more with him to turn around. Her voice broke as she felt her throat tense up from the rising anxiety in her stomach, and she turned to leave and get her stuff from upstairs. Just as she was motioning to move, however, Ben turned and his red, glassy eyes met hers. “What?” he spat back at her and Rey’s momentary relief was shattered by his tone. 

“I wasn’t honest with you,” said Rey shakily as she crossed her arms and suddenly felt very small and very exposed standing in Ben’s cavernous kitchen. The intimidating man before her stood completely still, glaring at her. 

Rey took a deep breath as she attempted to regain her composure before she continued. “You asked me what I wanted but I said I didn’t know, and that’s not true,” she said. “I know exactly what I want,” she added and she took a half step closer to Professor Ren. 

“For the first time in my life I have everything that I could have ever dreamed of. I’ve been accepted at an Ivy League institution, I have incredible friends, and I have someone who I’m fairly certain completes me,” she stated as her voice became more confident. “What I want is to get my Master’s in New York, and for you to come with me. I want to be with you and I want you to actually want to be with me. I know that is an impossible thing to ask, which is why I said I didn’t know what I wanted before. It’s because what I want isn’t something that’s attainable. What I want isn’t something that’s fair and I don’t know what to say or do about it,” she said as she uncrossed her arms and steeled herself before adding, “all I know is I want you.” 

Ben’s eyes bore into hers and she once again felt very exposed standing before him. 

The two stood staring intensely at each other for several agonizing moments, before Ben closed the distance between them and kissed Rey fiercely. 

Rey was taken by surprise and it took her a beat to catch up to him and return the kiss. She put all of the emotions that had been whirling around in her head into it. She wanted him to feel the sincerity of her words through her kiss, and she needed him to know how serious her feelings were for him. 

“I love you, Ben,” breathed Rey in between meeting her lips to his. Ben kissed her again, this time even more aggressively than before. Rey moaned into him as his tongue licked across her lips and gained entrance into her mouth. 

The two continued to kiss feverishly in the middle of Professor Ren’s kitchen, until he placed his hands on her backside and she brought her legs up and around his hips. He turned them around and sat her down upon the kitchen island, and he spread her legs and made room for himself to stand between them. 

Ben stared at Rey for a long moment, taking in her disheveled hair and pink cheeks. He then smiled and brought his hand up to her face and gently stroked her cheek. “I know, Kenobi,” he said before kissing her slowly and delicately fisting his hand in her hair. 

Rey moaned again as Ben bucked his hips into hers and she tilted her head back as he began to place a trail of sloppy kissed down the column of her neck. 

Her professor wasted no time and brought the oversized t-shirt she was wearing up and over her head, leaving her fully nude and exposed to him. 

Ben kissed her mouth once more, this time moving his hand to her heat and beginning to stroke the place she wanted to be touched the most. 

“You want me?” she heard him ask in a deep voice, bringing her out of her momentary haze of pleasure and back to reality. 

Rey did want Ben. In every way a person could want someone else. She loved him and she had no intention of stopping. As she was about to respond, however, Professor Ren slipped a finger into Rey’s wet folds causing her to gasp. 

“Do you want me Rey?” he asked again as he pumped his finger into her. Rey felt her eyes roll back as he worked her. His thick finger hit a spot inside of her that she didn’t know existed and she moaned loudly. “Yes.” 

As if emboldened by her response, Ben added another finger and continued working her. Rey struggled to maintain control over her body as she felt pleasure building up inside of her. “Ben,” she panted as he kissed her neck, driving her nearly over the edge. 

“Not yet, Kenobi,” he replied, as he stopped what he was doing. Rey’s eyebrows knit together in confusion and sexual frustration. Before she could will herself to open her eyes, however, she felt Ben lift her up and stand her facing the island. The cold marble of the counter made her shiver, and she let out an indignant gasp as Ben pushed her upper body against the surface. 

Before Rey could think about the coolness of the surface caressing her chest, Ben pressed his clothed pelvis against her backside and used his foot to separate her legs. She felt Ben step away from her, and the thought of him having a full view of her naked body spread out in front of him sent a shot of heat directly to her core. 

“Touch yourself,” she heard him say from behind her, and Rey did as she was told and brought one of her hands to her clit. As she rubbed small circles around her apex, she could hear her professor’s breath quicken and the sound of skin on skin behind her. Rey realized that Ben was pleasuring himself to her and the thought of him getting off to her brought her once again close to climax. 

“Finger yourself,” he commanded, again using a deep authoritative voice, and Rey immediately complied. She moaned as she slid two fingers into her heat and she began slowly pumping them into herself. From behind her, she heard Ben let out a huff as well as a mumbled curse, before he approached her and grabbed her wrist, stopping her from pleasuring herself further. 

Rey whimpered at the loss of touch and she felt herself inadvertently buck back into the man behind her, desperately seeking relief. 

“Tell me what you want, Rey,” he whispered into her ear as he trailed his massive hands down the length of her back and landed on her backside. She felt him squeeze her cheeks firmly before stopping and waiting for a response. 

“I want you,” she pleaded, bucking into him again looking for the friction she desired. 

Ben let out a quiet chuckle before placing his hand to her heat and rubbing delicate circles around her clit. Rey moaned loudly, causing Ben to pick up the speed of his motion. “Oh my god, Ben,” she gasped breathily as the man behind her brought her closer and closer to orgasm. 

“What do you want, Rey?” he asked again, this time rubbing the head of his member along her slick folds as he continued is ministrations. 

Rey wanted nothing more than for Ben to take her in that moment. She loved him and she loved the way he made her feel. She loved feeling a mix of vulnerable and powerful when she was with him, and she loved the way he seemed to always know exactly what she wanted, even before he asked her. 

“Fuck me...” she responded desperately. “Please.” 

Her professor wasted no time and did exactly as Rey had asked. He firmly grabbed her hips then gently drove himself deep within her slick folds. Rey gasped at the sudden intrusion, and she was grateful for the moment that Ben gave her to adjust to his size before moving. 

After a moment, Ben began thrusting into Rey slowly but firmly, eliciting little mewls from her every time he entered her. 

Rey felt surges of pleasure every time he filled her up. The combination of the cold marble countertop on her chest and the hard heat from behind her proved to be an erotic combination and she could feel herself beginning to near her climax. 

As if sensing this, Ben wrapped his arm around her thigh and began circling Rey’s clit as he drove into her. Rey groaned in extasy and let her forehead press down against the countertop as she reveled in the feeling of Ben’s hand and shaft pleasuring her simultaneously. 

“I’m so close,” she mumbled into the surface of the island as she felt her body beginning to tense as her orgasm neared. 

“Come for me, Rey,” groaned Ben breathily, as he continued fucking her into the kitchen island. 

With that, Rey felt herself slip over the edge of her climax. She felt her muscles tense then shake as she rode out her high and she could feel Ben’s jerky movements as his own orgasm followed. 

Ben slumped against her back and she let out a satisfied chuckle as her body buzzed with electricity. She felt Ben kiss her back before he slowly pulled out of her and leaned against the counter. Rey took a moment to right herself up before turning to look at Ben. 

She couldn’t help but blush as he handed her some napkins to clean up, but she gratefully accepted the offering. 

“I want you too, Rey. I think that is pretty obvious,” rumbled Ben’s low voice as he watched her clean herself up. Rey looked up at him and she was taken aback by how serious his eyes were as they burned into hers. 

Rey remembered back to their fight and realized that this was Ben’s way of saying that he didn’t care if she was leaving for New York. He still wanted her and he wasn’t just going to forget about her. 

Rey nodded to Ben in understanding before turning to make her way up to his shower. “We will figure this out Kenobi,” he called after her, and Rey couldn’t fight the smile that erupted on her face. She had finally found someone who wanted her and refused to lose her. After being abandoned by her family and let down all throughout her life, she had finally found someone who she knew deep down, would always be there for her. As much as she thought it cringey to admit, she knew in that moment that she had met the man she was going to one day marry. 

____________________________________________________________________________________ 

Kylo and Rey spent the rest of the afternoon together before he reluctantly dropped her off at her apartment. 

After everything that had transpired over the last twenty-four hours, it was nearly impossible for Ren to drive away. He loved Rey intensely and he now realized how difficult his life would be without her by his side when she moved to New York. 

When he arrived back home, he poured himself a glass of bourbon and contemplated his options moving forward. 

‘ _Rey is going to move to New York. You're just going to have to stay in this shithole and mope around until she comes home_ ,’ he thought to himself as he sipped his drink. ‘ _But what if she gets a job_ _and doesn’t want to come home? Then what?’_

Ben tightened his grip on his glass as he felt a flood of anxiety rising up in his throat. Rey finding a job in New York was more of a guarantee than a possibility. All of the best engineering firms on the east coast were located in the city, and he would be a fool to expect her to come back to the middle of nowhere Massachusetts just to be with him. 

He realized then that he would need to regain control of his life and fight for what he wanted, regardless of his past mistakes. He would forge a path forward and reclaim the name Ben Solo. 

He would go back to New York and make his father proud. 

Ben downed the rest of his drink before texting his mother to see if she would be free to meet with him regarding some “developments.” He knew what he needed to do in order to be there for Rey, and for once in his life he found the strength to do it. 

_Leia: Ben! Good to finally hear from you. I’m out of town for a conference until Tuesday evening. Would_ _Wednesday_ _work?_

_Ben: Wednesday is fine. Are you free at 8am?_

_Leia: I’ll clear my schedule. Is everything alright?_

_Ben: Fine. Good, actually. See you Wednesday._

_Leia: Love you Ben._

Ben looked at his phone for a long moment before typing back to his mother. 

_Ben: Love you too, mom._

Everything in his life seemed to finally be coming together. Because of Rey, he was happy in a way that he had never imagined possible, especially since his father’s death. Rey had reminded him that deep down he was worthy of being loved and respected and that he needed to stop punishing himself for his past. She also helped him to realize that he needed to let other people into his heart and that not everyone was going to use him the way that Snoke had. 

Ben took a deep breath as he felt a smile growing on his face. He felt so much light in his life after so many years of only seeing darkness. Rey had brought out the best in him and he truly loved her so much. He felt a stray tear streak down his cheek as he basked in his overwhelming happiness. For once, everything was right and he didn’t hurt anymore. 

Ben didn’t see Rey again until class on Tuesday. He had to fight back the urge to openly gawk at the phenomenal girl who had helped him become the man he had always wanted to be, and it was even more difficult not to immediately kiss her the moment she walked over to his desk after class. 

“Hi professor,” Rey said as she beamed up at him. There were several students trickling out of the room following his lecture, and it took everything within him to stay composed. “How can I help you, Ms. Kenobi?” he asked with a hint of a smirk, causing Rey to blush and look over to the last student making their way out of the classroom. Ben followed Rey’s gaze and his eyes landed one Bazine Netal as she took her time exiting the classroom. ‘ _Fucking_ _Bazine_ _,’_ he thought to himself frustratedly. 

Bazine made a point to wait for a moment at the door, looking over at Rey to assess whether or not she was going to leave. She was obviously waiting to be alone with him and he shook his head as he packed up the papers on his desk and adopted a sterner tone with Rey in order to dissuade Netal from hanging around any longer.

“Do you have a question Ms. Kenobi, or are you purposefully trying to make me late for my conference?” he barked at Rey, causing her to take a step away from his desk in surprise. He looked over to the door again and saw Bazine’s eyes go wide before she took the hint and bolted away, not wanting to annoy him further. When he looked back at Rey, he couldn’t help but chuckle at the half-hearted scowl she was giving him. 

“Sorry for making you late for your very important conference, Professor Ren. I guess I’ll just see myself out,” said Rey as she dramatically turned on her heels and began to make her way toward the exit. 

“I don’t think so, Kenobi,” said Ben playfully as he lunged toward her and spun her around so she was facing him. Rey smirked up at him as he tucked a piece of hair behind her ear, and suddenly found himself unable to resist her. 

Ben surged toward Rey and brought his lips firmly against hers. Almost instinctively, she opened her mouth to him and he deepened their kiss. Rey let out a tiny mewl before jumping back from Ben and staring at him wide-eyed. She playfully nudged his arm as she shook her head. “We’re at school, Ben. We can’t,” she said as she struggled to steady her breath. 

“I’m never going to apologize for kissing you, Rey,” he said as he put his hands in his pockets and smirked devilishly. 

Rey rolled her eyes before turning to leave the room. “I’m working until close tonight. I’ll text you when I’m home,” she said, hesitating at the door. “Just stay over my place,” replied Ben as he grabbed his belongings and followed Rey out the door. “It’s closer and then I won’t have to worry,” he added as he closed the classroom door and the two made their way out of the building and to the parking lot. 

Rey smiled up at him and he couldn’t help but notice the hint of a blush on her cheeks. He bit the inside of his mouth to stop himself from kissing her again and instead reached into his pocket and held out a key to Rey. “So you can come and go as you please,” he said as Rey took the key and looked at it with furrowed brows. 

“Is this?” she began as she looked up at him, but Ben cut her off. “I made a copy of my house key for you. My place doesn’t really feel like home when you’re not there,” he added as he brushed a hand nervously through his hair. 

Rey looked back down at the key then up again. “I don’t know what to say, Ben. Aside from thank you, of course. It’s just, wow. Thank you,” she said quietly as her eyes beamed. Ben laughed then put his hands in his pockets and looked away from her toward the parking lot. “Just say you’ll stay over tonight,” he said as he looked back at the beautiful girl in front of him. 

Rey smiled brightly and nodded. “I’ll be there by 10,” she responded cheerfully and he watched her stuff the key in her pocket. “Good,” he said as the two stood staring at each other longingly. He watched as Rey bit her lip, and with that, he turned away from her. “Not fair, Kenobi,” he said over his shoulder as he walked to his car. He heard Rey laugh as they parted ways and he couldn’t help but think about how happy he was that Rey would be in his arms again, his entire drive home. 

When Rey finally made it back to his place several hours later, the two showered together, then fell asleep wrapped in each other's arms after making love. 

The next morning, Ben left early to meet with his mother, and he insisted that Rey sleep in until her classes that afternoon. As much as he hated leaving her, he knew that this meeting with Leia was necessary in figuring out his next move in all of this. 

“Ben,” said his mother enthusiastically, as he walked in at exactly eight. “Please take a seat,” she added as she shut the door behind him and made his way to her desk. Ben chewed the inside of his cheek anxiously as he waited for his mom to make herself comfortable. 

“So, what brings you to my office?” she asked inquisitively, although it was clear that she knew something more than what she was saying. 

“There have been some... developments,” he began but then hesitated, hating how the statement undermined the life-altering events that had occurred over the past week. 

“Does this happen to have anything to do with a certain brilliant engineering student?” she asked knowingly, seeming to enjoy the way that Ben squirmed uncomfortably in front of her. 

Ben shook his head in annoyance, then took a deep breath and looked back at his mother. “I’m in love with Rey, mom,” he admitted honestly and he watched as Leia fought a smile from appearing on her otherwise stoic face. 

“I tried to fight my feelings for her,” he added as he nervously tensed his hands around the end of the armrests. “She’s just... everything,” he concluded as he brought his hand up to rest under his chin. His mother sat in front of him silently and her face showed no indication of how she felt about any of the information he had just dumped on her. 

“She’s leaving. She got into Columbia and I...” he continued, but stopped himself, thinking over everything he had decided upon the other night before feeling assured in his decision and resuming with confidence. “And I'm going with her. Back to New York. I don’t want to hide anymore. I want to be with the woman I love and not be afraid of being Ben Solo again. The press is probably bored with me

by now and I'll just have to find a job doing something... anything. I don’t care, as long as I’m with her... She’s home,” he concluded as he looked to his mother and waited impatiently for her response. 

Leia said nothing, but she let out a short breath before opening a drawer in her desk and fishing out a small box. She placed it in front of her and pushed it toward Ben. “Here,” she said as he looked at her questioningly and gently picked up the box before him. As he opened it and realized what it was, his eyes shot back up to his mother’s in surprise. “It was my mother’s. I knew you were in love with Rey from the moment I first saw you together. I’ve been carrying it around until you found the guts to admit how you felt about her,” she said as Ben plucked a delicate ring from the box and examined its elegant design. 

The ring was a simple gold band with an impressive emerald cut diamond in the middle. It was stunning in its simplicity and he instantly knew that one day Rey would love it. “Thank you, mom,” he said with a genuine smile on his face. 

His mother smiled back at him before bringing her hands together in front of her and sitting up straight in her chair. 

“Good. Now that that’s settled,” she said as she watched Ben place the ring back in the box and store it in his jacket pocket. “You’re fired,” she said firmly causing him to look up at his mother in surprise. 

“Well, more specifically, you resigned. Yesterday. Let’s say, some time before Ms. Bazinie Netal saw you kiss Rey in your classroom and follow her to the parking lot,” she added with mild annoyance as her eyes burned into Ben, who pinched the bridge of his nose in frustration. “Fucking Netal,” he mumbled under his breath before looking back to his mother. 

“That was an incredibly idiotic thing for you to do. I understand you love Rey, but you very well could have jeopardized her scholarship here at Corellia as well as her admittance into Columbia,” she scolded him as she shook her head and Ben was immediately transported back to every time she yelled at him as a child. He couldn’t help but feel a rush of embarrassment as well as guilt over how he had acted. Kissing Rey at school really was idiotic, and he wished he was a better man in that moment. 

“Ms. Netal had informed Professor Hux of what she saw and the two of them came to me to report the two of you,” she said as Ben immediately began to fill with rage at the idea of Hux knowing anything about his and Rey’s relationship. “You have to be kidding me,” he began to say but his mother raised her hand and silenced him. 

“I informed Professor Hux that you had come to me earlier in the day and had resigned from your position, citing personal reasons, and that technically what Ms. Netal had seen was a consensual interaction between two adults and nothing of her concern,” she said confidently as she watched Ben drop his head back against his chair before continuing. “And when Hux brought up the fact that you had potentially been grading her with a bias, I reminded him of the TA you used to grade all of your assignments this semester. So technically, they had no case against you and, therefore, no administrative action could be taken against you or Rey,” she concluded smugly. “You should’ve seen the look on Hux’s face,” she added, causing Ben to let out a chuckle as he shook his head in disbelief at the situation. 

“Who is going to teach the remainder of my classes?” he asked, suddenly registering the fact that he was no longer employed at Corellia. “You’re uncle. He was a bit reluctant to step in, but when I explained the situation... he was happy for you, Ben. And so am I,” she said sincerely. “But we both think you could have handled this entire situation a bit more... tactfully, if you will.” Ben laughed again, this time pursing his lips and nodding in agreement. 

“I think this is the part where you thank me, your loving mother, for saving your ass. Again,” she said as she began to get up from her chair and walk over to her son. 

Ben nodded again, and rose to meet his mother. She smiled up at him and he realized how incredibly lucky he truly was to have her in his life. He had spent so many years resenting her, but now he realized that she was a human too. She was allowed to make mistakes just like he was, and she was allowed to be forgiven. Ben took a step forward and brought his arms around his mom and pulled her into a hug. He felt her hand rub his back reassuringly and he couldn’t help but let out a muffled sob. 

He cried for his lost childhood and for the years he lost to Snoke. He cried for Ben Solo and Kylo Ren. He cried for his dad and for all of the ways he would never be what his father wanted him to be. He cried for the fact that his mom had once again risked her career to save him and make sure that her son was out of danger. He cried for Rey and everything she had been put through in her short life. And he cried because he was scared of what his life had in store for him next. 

“Everything is okay, Ben. It just took a long time to get here, but everything is finally okay,” she said as she squeezed him closer to her. “No more hiding, it’s time to regain your place in the world,” she added as she took a step back from her son and grabbed both sides of his face. 

“Not everyone gets a second chance. Go start your life, Ben,” said Leia sincerely, as she looked into Ben’s eyes. 

Ben nodded as he brought his hands up to wipe the tears from his eyes. “Thank you, mom. For...” he began as he regained his took a moment to regain his composure, but his mother interrupted. 

“I know, Ben. I know,” she responded as she smiled up at him then made her way back to her chair. 

Ben nodded at his mother again, then began to gather his belongings. “I’m going to go pack up my office,” he said as he pulled on his jacket. “Then look for an apartment in New York... then a job,” he added almost as if thinking aloud. 

“Oh, right,” said Leia suddenly as she located a piece of paper on her desk and handed it to Ben. “I almost forgot. I spoke with some of my former colleagues at the MET. If you’re interested, they have an educational outreach coordinator position opening up at the end of the month. The job hasn’t been listed yet, but Rose said to send her your resume and she would be happy to set up an interview at your earliest convenience,” she added smugly. 

Ben shook his head in disbelief. “Mom, that’s incredible. Thank you,” he began, but Leia cut him off again. “It was nothing. Go start your life Ben. And make sure to send me an invite to the wedding.” 


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Denouement

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is it y’all. Thank you for sticking around for my first fic. Stay safe and healthy xx

**4 years later**

Rey was struggling to calm her hammering heart as she looked out at the 59th street bridge waiting for Ben. The two had planned to have dinner to celebrate the four year anniversary of them moving to New York together, but Rey had received a call that afternoon that she had been offered a highly competitive managerial position at one of the best engineering firms in the city.

Everything that she had worked so hard for over the last four years had paid off and she couldn’t wait to surprise Ben with the news.

Since arriving in New York she had seen a different side of Ben, a side she fell more in love with every day. For the first time in his life, he was genuinely happy. Often, she would catch him smiling to himself when he thought no one was watching. He loved his job at the Met and he seemed to truly enjoy living together. He had even made friends for the first time in his life.

As their careers took off so did their relationship.

Rey felt at home. Which was something she had been desperately searching for her entire life and she had found it with Ben. 

She smiled excitedly to herself as she thought about their future together.

”I hope I’m not disturbing you Ms. Kenobi,” said a familiar deep voice.

Rey grinned wider and turned around to face the man she had been waiting for.

Ben pulled her into a hug then stepped back and placed his hands on the sides of her face and looked into her eyes. 

“You’re so beautiful, Rey,” he said quietly before closing the distance between them and kissing her firmly. 

Rey returned his kiss with earnest and she could feel him smile under the soft pressure of her lips.

After a moment Ben reluctantly pulled away from Rey. “As much as I love kissing you, I know you well enough that if I don’t feed you promptly you’re going to turn into a gremlin,” he joked as he took her hand and began to lead them away from their waterfront view of the bridge.

”Okay, first of all I’m fairly sure you’re NOT supposed to feed those little critters,” she began as she tugged on him to stop walking, but Ben cut her off. “After midnight,” he added quietly.

”Whatever. And two, I have to tell you something,” she said as she slipped her hand out of his and crossed her arms.

Ben’s smile faded slightly as he turned back toward Rey and gave her his full attention. 

Once more, a smile lit up Rey’s face and she bit her lip to keep herself from laughing out loud.

Ben began to grin along with her as he waited patiently for her to elaborate.

”I got it,” she said as she covered her mouth with her hands. Ben’s brows knit together in thought for a moment before she watched his eyes widen in understanding. 

Suddenly, the man in front of her put both arms up in the air and cheered as loud as he could. Rey couldn’t help but laugh before following suit and screaming into the night.

Rey felt happy tears streaming down her face as she felt Ben’s arms wrap around her and lift her into the air.

”They’re lucky to have you, Rey,” he said as he spun her around once and then placed her back on the ground. “Anyone you come across in this life is lucky to have even met you,” he added as he brushed a loose piece of hair behind her ear.

Rey beamed up at the man she loved and she kissed him firmly.

“Thank you, Ben. But you know I can say the same thing about you,” she said as she hugged him again and rested her head against his chest.

Ben rubbed Rey’s back as he pulled slightly away from her and smiled. 

“I actually have something to tell you too,” he said as he took a step back from Rey who was still on a high from the excitement.

Ben reached into the pocket of his jacket and his fingers brushed the crushed velvet box his mother had giving him years ago in his office as well as a delicately folded piece of paper. 

“Someone once wrote to me and told me that they hoped I found someone that one day made me less miserable,” he began as he handed Rey a familiar piece of blue paper that she had given him years before. He watched as her mouth gaped slightly as she realized what he had handed her.

”Well, Ms. Kenobi, I’m pleased to inform you that I finally did,” he said as he began to kneel in front of Rey. “And nothing would make me more profoundly happy than spending the rest of my life with you,” he added as he opened the ring box and met Rey’s eyes.

”Rey, will you marry me?”

Rey let out a happy sob as she nodded her head and let out a whispered “yes.” 

Ben gently took Rey’s hand and placed the ring on her finger, shaking slightly from an overwhelming whirlwind of emotions. 

Rey placed her other hand on his face as she knelt down with him and the two stared at each other smiling as tears of happiness rolled down Rey’s cheeks.

”I love you, Ben,” said Rey as she grinned wildly. 

Ben could barely contain his excitement as he stood and helped her up with him. He pulled Rey into a deep embrace and kissed the top of her head as he looked out over the dark water of the East River sprinkled with the reflection of lights from the glowing bridge above.

“I know,” he said as he drew her in closer and smiled into her hair. 

“I know.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for taking the time to read Profoundly (Un)happy. This is my first post here and the first fic that I've ever written. I love Star Wars and I've been really interested in the chemistry between Kylo and Rey since TFA. 
> 
> That being said, yes, I know Rey is a Palpatine. I honestly only made her a Kenobi in this story because I thought her name had a better ring to it. 
> 
> I actually really enjoyed TROS and I seem to be in the minority of people who were satisfied with the ending. With that said, this fic may give die hard Reylo fans the happy ending they craved from the movie. So please sit back and enjoy this slow burn.
> 
> I'd love to hear your thoughts and welcome any feedback you might have.
> 
> (Disclaimer: I don't own or claim to own Star Wars or the original characters from the films. This work is a work of creative fiction and has no affiliation with Disney or the Star Wars franchise.)


End file.
